Reyas POV
Someone tapped my shoulder as I passed my leather jacket to the holders. "Excuse me?"
I whipped around at the familiar voice. Freezing in my place as I took in the gorgeous blue eyes piercing into me from a foot up. The shock was written on his face. I stumbled backward, trying to run, but duly tripping over my own feet as I turned on my heel. My foot went sideways on the slick venue floor and I slid to the floor. A pair of strong arms braced me, suddenly wrapping around my waist before my face hit the floor. I was hauled up to my feet, where I found myself only a few inches away from the body of none other than Andy Biersack.
"Reya," he whispered. The pain rang in his voice and clouded in his icey irises.
"I...I go-gotta go," I said as I pulled away from his grasp and ran through the crowd. I pulled off my high heels as I turned a corner and sprinted through the massive crowd.

My head was spinning and my heart was pounding against my ribs with enough force to break open an industrial vault. I couldnt breathe. I was going into a panic attack. I could feel it. I spotted Siren talking in a small group of people. I angrily stomped across the floor to her, grabbing her arm and jerking her around to face me.
"What the hell?!" she yelled as she looked me in the eyes.
"What the hell? You fucking brought me here! What's going on and why the fuck is Andy here?!" I finally realized who Siren was surrounded by. Standing beside her was Ashley fucking Purdy, who was sheepishly taking a swig of the dark ale he had in his hand. I felt my face grow hit as the rage built. I looked around, Jake, CC, and Ella were here. "God damnit! You fucking planned this didn't you?!" I yelled at Siren. "I told you not to involve me in anything. So this who you've been fucking texting since we went to Indiapolis. Glad your happy Siren! Maybe they can fly you home because I'm taking the fucking car and going HOME!!"

I turned on stomped off. I was seething with such anger that my hands, balled into fists now, were shaking. I felt like I could either break down crying in a huddled mass on the floor or Punch through a fucking metal wall. I was in eyesight of the door when suddenly a mic feedback cut over all the talking. I stopped and looked up to the stage on the far side.
Someone was standing on the stage. "Hey there everyone! We are about to get this party started at the 2013 Vans Warped Tour Celebration! We want to acknowledge all the wonderful bands and supporters of the tour this evening, but we will saving all of the talking for the end. Right now, please welcome William Control, who will be working and spinning the tracks tonight. Let's have a blast tonight!"

Oh no wonder I'm here. Ashley wanted a date for himself and Siren didn't want to leave me home alone. So fucking considerate given my circumstances. I pulled out my phone text Clayton, I need to calm down. I need to calm down. I'm going to panic. My breathing was so rapid I was about to hyperventilate. My mind was everywhere and I couldn't make sense of anything. I didn't even know what to say as I started blankly at my new text screen, my hands trembling. I had nothing written. I'll give up and just call him, his voice will be enough to calm me. I exited texts and scrolled for his name in my contact list. My thumb hovered over the call button. A hand wrapped around my forearm, carefully turning me. It was Andy.
"What do you want?" I growled.
He looked down at my face, confusion in those eyes. "Will you please talk to me?"
"Oh so now you want to talk? Is your girlfriend gone? Now you want to talk?" The anger spilled out in my words. I felt the tears well up in my eyes, but I blinked them back. He still carefully held my forearm. I jerked it away from him and glared up to his face.
"Can we please talk? Privately?"
"You get five minutes then I'm fucking gone Biersack."

