Andy and Chris packed our bags into the trunk of the Biersacks car. I was having a bit of climate shock. It was 70 in LA and maybe 25 here. I forgot how I used to live in Illinois and ever enjoy cold weather. Chris drove out of the parking lot with Amy in the passenger seat and Andy and I in the back seat. Andy shared small talk with his parents as we took the hour and a half drive back to their home.

Chris looked back at me in the rear view mirror, "So I never did hear about how you guys got back together, I just heard you were living together."

"Oh," I said quietly. What do I say? 'I fucked your son at a party. Did I mention I was tipsy and used him to cheat in a long term relationship?' "Ashley was still in a relationship with my best friend Siren. They convinced us to talk and we just realized how much we missed each other."

"Oh. So how'd you get to LA? I thought you were living in Florida?" he asked.

I felt a little embarrassed. "It just got difficult being away from Andy and on opposite ends of the country. I really didn't have anything to keep me in Florida, and Andy helped me find some great opportunities."

His hand reached for mine and held it on my thigh, "Jakes gonna mix some of her work once Jinxx gets all the studio set up in our house. We are hoping to move it onto John Feldman and have him produce her." He smiled with his teeth for once, "She's got some great music."

"What genre? Metal, punk, heavy?" Chris egged.

"Um...just acoustic. I like alternative acoustic." I continued, "I like the sound of a singer and an acoustic guitar. It just seems more natural. I love Andy's music, but for myself I feel like its what I'm meant to create."

"Oh so you are like Jul-" Chris stopped as Andy kicked the back of this seat and coughed. He gave his dad a stern look in the mirror. Andy knew I hated being compared to Juliet, we were nothing alike. Last I heard she got runner up in The Voice and her deal with the label fell through. She was in a relationship with some other musician. I think it was Ronnie Radke, actually. What a perfect pair.

"So how was your flight?" Amy asked to break the tension.

"Long," I said quietly.

Andy laughed, "How would you know? You were asleep on my shoulder most of the flight."
"It's Whiskeys fault!"

Chris seemed confused, "You guys were up drinking?"

"No no no! Whiskeys my cat! Crow was getting lonely so Andy got me a cat," I said quickly.

I basically avoided conversation because I felt like I was stepping on my own toes. I think his parents could tell how shy and awkward I was. They didn't pressure me for anymore conversation and instead spent the last half an hour talking with Andy about how things had been at home and how the rest of their family was doing. They talked about small shops they loved going to and neighbors and how things had changed since Andy's last visit when his grandfather had passed. I basically just stared out the window until Chris pulled into the driveway of their home. I gathered up my purse and stepped out the car when Andy opened the door for me. I waited a moment to help with our bags but Andy already had those slung over his shoulder or in his hands. We walked up the the door and his parents showed us into the cozy home, the kind you expect hadn't been rearranged or redecorated in at least ten years. Photos of Andy in his childhood were hung on the walls and some Andy looking very serious in junior high and high school.

"We will give you guys some time alone," Amy said. "Dinner will be ready in an hour." She had a very warm smile. I gave her a hug and thanked her for her hospitality. She was a strong hugger and gave me a gentle squeeze. "Sure, anytime."

I followed Andy to the second floor of the house and down the hall to his bedroom. I was right. This hadn't changed since his teens. Photos of bands plastered the walls. A bass was leaning against a desk, covered in notebooks and crumpled paper. His bed was even messy still. He excused himself to the bathroom and I walked over to the desk and picked up a particular notebook that caught my eye. All of them were black notebooks but unlike the others this one seemed the most abused. I glanced over my shoulder and opened the book, flipping through the scibbles, crossed out lines, and words that seems to be carved into the paper instead of written. Just holding this book I felt nothing but pain and exclusion. I found a journal entry in the center of the book from his sophomore year in high school.

I fucking hate this place.

I hate everyone in it.

I hate everything.

I hate myself.

They make me hate myself.

