I Love You More Than I Can Ever Scream

"It's Priest have a little priest..." The TV sang in my family room, as Andy and I hummed along to our choice movie for the evening, Sweeney Todd. It switched to a different seen where Johanna was talking to Judge Turpin.
"You know if you think about it, Johana is only sixteen." I said keeping my eyes locked on the screen.
"Wouldn't she be fifteen if her dad was sent away fifteen years ago?" Andy asked me.
"No because she was probably about one when he got taken away so she's like sixteen or seventeen and her dad wants to marry her." I said, and Andy chuckled.
"Yeah that's disgusting." He said laughing louder now. "Hey if your dad ever takes you to physco hospital, I'd pretend I was a wig makers apprentice to break you out."
"Awwwh." I said leaning my head on his chest.
"So Christmas break is coming up." He said casually. I nodded, it was one of the only things I had to protest against going on tour with the guys. I wasn't going to be home with my family for the holidays since the tour was over break. It was the first two weeks, and all though I was estatic to spend so long with Andy, and my best friends it was going to be hard to be without my family during a time I'm used to always being with them. It took forever to convince my parents to let me go, but with my constant pestering they finally gave in. The Nutcracker was the day before we left for tour, and it was a week away. I was nervous to dance in front of Andy, since he'd never seen me dance before. "Are you excited?"
"Yes!" I said jumping on his lap. He laughed.
"You know we'll probabaly have to sleep in the van were renting the whole time so their won't be a lot of room, you'll have to sleep pretty close to me." He smirked grabbing my waist, and I leaned in to kiss him passionately.
"I don't see the problem." I gave him a flirtatious smile, and he placed a kiss on my forehead, the my nose, and finally my mouth. Suddenly, we heard a loud knock on the door, and Peter and Danielle barged in. They immediately noticed us, and Danielle tensed up.
"Oh uh sorry." Peter said. Andy, and I both just glared at him. "We're just going to..go." We both nodded, and they left. Andy looked at me, and we burst into laughter before I fell into his chest.
"That's so fucking awkward." I said.
"I know." He said stroking my hair. I felt a deep depression sweep over me, and all the sudden I just wanted to..cry.
The tears pumped out fast, and heavy. Andy didn't see what was happening at first, but as I started gasping he tightened his arms around me.
"Babe, babe what's wrong? Why are you crying!" He exclaimed holding me against his chest.
"I-I don't know." I burst into another round of tears.
"Is it Danielle and Peter? You can tell me anything babe, you know that."
"I know that, of course, but I just don't know. All of the sudden I felt like...crying." I said gasping, and pulling away from his chest to look to at him. I realized that I was a deeply sad person. I felt broken even with Andy around, though less when I was in his arms. "Andy I feel...broken." He looked at me with the saddest eyes I'd ever seen. A single small tear ran down his pale, smooth cheek. My whole body started to shake, and Andy held me rubbing my arms trying to get my shaking to stop. "P-please help me feel whole again." I sobbed. His chest was racking with sobs now, and I had never felt so guilty for something in my life.

Notes

Awwh, to sad!