Bound By Love
Mysteries and Lust
Bill
Oh my god, he just looked at me. I quickly hid behind the tree and tightened my grip on the ends of my shirt. Here I am fangirling over some random guy I see in the park. Not like it matters, he can’t love a guy like me. I sighed and painfully stood up. I strolled through the grass and watched all the happy people enjoying to beautiful weather. This made my life feel even darker. I felt like someone poured a bucket of smelly socks on me. I am nothing but a stain on this world. I sometimes wonder if people cared about me.
“Hey, Bill!” I turned around and saw my brother running up to me. He didn’t know about what our father did to me. He was oblivious to the fact that I was even hurting. I blocked him out a long time ago because I just don’t need him pitying me.
“Hey Tom.” He pulled me into a hug which made me flinch a little.
“You okay?”
“Uh, yeah. I just hurt myself playing dodge ball in school.” I lied.
“Oh, well mom said you can visit the house this weekend. Wanna come over after school?”
“I uh, can’t. Dad needs me at home. Something about cleaning up for some business partner that’s visiting.”
“Bill, you haven’t come to the house since our parents divorced 10 years ago.” He sighed. “I’m starting to feel like I’m losing my twin brother.”
“I’m just really busy, Tom.”
“But why are you so damn busy?! You aren’t involved in any school clubs and the only thing that keeps you busy is dad.”
“Yeah, well we are very busy people. He doesn’t have mom to help him around the house, so I’m doing it instead.” He sighed and looked at me with this sad expression.
“We don’t go to the same school anymore and we rarely run into each other on the street. It’s almost like you’re avoiding me.”
“I’m not, Tom.” I wanted so badly to tell him that dad was beating me and raping me but I couldn’t. He worries enough about me and I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I knew I was the reason he stayed awake at night.
“Then why do you refuse to spend time with me?”
“I am not refusing, I just…I just…I have to go.” I didn’t have an excuse so I tried to walk away. I always try to run from my problems and it never works out for me.
“Wait!” I stopped and clenched my hands into fists. This was my defense mechanism. It supplied me with enough strength to overlook the people trying to break down my walls.
“What is it?”
“Mom told me that you’re on anti-depressants now. She said your therapist called her to confirm that you can take them. Since when did you get depressed? You were always so bubbly.”
“Not all of us can be like you Tom. You got over the divorce like it was any other hurdle in life. I still live day and night with that nightmare. I still remember being ripped from my mother’s arms and forced to live with a man, which I don’t care about. But over time we worked those differences out. I still hate him but I know he needs me and I won’t deny him that.”
“Bill, mom said if you’re that unhappy you can move in with us.”
“Oh, so I’m supposed to live with more strangers? No thank you, at least with dad, I know where I stand. I don’t have time for mom’s constant mood swings and ignorance.”
“Bill, we care about you.” Tom put his hand on my arm and rubbed it up and down. “I care about you.”
“Goodbye, Tom. I have to go. I have groceries to buy and food to prepare.” I snatched my arm away and walked away.
“Bill, you don’t have to be like this.” You have no idea Tom. No idea at all.
Andy
“Master Biersack, I have prepared your dinner.” I looked down at the ribeye steak and potatoes that the attendant prepared for me.
“Thanks, Anita. But I’m not hungry. You can save it for my mother.” I went up to my room and leaped into my bed. With a groan, I rolled onto my back. The ceiling looked so high up from my bed which reminded me of how big this world really was. It was a small town and this is the first time I’ve ever noticed this pale boy looking at me. Maybe he was there and I never looked up to see him? I couldn’t stop thinking about him though. He was just so peculiar. The way he looked so fragile and innocent from his spot next to the oak tree. The way he bit his lip in a nervous manner when he saw me looking at him. He was so strange indeed and today is the first time, the first time I saw him. I can’t get him off my mind.
“Andrew?” I sat up to see my mother walking in.
“Anita told me you didn’t eat your steak. Are you feeling okay?”
“I thought you had work, mom.”
“I finished and went looking for you in the park but decided you might’ve come home already.”
“I see. Well, I wasn’t hungry.” I deadpanned. I lay back down on my bed and she sighed.
“Andy-bug, mommy is really trying to be there for you but with this new promotion as an executive assistant I have so many more demands on my hands. I have to pay for this house and for your school and that means I have to work, honey.”
“I don’t care, mom.”
“I see, well then, please get dressed and fix your hair. We’re having guests tonight. One of our partners and his secretary and his secretary’s son are coming over tonight.”
“Sure.” She kissed my cheek and left the room. I went to my closet and pulled on a black button down, a pair of black skinny jeans and a pair of cleanest boots. I brushed my black hair into a ponytail and glared at my reflection. Time to put on a mask and pretend to be something I’m not.