Since I'm ADHD I'm apparently no better than a retarded kid. We watch movies and stupid shit. I'm in a class with kids who are criminals and kids who are hopelessly mental. Why the fuck am I here? I hate being threatened. I miss my old school. I want to go back. I wasn't necessarily liked there but at least I was that kind of mystery kid everyone kind of wondered about and no one bothered. I think they were scared of me actually. But this public school sucks. Mom and dad want me to keep trying but all I think about is dying. I want to die. I want to leave. I never want to be here. I don't fucking need school. I want to be a musican.

I guess I can't even do that. My teacher said my English assignments are too dark and my style of writing is horrendous. He doesn't understand. I'm in a class with gang members. I keep my front up but I don't want to get my ass shanked.

I'm done.

I hate this. I hate this.

I hate myself.

It honestly broke my heart to read the journal entry. Its hard to believe my rock was this hurt and this vulnerable. A foot step down the hall caused me to drop the book back onto the desk. I was just acting like I was trying to get a better look of a poster behind the desk of Nikki Sixx.

Andy came into the bedroom and jumped onto the bed. He sighed loudly and closed his eyes. I walked over to the bed and sat on the edge. I scooted up to sit on my legs beside him, leaning over and running my hands over his chest. "Mmm," he growled. "That feels wonderful."

I giggled to myself and continued to move my fingers in small circles over his shoulders and chest. I unzipped his hoodie and pushed the sides over his edges of his ribs. He had the blue Montley shirt on still and I continued to massage. "Here, flip over."

Andy did as I said and so I removed his jacket. I had recently grown out my nails and instead of massaging I scraped my nails over his back in circles while he rested his chin on his hands. "Ohhhhh." I started laughing at Andy's satisfaction. "Ohhhhh my goodddd. Don't stop." I continued to scratch his back until I couldn't really feel my nails anymore. "That was amazing." He sat up and wrapped his arms around me from over my shoulders. As his hands retracted, they settled on my shoulders, casually pinching and stretching my muscles.

"Ahhh, Andy," I exclaimed. "Oh that's perfect."

His hands continued from my shoulders and slowly down my back and onto my middle back. My eyes were closed in blissful ecstasy. I shuddered as Andy's lips pressed against my neck. I leaned away from the kiss but his lips only pressed harder. His warm breath spilled over the moist skin, making my whole spine feel electrocuted. I turned toward him as his hands rested on the sides of my hips. Our breath collided, making the atmosphere more tense. With so much tenderness and care, he pressed his lips into mine and let them go, but it left me needing more, so I leaned forward and pressed my lips into his, turning my torso to bring us closer. One of his hands moved down to my thigh and caressed it and I wrapped mine around his neck.

A gentle cough separated us as we looked to the doorway to see Chris. Oh well isn't this wonderful. "Dinners ready,' he said.

Andy nodded and we couldn't help but feel like we were sixteen again and got caught. It didn't help that we were in his childhood bedroom, on Batman sheets. We laughed just like we would if we were younger. Andy took my hand and led me to their dining room, which Amy and Chris were putting the final finishes on. The table was set, a few plates of food were in the center.

"Reya, what would you like to drink?" Amy asked as she pulled a few glasses down from a cabinet.

"Tea?" I asked tentiviely. Amy smiled and went to the fridge. Andy took a seat on one side of the table and motioned for me to sit beside him. I joined the table, Chris placing a glass in front of me and then they took their seats around the table, Andy and I on one side and them on the other.

"Prayer?" Amy said quietly. We all joined hands. "Dear heavenly father, we would like to give you thanks for the food on our table and our health. Thank you for watching over all of us in our travels, and bringing Reya into our company. In his name we pray, Amen."

"Amen," Chris said as he pulled a healthy portion of lasagna onto his plate and dug in. "So you kids have any plans?"

"I think, Andy was gonna take me to some of his favorite places," I said before I took a small bite of pasta.

"Oh! That will be fun!" Amy added with a smile.

Andy had almost her exact smile, "I think so. Is that little cafe still open off of 16th?"

"I think so. The little pastry shop?"

"Yeah!" Andy said between bites.

"I think so," Chris added. Suddenly his fork dropped and he stared at me.

I froze, absolutely clueless. All of us looked around. His eyes looked down and then back to my eyes. Then to Andy, then me.