He nodded understanding and led me out a side door and we walked down to a small lounge area that was desterted. I sat a seat away from him on the couch. I put my heels on the floor next to me and looked at him. "What?" I said sharply.
He pulled in a ragged breath. "Reya, please just listen to me. I've welled this up for a year now, and I need to tell you this." He seemed to be searching for the right words as he stared blankly at the couch cushion between us. "I never meant to kiss Juliet," he looked directly in my eyes. "She kissed me in front of the trailer. I wasn't expecting it. I just hugged her and she kissed me and wouldn't let go of my with her death grip. I'm so sorry, Reya. I never intended to hurt you. I never knew anyone even saw until later in the day when Jinxx and Jake got ahold of each other and Jake showed me on twitter. My phone had been left on accident in the bus, and I'm positive Juliet was the one who was texting you from my phone that morning since she was in our bus with our manager."
His gaze dropped and he looked away, I could see the pain and tears mixing in his eyes. "Whe-when you sent me that picture that night...Reya I cried myself to sleep that night. I saw your arm bleeding and the pain, disappointment, anger..the suffering in you. I wanted to kill myself knowing how much pain I inflicted to you. I didn't know where you were and you cut off all contact. Reya, when that happened I did two things. I fucked up my life and I fucked up yours. I drank every night till I was so poisoned I couldn't even stand or be even close to coherent. I had no one and when I got drunk enough I gave into Juliet." He looked back to my face, "I'm not saying this to anger or hurt you. You have a right now know." He averted his eyes again, and hunch over his knees, resting his elbows on his thighs. "I stayed with her because I needed some type of help, and being with her kept me occupied and helped me not be so lonely anymore. I was drunk throughout most of the relationship. No matter how intoxicated I got, I never could quite drink the pain away. I could ease or numb it, but Reya, when you left...it was like a hollow hole through my chest was opened." A single tear fell from his eye, leaving a light grey color as it bled with his eyeliner. "I was completely wasted a few weeks ago when Ashley slapped me in the face, quite literally. He told me to get my act together. Shortly after that, Juliet left me."
"I...I-I'm sorry," I whispered. I had no other idea of what to say.
"Don't be. I knew it was coming and wasn't fazed. It was for the better. Reya, I can't get you out of my head. I could swore I thought you were a ghost or I was dreaming or delusional in the party earlier. I followed you just when I saw you from the back, but when I realized it was you? I couldn't let you leave. I had to tell you this. You had to know." He wiped away another tear.

I held my head down in shame. "I'm sorry, Andy."
He sat up. "Would you mind sharing your thoughts"? I looked up through my bangs at him, his eyes pleading to know.
I sighed loudly, feeling my chest depress. "Be prepared for this." I couldn't look him in the eyes, I was too ashamed of myself. "When I saw the pictures I was so hurt, I went to my bathroom, trying to just calm down. The angry and evil thoughts filled my head, telling me I was useless, worthless, unloved, ugly. I gave into them and seeked the blade. I cut so many times, more than I ever have in one sitting, all of them deep. I covered them and then you called me. I was so furious and hurt and confused and..I-I..." I choked on my words. "I wanted to die so badly, Andy. I was supposed to see you," I said as I looked uo at him, the tears finally spilling over my eye lids. "We were only a few days apart from my warped date, Andy. I had to move out of Brandon's and I went with Siren. We attend the Art Institute together and got an apartment. I couldn't stop cutting. It became an every day thing."

Andy reached out to me, grabbing my hands. He scooted closer and turned over my hands, pulling back all of my wristbands. I had on so many he just had to remove them. I wiped my eyes and pulled them all off. He was frozen as he took them in. They were from wrist to elbow on both arms. Angry, white, purple, and pink raised scars.
"Andy, I wanted to die more than ever. I never told anyone, but I was so suicidal. I found out one of my punk pop band friends was coming to Florida so I hung out with them and..well I started dating the lead guitarist, Clayton Collins. I stopped when we started dating in mid December, I've been clean for almost eight months now for him."
"Oh, so...yo-you're happy...with him?" he asked, his voice cracking.
"No one will ever compare to you Andy," I whispered, my own voice breaking.

He painfully smiled. Raising a hand to wipe under my eyes he stared into my eyes. Why does this have to be so painful? I suddenly realized the lobby music. Fall for You...
"Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you,
Over again, don't make me change my mind.
I wont live to see another day, I swear it's true.
Because a girl like you is impossible to find. Impossible to find."

Andy pulled me into a careful hug. My god, I'd missed these so badly, these warm tattooed arms around me. We silently cried together, drinking in each others pain, more like drowning.
"Come on, let's stop the sob fest," I forceably laughed.
I pulled out a small mirror from my purse and redid my eyeliner and mascara, wiping away the black streaks. Andy borrowed it to fix his eyeliner.