“Andrew! Come down please, there are a few people I’d like you to meet.” I sighed and exited my room. I descended the staircase and came face to face with the boy from the park only he had braids and a lip ring and no makeup on and he was thicker.
“Andrew, this is Harriet Hunter, Simone Kaulitz and Simone’s son, Tom. This is my son, Andrew.”
“Hey.” I said while staring at him. No way was this the same kid. This kid didn’t have that lost, scared, depressed look in his eyes. This one had pride in his eyes.
“I’m sorry is there a problem?” He muttered.
“No. There isn’t.” I retorted. “But if you want there to be one, there could be one.”
“Boys! Let’s sit down and have dinner, shall we?” My mom chirped.
“Whatever.” Our small group migrated from the foyer to the dining room and we sat down while the maids brought out food. I glared at the teen from across the table and he returned my evil look.
“So Andrew, you attend Sacred Heart?”
“Yes, I have been going there since 9th grade.”
“I am sending Tom there. He isn’t doing so well in Catholic school.”
“You’re catholic?” My mom asked.
“No, but I thought the school would be good for him. I think private school would be best.”
“I wish you’d sign Bill up too. He’s stuck going to public school.” Tom groaned.
“We’ve discussed this, Tom. Your father is in charge of his education. And he can’t afford a private school.”
“Whatever.” He angrily shoved a piece of chicken into his mouth and chewed in an angry manner.
“So, about the fall deal, I was hoping we could see the building before we invest into the construction. My sponsors would like a blue print and we would also like to see the location where this building will stand.”
“Of course, we’ll be going to New York to check the location next week and I will have someone deliver copied of the blueprint to you tomorrow.”
“Excellent. I am so excited for this project. Simone, schedule a meeting with the sponsors for Friday.”
“Of course.” I hate these stupid work dinners.
“Mom, can I please go up to my room? I don’t feel well.” I lied.
“Fine honey. Get some rest.” She didn’t even care! I slammed my napkin down and went to my room. I sat at my desk and started sketching that boy from earlier. He is just stuck in mind and I have to know who he is. The teen downstairs in my dining room looks just like him so that makes the need to meet him even hungrier.
“Hey, why are you drawing my brother?” My head shot up and I met eyes with Tom.
Oh my god, he just looked at me. I quickly hid behind the tree and tightened my grip on the ends of my shirt. Here I am fangirling over some random guy I see in the park. Not like it matters, he can’t love a guy like me. I sighed and painfully stood up. I strolled through the grass and watched all the happy people enjoying to beautiful weather. This made my life feel even darker. I felt like someone poured a bucket of smelly socks on me. I am nothing but a stain on this world. I sometimes wonder if people cared about me.
“Hey, Bill!” I turned around and saw my brother running up to me. He didn’t know about what our father did to me. He was oblivious to the fact that I was even hurting. I blocked him out a long time ago because I just don’t need him pitying me.
“Hey Tom.” He pulled me into a hug which made me flinch a little.
“You okay?”
“Uh, yeah. I just hurt myself playing dodge ball in school.” I lied.
“Oh, well mom said you can visit the house this weekend. Wanna come over after school?”
“I uh, can’t. Dad needs me at home. Something about cleaning up for some business partner that’s visiting.”
“Bill, you haven’t come to the house since our parents divorced 10 years ago.” He sighed. “I’m starting to feel like I’m losing my twin brother.”
“I’m just really busy, Tom.”
“But why are you so damn busy?! You aren’t involved in any school clubs and the only thing that keeps you busy is dad.”
“Yeah, well we are very busy people. He doesn’t have mom to help him around the house, so I’m doing it instead.” He sighed and looked at me with this sad expression.
“We don’t go to the same school anymore and we rarely run into each other on the street. It’s almost like you’re avoiding me.”
“I’m not, Tom.” I wanted so badly to tell him that dad was beating me and raping me but I couldn’t. He worries enough about me and I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I knew I was the reason he stayed awake at night.
“Then why do you refuse to spend time with me?”
“I am not refusing, I just…I just…I have to go.” I didn’t have an excuse so I tried to walk away. I always try to run from my problems and it never works out for me.
“Wait!” I stopped and clenched my hands into fists. This was my defense mechanism. It supplied me with enough strength to overlook the people trying to break down my walls.
“What is it?”
“Mom told me that you’re on anti-depressants now. She said your therapist called her to confirm that you can take them. Since when did you get depressed? You were always so bubbly.”