"Chris what is it?" Amy asked, placing a hand tenderly in his shoulder, concern lacing her face.

He looked at Andy. "Is that what I think it is?"

Andy looked to me in confusion. His gaze returned to his dad to see his dad pointing at his own hand...to the ring in his left hand...Oh fuck. "What? That's your wedding ring?" Andys face blanked. "Oh. Um," he took my hand in his, "I guess I forgot to fill you guys in. When Reya and I got to LA together...I uh...I proposed to her. She's my...uh...fiancé."

Chris's face was unreadable. Amy lit up like a Christmas tree. She jumped up from her seat and rushed over to me, embracing me. "Oh my goodness! I can't believe it. My boys getting married. Welcome to the family, Reya!" She released me, wiping tears of joy from her eyes. "Oh, my eyes. Andy! How could you not tell your dear mom that you were getting married? When is the wedding?"

Andy and I exchanged a glance, "I think September 7th," I said with a smile.

"Oooh! A late summer wedding! That's sounds wonderful! We should have some wine to celebrate!" she rushed into the kitchen. She opened up a cabinet, but standing on her tippy toes, she was unable to reach the shelf.

Andy stood up and walked over to her, "Let me, mom." He pulled down four champagne glasses, returning them to the table.

Chris was still blank faced but participated in toasting with us. Dinner was finished with Amy and Andy and I discussing wedding ideas. I excused myself, thanking Amy for the meal, to go sleep since I was starting to feel jet lagged. Andy was going to join me but Chris asked him to come down the the basement and watch some TV. Amy was going to clean up the kitchen. I offered to help but she insisted I go rest.

I climbed the stairs to Andy's bedroom and laid on the bed. The sheets were soft and smelled like Andy. I felt so comfy. But yet, as exhausted as my body was, my mind was horrifically confused. Why had Andys dad not been happy about our engagement. Amy was obviously over joyed. But Chris didn't react, and that honestly scared me a lot. My parents already hated Andy, and the last thing I wanted was Chris hating me. He dropped his fork when he saw my ring. Honestly I assumed his parents already knew we were engaged but I thought Andy would have told them. I guess not. I had a horrible habit of over thinking everything. Maybe I am just over thinking. He didn't seem mad, or at least I think he didn't. Why did he need to talk to Andy? Oh god, maybe he doesn't like me and that's what he is talking to Andy about. Andy wouldn't leave me would he? No. No he wouldn't. God this is so confusing. Why. Why. Why. My head was practically pounding from the stress. I decided to get some ibuprofen since this was actually giving me a headache. I got up and went to the bathroom, Amy passing me in the hall.

"Do you need something, Reya?"

I felt kind of shy, "Yeah..haha. Do you have any ibuprofen? I've got a headache."

"Sure, I've got some in my bathroom. Here, follow me." She continued down the hall to her and Chris's room and then to the master bath. After rummaging through the cabinet she gave me two maroon pills.

"Thank you, this jet lag just gets me," I laughed as I swallowed.

"Oh I understand! We flew to England once to watch Andy and goodness that was horrible for me with the time difference!" I followed her back into the master bedroom and sat beside her on the edge of the bed. "I swear I don't know how those boys do all that traveling, but you know that's all Andy ever wanted. He would run around dressed like Ace Freylie and Alice in Chains costumes. Goodness. There wasn't a day that wasn't running around with some make up or face paint of some type. Even in junior high and high school he usually had eyeliner on and black painted nails. Never a dull day In our house!"

"Haha, he still does that!" I laughed. "Sometimes I laugh because if I find eyeliner on sale I'll buy a ton of it and I get weird looks, especially when I say it's for me and my boyfriend! That always kills them!"

"Ahh wonderful days! He can light up a room."

"Oh definitely," I smiled. "Well I'm gonna get some sleep. Thank you, Mrs. Biersack." I hugged her.

"Haha call me Amy, sweetie!"

"Alright," I laughed. "Goodnight, Amy."

"Goodnight, Reya."

Notes

Hope you guys enjoy :)
some drama and some love and a bit of everything

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