We decided to go and join the party, at least have some enjoyment in this night. I followed him back into the venue, it was dark and music was blasting from the wall of speakers on the floor in front of the stage. We walked to the dance floor, finding Siren and Ashley grinding. Well we knew who set this up. We danced around to Fall Out Boy, Green Day, Breathe Carolina, and some other unknown music Will played as club music. We jumped around and head banged with some other people like Kellin and Vic. They must have recognized me at first because they gave Andy a really weird look. Oh well, I don't give a fuck tonight. The lights strobes from the ceiling and rack on the stage behind the DJ booth. The floor was pounding with the bass and it forced your heart to pound with it. I could even feel it through my bare feet as we all bounced around.
I felt myself finally smiling, actually enjoying myself. I even had a drink when I saw an orange drink go by. It was 7up, orange juice and a touch of vodka. It was fucking delicious. I gave it back to the another passing waiter. Andy didn't drink anything, which was ok since he told me about his alcohol reliance.
Vic, Jack, and Jaime we all with us and Kellin bounced around between or group and another. I couldn't help but laugh when Matt Good and Danny stumbled over to us, completely wasted. They were drunkenly singing completely off key and wobbling. Matt went to do a mosh jump and when he did he fell face first onto the the floor, taking Danny with him, who slipped and fell onto his back. I was dying of laughter and even found myself leaning on Andy to stop from joining them on the floor in laughter. We were all laughing and giggling when the lights slowly stopped strobing, and the lights were now just softly lit and the twinkle lights around the large hall came on.
The speakers played an acoustic guitar, and Andy held his hand out to me. I figured one slow dance wouldn't kill me. I placed mine in his and he carefully put a hand on my mid back and pulled me a bit closer. I had put my heels back on, and I gently swayed back and forth with him, a little buzzed from the alcohol.

"Well hey, darling, I hope you're good tonight. And I know you don't feel right when I'm leaving. Yeah, I want it, but no I don't need it. Tell me something sweet to get me by. Cause I can't come back home til they're singing La, la, la, la, la, la, la. Till everybody's singing."

I found myself stepping a little closer to Andy as we swished side to side. I took my hand out of his and instead out both arms around his neck.

"If you can wait till I get home, then I swear to you that we can make this last. La, la, la. If you can wait till I get home, then I swear come tomorrow this will all be in our past. Well, it might be for the best." The voice switched to a women's. "And hey, sweetie. Well, I need you here tonight. And yeah I know that you dont want to believe it. Yeah, you want it, but I can't help it. I just feel complete when you're by my side. but I know that you can't come back home til they're singing. La, la, la, la, la, la, la. Till everybody's singing. La, la, la, la, la, la, la."

Andy pulled me closer, and rested his forehead against mine. His hands slowly fell from my ribs to the small of my back.

"if you could wait till I get home, then I swear to you that we could make this last. la, la, la. If you can wait till I get home, then I swear come tomorrow this will all be in our past. Well it might be for the best." The woman's voice came back. "I know you can't give me what I need, and even though you mean so much to me, I can't wait through everything."

I pulled my forehead away from Andy's, and instead rested my head against his shoudler, tucking it into his neck with my eyes closed. I wrapped my arms under his armpits,locking my hands around his back. Our body's were right against each others as the male voice returned to the track.

"Is this really happening? I swear I'll never be happy again. And don't you dare you say we can just be friends, I'm not some boy that you can sway. We knew it'd happen eventually."

We remained wrapped in each others arms as the chorus replayed and the gang vocals slowly faded out. The familiar feeling of his arms, my head against his shoulder and chest, the sweet smell of his cologne and shampoo made the euphoria in me even more intense. I reluctantly opened my eyes but we didn't let go. I could see Kellin Quinn and his wife holding each other the same way a few feet away. Ash and Siren were kissing as another slow song came on. It was familiar. I couldn't quite think of it.

"Waking up alone again. You're somewhere next to him. This empty bed is nothing new. Now it all starts making sense. It's no coincedence. The one mistake I made was you. And now I, I won't take it, not one more night, I'm gonna learn to live without you. You won't make it out on your own. You can't break me down, this time I know. I don't need you now. I'll do it alone. All the lies you live, brought me to my knees, so I won't forgive what you've done to me. Now there's no turning back, caught right in the act, can't do a thing about it now. Don't know how you can say, he treats you better than me, when I gave up everything for you. "

It suddenly hit me. I heard this song a short while ago when I was upset and thinking about Andy. I had cried myself to sleep that night. I had burst into tears when I heard this song, the perfect explanation of how I felt.

"After all this time, I can't believe that. You could stand to watch me burn. I know every night, you'll think of me and where we've been."

I felt Andy tense. I took my head off this shoulder and looked into his eyes. I searched for any reason why, and he seemed to be doing the same. Am I lying to myself about my feelings for him? After all of this time, is my heart still clinging to him?
"I still love you," we whsipered in usinson.

Notes

There ya go. Much more tension to come so don't put away the tissues yet!!!
I hope you guys got the gushy stuff you wanted, I seriously was crying while I wrote this.

The two songs are-
If it Means a Lot to You by A Day to Remember
Alone by MevsGravity

COMMENT PLEASE!(: