In the End

Healy looked completely unamused and shocked. He took the glasses off of his face and put them on his desk. "Miss Welch, if you have a baby on the way, I think online schooling would be a good choice. You would be able to keep up with all of your school work and watch the baby. And with help from your.. boyfriend?" I nodded. "Everything will be fine!"

"That's the problem," I laughed. I saw Andy scratch the back of his neck. "Andy here is in a band, which means touring which means rarely home, which means, you get the point. It's just not going to work for me." Mr. Healy picked his glasses back up and put them on the bridge of his nose.

"If you insist," he huffed. Typing some things into the computer. "All of your classes will be voided within the next forty-eight hours."

"Thank you, sir." Andy chimed in. I smiled. He was trying so hard to go along with this.

Healy nodded and before he gave us our farewell he spoke up. "Wait, son! Are you in the band, Black Veil Brides?" Andy nodded. "My daughter loves you guys! And my son, haha! They begged to go to the concert a few nights ago, but me nor my wife were able to."

"Well, next show we have in L.A., your kids will be at the top of the list," he said. "Goodbye, sir."

Andy intertwined his fingers with mine and we walked out of the admissions office. "Well, that went better than expected," I said, strapping myself in. Andy agreed to drive back to my house from here.

"Yeah, it did." He started the car and we were on our way. The radio wasn't on, and it was just silence. I wasn't complaining. I was with the man I love and there's nothing I would trade for that. The silence between us was nowhere near awkward. It was nice and comfortable. I feel great now that all that weight is off of my shoulders. Andy grabbed my hand and held it across the center console. "Reagan, I have a question."

I nodded, signaling for him to go on. "Do you want kids?" he asked. My eyes shot open. I mean, yeah, I was able to pull off that lie to Healy, but I didn't actually want to think about a fetus growing inside of me.

But, I was going to truthfully answer his question. "Yes, I do." I sighed. "I want a girl and a boy. Carter for a girl, and Kian for a boy." I love love love those names, and if I have kids one days, those will be their names.

I turned and saw Andy smile. "I like it. But, I don't think I'm ready for kids. To be honest, I don't think I'm ever going to be ready for kids."

"What do you mean?"

"You basically proved it. If we were to have kids, you would be parenting by yourself. I would be gone a lot and when I was home, I wouldn't know what to do. It would be a hard life if we had kids, Reagan, and I don't know if I'll ever be ready to take on that challenge."

That hurt my heart. I've wanted kids since I was little, than there was an incident, and I never wanted to speak about kids. But, when I met Andy, I knew I would want to have a family with him. Have little Biersacks running around. But, that sucks that he is basically saying he doesn't want kids. "Oh." was all I managed to get out.


When we got back to my house, I went straight to my room. The whole talking about kids made me really sad and depressed. Not because Andy doesn't want them, because it brings up bad memories.

"No, no, no!" I whispered. My vision was blurry, but not blurry enough. I looked at the two pink lines on the plastic stick and felt my whole world collapse on me. "Taryn." I croaked. The door flew open and Taryn was standing there.

"No," she whispered. "No, please tell me it's not positive."

"I wish I could," I whispered. I dropped the stick and turned to look at her. She engulfed me in a hug and I just cried. I didn't want this.

No one would want this. "Tar," I said. "I have to get rid of this."

I didn't even realize I was crying, but I was. thinking about that hits me hard. It was a dark time, and I just want to erase that out of my past. But, unfortunately, I know I can't.

The door open and Andy came in. He soon rushed over to me when he saw I was crying. "Hey, hey what's wrong?" he cooed, holding me.

I had tot think of something fast. "Nothing, I was just thinking about how lucky I am to have you." Reagan you are so fucking stupid.

"So, they were happy tears?" he asked. I nodded.

I wasn't ready to tell him. I don't think I'll ever be ready to tell him. He won't love me after that.

Notes

oh shiiiiit.