My Saviour.

I woke up to the sound of loud voices but then heard Andy:
"Guys shut up, you'll wake Morgan." He hissed.
"Too late." I groaned, moving my now pastel pink hair out of my face. I really, REALLY need to re-dye it.
"Sorry, we didn't see you down there Morgan." Ashley said.
I was about to say a sassy comeback but I was interrupted by my phone:
'YOU'D FUCK LIKE A WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE.'

"Well that's an interesting ring tone." Jinxx chuckled.
I smiled at him, then stepped away from all the guys and leaned against the wall.
"Hello?" I said into the phone but there was just a beep and then silence.
"Weird." I mumbled myself as I went into the kitchen. I got down a glass and filled it with water. I then walked back into the living room with the glass still in my hand when my phone went off again. I picked it up with my free hand while standing behind the 3 seater couch.

"Hello, Is this Morgan Wolfe?" A man on the other line asked.
"This is she, who are you?" I questioned.
"I am officer Newman. We have found your brother, Cameron Wolfe."
"REALLY WHERE IS HE?!" I yelled excitedly into the line which made all the guys look over at me.
"I'm afraid he commit suicide last night. We found his body under L.A bridge at 8.00 AM this morning."
"W-What." I felt a tear slip out of my eye.
"He did have a suicide note which he tied next to someone else's. We know the one next to his is yours, But we weren't sure if you were still alive or not but we couldn't find your body so we assumed you didn't jump."
"I can't believe this.." I whispered.
"I'm terribly sorry, We left his note where it was so you can have it because we know how keen you have been to find him and we know how much you love him.." He had a hint of sadness in his voice.

It then hit me.

He's gone.
I will never see him again.
Never hear him again.
Never hug him.
This could all be my fault if he jumped because of me.

I felt the glass slip right out of my hand and it went crashing into the ground.
"H-He's g...gone. What did his n.. note say?" I stumbled on my words.
"Uhm.. He said that he had no reason to live anymore if you weren't alive." He was hesitant to tell me.
"I...It's a-all my fault. Th-The one person I c-care about. Is gone. Because of me." I felt a few more tears slid out of my eyes.
"I'm so sorry Morgan."
I looked over at the guys who all had confused/worried expressions on their faces.
"H.... He can't be gone." I was sobbing into the phone at this point. Andy had came over to me and put a hand on my shoulder, trying to comfort me.
"I'm afraid he is. If you're wondering anything else about his suicide, It says it all in his note. So uh.. Drive down and read it if you want too. But could I please speak to one of your guardians?"
"Yes." I sighed and handed Andy the phone, he shot me a confused look but talked anyway.

I shuffled over to the single chair, sat in it and brought my knees to my face. I continued sobbing, attempting to calm myself down but it was no use. By this time Ashley, CC, Jake and Jinxx where all trying to comfort me but it really wasn't working. Andy was still on the phone, talking about how this whole thing is my fault.

This I had kept as a secret to the guys, they didn't know Cam was missing. Hell they didn't even know I had a brother. I would have to explain to them now about everything.
About how all of this is my fucking fault.

I was sobbing even harder when Andy was finished on the phone. He threw my phone on the couch and came over to me. He lifted me up, then sat down where I was sitting and placed me into his lap. I shuffled around so I was now crying into his chest which he didn't seem to mind. Now everyone was trying to comfort me and say everything was going to be okay.

'How the fuck are things going to be okay.
My brother is dead because I'm so stupid.'

I thankfully managed to calm myself down a little, so now there were just stray tears falling down my face.
"Right, Morgan. I think you have some explaining to do.. Who is Cam?" Andy asked with the softest tone he could possibly use.
I took a jagged breath and looked at the 5 concerned faces waiting for my reply.
"L-look. I haven't told you guys something.. I- I have a brother and his name was Cam.. We were twins actually and uh.. When o-our parents died w-we got put in the same adoption place.. W-we were really close.. B-But when we were 13 we went to the bridge that Andy found me on. And uh.. We were talking but then we started arguing and I got up and left..
I-I came back 15 m-minuets later. To see Cam being dragged off by some man. I didn't get a chance to see who it was. The last thing I ever said to him was I'm sorry..." I wiped away the few tears that were falling down my cheeks.
"I-It's all my fault really. Because if I wasn't such a dick and left I could of fought the man off.. But I was stupid..
I've been looking for Cam since that day, I called the police and they have been searching ever since. B-But now.. They found him.. H-He commit suicide on that same bridge because I was stupid and fucking left my suicide note there and Cam thought I was dead so he killed himself to join me! And now it's my fucking fault he's dead." I then started to cry into Andy's chest again.
"Shit.." I heard CC mumble as I continued to cry into Andy.
"Morgan, it's okay we're gonna get through this." Andy whispered into my ear as he hugged me.
"When Andy." I broke free of his grip. "When the fuck am I going to get through this. I practically KILLED my brother!" I half-yelled, but then returned to sobbing.
"It's not your fault." Ashley said in a soothing voice.
"What. So you're saying that if my suicide note wasn't there he would still be dead?" I asked while starring at him.
He stayed silent.
"You know everything happens in life for a reason?" CC said.
"Yeah, there's no point in regretting everything because you can't go back and change anything anyway." Jinxx pointed out.
"I know. I don't believe in regrets. I fucking believe in being stupid and stubborn." I managed to say between sobs.
No one said anything after that. But Andy pulled me into a tight hug and he didn't let go. Everyone else was silent which I was slightly relieved about, not that I didn't love them comforting me but it was just too overwhelming.
Eventually the tears stopped and I pulled away from the hug. I then noticed how wet I made Andy's shirt from all the tears.
"Uh Andy.. I'm sorry about your shirt." I mumbled.
"Why? because you got it wet? That doesn't matter, the tears will dry. Just like the ones on your cheeks will too. You will get through this. I promise you that." He said softly.
I gave him a small smile saying thank you. I leaned back into his chest and sighed heavily.
"Hey isn't today Friday?" Andy said out of nowhere.
"Yeah, why?" Jake answered.
"I was thinking if we could head up to Magic Mountain tomorrow?" He asked.
"That sounds fun." Ashley smiled.
"I LOVE ROLLER COASTERS!" CC yelled.
"Morgan do you want to come?" Jinxx asked me.
"Sure." I mumbled, trying not to sound as depressed as I was. Obviously that didn't work.
"I'm going to bed now anyway.. Night." I said while getting off Andy's lap.
I walked out of the room and padded up the stairs. When I got to my room I went over to my bedside table and got my iPod. I plugged in my earphones and started listening to My Chemical Romance. When The Black Parade came on I completely lost it, I started crying into my pillows. Not caring that the guys could hear me, not caring the the whole of LA could probably hear me because of how loudly I was crying. But I couldn't help it, all this is my fault.
I killed Cam because I was so stupid and left my note there.
I didn't deserve to live anymore.
Cam is dead, so I should be dead.

'I'll end it soon.. I doubt I'll be able to jump off that bridge without being caught. I'll find a way. Andy will get over me and so will the others. I can't mean that much to them. Can I?'
I thought as I let my eyes close, letting a dark dreamful sleep take me away.

Notes

I tried okay.
I tried making it all sad and stuff but obviously that didn't work >_>

I'm super duper stressed and uhghhhhh. I'm sorry my chapters have been sucking</3
Hopefully soon I will be back on track.

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I love you guys more than I could ever scream.

Never Give In, Never Back Down and We'll Brave This Storm.
xxx
~FlareOfTheDevil~