Dear Insanity

Chapter 6- Without You There Is No Me
Andy’s Point Of View
I wake up to my alarm going off but there’s no way that I’m going to the studio today. I quickly get my phone and call in sick. I’m sure that they can record the instruments or something. I pull myself out of bed and take a quick shower. I then walk downstairs and make a coffee and sit in the lounge room while thinking of what I should tell her.
She’s probably at Jack’s house and it’s only 10am so I’m not even sure if she’ll be awake but it’s worth a shot.
I press call next to her number and wait for her to answer.
Imogen’s Point Of View
I wake up and look over at my phone; 7am. I’m never awake this early so I go back to sleep, well at least try to. I stare at the white wall of the guest room in Jack’s house hoping that Andy will call me because I overreacted. I should have asked him what actually happened instead of just leaving the room silent.
~~
I wake up to hearing a knock on the door. I guess I actually did fall asleep again.
“Sorry I fell asleep.” I say as I open the door.
“That’s fine do you want a coffee or something?” Jack asks.
“Nah I’m okay.” I give him a fake smile and he walks off into the kitchen.
I hear my phone ring from the bedside table. I walk over to it and answer it.
“Imogen before you hang up let me explain this first please.” Andy says quickly. He probably expected me to hang up and I don’t blame him.
“I wasn’t going to hang up,” I say calmly, “Can I come back and we can sort this out properly?”
“I was going to ask you if you could, I’ll see you soon?” Andy asks.
“Yeah, I’ll leave soon.”
We both hang up and I walk into the kitchen.
“That was Andy; he said that he wanted to talk to me.” I explain to Jack.
“Hopefully you guys can sort things out.” Jack smiles.
“Yeah hopefully. I don’t mean to seem rude but I have to get going, we should hang out more often. When we’re both not upset about something.”
“Yeah that would be nice.”
We say our byes and hug and then I get my stuff and start driving home. I put on The Boy Who Could Fly by Pierce The Veil and continue driving.
“Freeze!
It's time to take you home, it feels so early but I promised I would bring you to your door.
Now our lips are numb!
As we walk, sharing warm alcohol
That kiss tastes like summer.

I hope you like the stars I stole for you,
One hundred million twinkle lights in neon blue.
I'll be the brightest someday!
I'll be the brightest someday!
I'll be the brightest, you'll see!

Don't rain on my parade, it's gonna glow in the dark.
I like it better when you can't keep warm.
Don't ruin a perfect thing, a perfect thing.
The boy on the blue moon dreams of sun.

Now as the rain falls like shattered pieces of glass from the sky, we bleed like water colors and drunken pastels down the stairways.
And I ask myself, why do I still pray?
When will it end? And who fucking cares?

I swear to God I did what I could.
I practically begged you, I pretended everything was fine.
A soul sacrifice, an American nightmare.
I'd rather be dead.

Don't rain on my parade, it's gonna glow in the dark.
I like it better when you can't keep warm.
Don't ruin a perfect thing, a perfect thing.
The boy on the blue moon hears a nightmare in his head.

I'll bet you money as you're running to the bathroom, you barely started drinking but your beauty never stopped you.
You died in California by the sulfur and the sea.
I guess I never should have loved you, but I do forever 'cause you loved me.

And I break my glasses as I fall in the street!
If you were gonna leave this world how could it be without me?
Now it's all over my tongue and still it has no taste,
'cause without you there is no me.
There's no me at all.
Sometimes love dies like a dog.

(Why don't we just let this one take care of itself?)

Don't rain on my parade, it's gonna glow in the dark.
I like it better when you can't keep warm.
Don't ruin a perfect thing, a perfect thing.
The boy on the blue moon dreams...
Don't rain on my parade.
I'm losing a perfect thing, a perfect thing, a perfect thing.”
The song finishes and a couple of seconds later I arrive home. I get out of my car and walk up to the door. I knock on it and then wonder why I’m even knocking on the door of my own house. A million things start running through my mind. Why does Andy even bother with me? He can do so much better and even he knows that. Juliet was probably better off with him. I don’t even need to be here. People want me to kill myself. Why should I live a life when people want me dead and I don’t even do anything anyway?
“Andy I’m sorry for running away I should have listened to you.” I say with tears running down my face as Andy opens the door. I put my arms around him and he surprisingly hugs me back.
“Imogen I’m so sorry it won’t happen again.” He kisses my cheek and hugs me to him. “I can explain.”
“I don’t want you to, just don’t do it again please Andy.” I bury my face into his chest and keep crying.
“I won’t, I promise.”
“Andy I need help.” I say quietly as I calm down a little bit.
“Help for what? What’s wrong?” Andy says with panic in his voice.
I take a deep breath and deicide upon telling him because the last time I didn’t tell anyone it went on for years. “Andy I-I want to hurt myself again.”
“You’re not going to and this time I’m going to help you through it okay.” Andy pulls me closer to him and hugs me tightly.
“Thank you.”
“We could watch a movie? Would that help?” Andy asks me.
I nod my head and he goes up to our room and comes back with the covers from our bed and all the pillows.
“Pick out a DVD and I’ll make a fort for us to watch the movie in.” Andy starts building the fort and I walk over to where we keep all of our DVDs and look through them.
I pick out 21 Jump Street, mainly because it’s funny and I turn around to see that Andy’s still making the fort so I go into the kitchen to get some stuff for us to eat during the movie.

Notes