I Gave It All

Claudia's POV~~

As I sat there crying, Jake was trying to get me to open the door. I just continued to sob. I heard another set of footsteps come up to the door.

"Bro, if she doesn't want to come out, let her stay in there by herself. If she wants company, she'll let someone in." Ashley said. After that, I heard them walk away. I stopped crying, but just sat there, sniffling. I felt crowded, even though I was by myself. I stood up and opened the door, not expecting Jake to be standing there. He smiled softly at me, but I just walked past him. I grabbed a water bottle on my way out of the bus and I walked about ten feet away from the bus, sitting down under a tree. I cracked the lid open on my water and took a drink. I saw a guy waking towards me. He wasn't far away either. He reached me and sat next to me.

"Hey." He said.

"Who are you?" I asked.

"I'm no one, don't worry." He said.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Just trust me." He said. I hated hearing those three words in a sentence together. I looked over at him and spilled my water on me.

"Go. Just fucking leave." I said with a shaky voice.

"So, now you recognize me." He said with a slight chuckle. I don't know if I ever mentioned this, but I had a boyfriend in high school, and this was him. His name? Jared.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"I want you, Claudia." Jared said.

"You think I'm going to go with you?" I asked. Jared looked at me, tears in his eyes. Jared was the best boyfriend that I ever had, besides Jake.

"I didn't think that. Just thought I'd tell you." He said with a sniffle. I sighed.

"I can't, Jared." I said.

"Why?" He asked.

"Because... I have a boyfriend, and I just totally ignored him by walking off that bus. He tried to help me, but I just walked away." I said.

"I see. Is that him, over there?" Jared asked. I looked to where he was pointing and I saw CC standing by the bus.

"No, that's CC, the drummer of his band." I said.

"Your boyfriend is in a band?" Jared asked.

"Yeah. He is. Do you remember my younger cousin, Cam?" I asked. Jared nodded.

"The main reason I'm sitting right here tonight instead of sitting next to Jake inside that bus on that couch, is because my aunt and uncle died." I said.

"Oh Claudia. I'm so sorry." Jared said.

"It's okay. I just needed to blow off some steam, sit under a tree in the cool night air for a bit, and get over it." I said.

"If there's one thing I've learned, it's that you never get over a person's death, no matter how close they are to you. No matter how hard you try to get over it, there will always be that part of you where you know that it'll never happen. You know why? It's because you love that person. A person's death isn't a reason for you, or anyone else to stop living, but at the same time, it makes you feel like you need to just end it. But that's never a good idea. So please, go back inside that bus, talk to your boyfriend, your cousin, and anyone else on that bus, and just live your fucking life like you have no boundries. I love you Claudia, don't ever fucking forget that, and I will never stop loving you, you know why?" Jared asked.

"Why?" I asked, my voice cracking a bit.

"Because you were the best girlfriend I've ever had. Why did it end?" He asked.

"I... had said that I needed some space for a bit, and you tried to get me stay, but I couldn't. I'm so sorry, Jared." I said.

"No, that's not why we ended it. We ended it, because we loved each other too much, but it was too much for either of us to handle at seventeen years old." Jared said. I looked at him and a tear fell down my face. He gently wiped it away.

"Jared.." I whispered. He always did this, always made me love him even more, but I couldn't love him. I've got Jake now.

"Don't do this to yourself. you'll only get hurt even more. Don't let your thoughts take control. " Jared said. My lip quivered and more tears fell.

"Please stop crying." Jared said.

"I can't, Jared." I said.

"I have to go, Claudia. I love you, just remember that, alright?" Jared asked. I nodded and he kissed my cheek, then got up and left. I sighed and started sobbing again. I heard footsteps running over and then someone sat next to me. The person was breathing heavy.

"Claudia, are you okay?" Jake asked. I looked over at him and shook my head. He wiped my tears away and hugged me while I cried. I couldn't help but think that Jared was watching. I pulled away from Jake and he put my messy hair in a pony tail. I smiled weakly at him and he kissed me. I pulled away and rested my head on Jake's shoulder, enjoying the night air. I looked over at the bushes and noticed Jared was peering through them, smiling. He noticed me and winked. I smiled back and Jake helped me up. We walked back to the bus in silence.

Notes

So there you are. A nice slow chapter. I think of you turned on a slow song, the effect of the chapter will be better. :)