“Not all of us can be like you Tom. You got over the divorce like it was any other hurdle in life. I still live day and night with that nightmare. I still remember being ripped from my mother’s arms and forced to live with a man, which I don’t care about. But over time we worked those differences out. I still hate him but I know he needs me and I won’t deny him that.”
“Bill, mom said if you’re that unhappy you can move in with us.”
“Oh, so I’m supposed to live with more strangers? No thank you, at least with dad, I know where I stand. I don’t have time for mom’s constant mood swings and ignorance.”
“Bill, we care about you.” Tom put his hand on my arm and rubbed it up and down. “I care about you.”
“Goodbye, Tom. I have to go. I have groceries to buy and food to prepare.” I snatched my arm away and walked away.
“Bill, you don’t have to be like this.” You have no idea Tom. No idea at all.
Andy
“Master Biersack, I have prepared your dinner.” I looked down at the ribeye steak and potatoes that the attendant prepared for me.
“Thanks, Anita. But I’m not hungry. You can save it for my mother.” I went up to my room and leaped into my bed. With a groan, I rolled onto my back. The ceiling looked so high up from my bed which reminded me of how big this world really was. It was a small town and this is the first time I’ve ever noticed this pale boy looking at me. Maybe he was there and I never looked up to see him? I couldn’t stop thinking about him though. He was just so peculiar. The way he looked so fragile and innocent from his spot next to the oak tree. The way he bit his lip in a nervous manner when he saw me looking at him. He was so strange indeed and today is the first time, the first time I saw him. I can’t get him off my mind.
“Andrew?” I sat up to see my mother walking in.
“Anita told me you didn’t eat your steak. Are you feeling okay?”
“I thought you had work, mom.”
“I finished and went looking for you in the park but decided you might’ve come home already.”
“I see. Well, I wasn’t hungry.” I deadpanned. I lay back down on my bed and she sighed.
“Andy-bug, mommy is really trying to be there for you but with this new promotion as an executive assistant I have so many more demands on my hands. I have to pay for this house and for your school and that means I have to work, honey.”
“I don’t care, mom.”
“I see, well then, please get dressed and fix your hair. We’re having guests tonight. One of our partners and his secretary and his secretary’s son are coming over tonight.”
“Sure.” She kissed my cheek and left the room. I went to my closet and pulled on a black button down, a pair of black skinny jeans and a pair of cleanest boots. I brushed my black hair into a ponytail and glared at my reflection. Time to put on a mask and pretend to be something I’m not.
“Andrew! Come down please, there are a few people I’d like you to meet.” I sighed and exited my room. I descended the staircase and came face to face with the boy from the park only he had braids and a lip ring and no makeup on and he was thicker.
“Andrew, this is Harriet Hunter, Simone Kaulitz and Simone’s son, Tom. This is my son, Andrew.”
“Hey.” I said while staring at him. No way was this the same kid. This kid didn’t have that lost, scared, depressed look in his eyes. This one had pride in his eyes.
“I’m sorry is there a problem?” He muttered.
“No. There isn’t.” I retorted. “But if you want there to be one, there could be one.”
“Boys! Let’s sit down and have dinner, shall we?” My mom chirped.
“Whatever.” Our small group migrated from the foyer to the dining room and we sat down while the maids brought out food. I glared at the teen from across the table and he returned my evil look.
“So Andrew, you attend Sacred Heart?”
“Yes, I have been going there since 9th grade.”
“I am sending Tom there. He isn’t doing so well in Catholic school.”
“You’re catholic?” My mom asked.
“No, but I thought the school would be good for him. I think private school would be best.”
“I wish you’d sign Bill up too. He’s stuck going to public school.” Tom groaned.
“We’ve discussed this, Tom. Your father is in charge of his education. And he can’t afford a private school.”
“Whatever.” He angrily shoved a piece of chicken into his mouth and chewed in an angry manner.
“So, about the fall deal, I was hoping we could see the building before we invest into the construction. My sponsors would like a blue print and we would also like to see the location where this building will stand.”
“Of course, we’ll be going to New York to check the location next week and I will have someone deliver copied of the blueprint to you tomorrow.”
“Excellent. I am so excited for this project. Simone, schedule a meeting with the sponsors for Friday.”
“Of course.” I hate these stupid work dinners.
“Mom, can I please go up to my room? I don’t feel well.” I lied.
“Fine honey. Get some rest.” She didn’t even care! I slammed my napkin down and went to my room. I sat at my desk and started sketching that boy from earlier. He is just stuck in mind and I have to know who he is. The teen downstairs in my dining room looks just like him so that makes the need to meet him even hungrier.
“Hey, why are you drawing my brother?” My head shot up and I met eyes with Tom.
@Purdy's_little_lady_outlaw there's a sequel called Fond Memories
5/6/14