Freedom in the Night
How do I put this?
I laid back, and took a deep breath. I stared at my ceiling, and just replayed everything that happened today.
1- I trust Andy.
2- I lied to Jinxx.
3- I've completely decided not to eat anymore, and when I do, to loose it.
4- I realized how bad I want my mommy and daddy today.
5- I'm gonna have to start trusting Jinxx.
I sighed gain and rubbed my arm. Sore. At least I won't die or have to get a skin graph or feel like shit anymore, which is very good. All I need to do now is get skinny. I rolled up my sweatshirtsleeve to look at my arm. The skin around the outside of the bandages was really red, from the infection, and my arm was still very swollen, and it was warm to the touch. I texted Andy,
Me: Hey, can you bring me an ice pack?
Andy: Sure, no problem.
I took my sweatshirt off, knowing it would just be Andy coming in, and so I let my guard down. I walked over to the window, and actually used the little niche. I climbed in, and laid on the pillows, and snuggled under a blanket I found, I looked outside and enjoyed the sunset. I put my earbuds in and listened to Carolyn on a loop. I got about half-way through it, when I felt a hand on my back. I turned around, expecting to see Andy, but I was surprised to see a disappointed Jinxx glaring down at me. I pulled my earbuds out and looked at him. He held an ice pack in one hand, and held out the other. I took his free hand, we walked over to my bed, and we sat down. He looked at my arm, and he rubbed the bandages, and laid the ice pack over my arm. "Audrey..." He held my hand, and rubbed it with his thumb. "Why?" I shrugged my shoulders..."I missed it..and it helps, so much. I need it I can't live without doing it." Jinxx shook his head. "No! No you don't! I'm not gonna loose you. I can't! Why didn't you tell me the day I picked you up?" I shrugged, "I didn't want you to think I was a freak, and I didn't and don't want to stop. I just want to be able to function again because I can't because my parents are gone!" I screamed at him and started crying like crazy. Jinxx pulled me into his arms, "Shhh baby please it's okay...I know it hurts and you miss them but I'm here and I can't loose you again! I love you Audrey. Last year when you nearly killed yourself I was there everyday until our tour manager made me leave. I'm not gonna almost loose you. You mean too much to me." He kissed my hair and pulled me in as tight to him as he possibly could. I cried and clung to him tighter. "Please honey, just tell me these things. I care about you, and I want to help you. I don't want to loose you." He kissed my forhead. "Please Audrey...fight this for me. Please." I nodded, and I clung to him tighter. "I promise, I'm never going to give up on you or let you down. And Sammi is here for you and so are the rest of the guys." I shook my head "No...I don't to tell them yet. I'm scare to. I mean, yeah Andy knows, so I mean...but Sammi, and the other 3 guys...I don't want them to hate me." Jinxx rubbed my hair, "They won't, but I understand..But I am going to have to tell Sammi..." I sighed..."Do you have to?" He nodded, "She's my wife Audrey..I have to." I buried my face in his chest. "I'm sorry I screamed at you Jinxx.." He laughed, "It's fine honey. I understand." I sat on my bed, and put the ice pack back on my arm. He rubbed my back. "Do you want to watch a movie with us, or do you want to stay up here?" No people scare me I just want to be alone. "I just want to stay up here." He sighed. "Alright, well you have our numbers if you need someone. I can go get you some Melatonin to help you sleep, if you'd like." I shook my head. "No, I'm fine." He smiled. There was a knock on my door. "Come in." Jinxx called. It was Andy. "Hey, I need to give you your medicine." I sighed, and flopped back onto my bed. "Jinxx I'm gonna need you to stay in here because I have to give her a shot." My whole body stiffened, and I groaned. Jinxx pulled me into his lap, and I shut my eyes. Andy unwrapped the bandages, and wiped off the cuts, but put more ointment on. "Okay.." Jinxx held me tighter. "One......Two....Three!" I felt the sharp pain of the needle as he gave me the shot. He finished up, and then wrapped my arm. I took my pain killers, and then they made me go downstairs to give everyone their goodnight hugs. I walked into the living room, and was instantly greeted by CC who shouted "She lives!" and who picked me up in a hug and spun me around. Ashley gave me a hug, and kissed my cheek, and ruffled my hair. Jake of course just smiled and hugged me, but it was a very tight hug, almost like he knew something was up. I walked into the kitchen, where I found Sammi (of course) making tea. She gave me a hug, and told me to have sweet dreams. Jinxx and Andy walked me back up to my room again. Jinxx hugged me and kissed my cheek, and told me he loved me. But Andy hung around for a while. We talked, cuddled, and all that sweet stuff. He started singing Saviour, and I swear...I've never been so happy. I fell asleep to the sound of Saviour being sung by Andy, and his arms wrapped around me.
1- I trust Andy.
2- I lied to Jinxx.
3- I've completely decided not to eat anymore, and when I do, to loose it.
4- I realized how bad I want my mommy and daddy today.
5- I'm gonna have to start trusting Jinxx.
I sighed gain and rubbed my arm. Sore. At least I won't die or have to get a skin graph or feel like shit anymore, which is very good. All I need to do now is get skinny. I rolled up my sweatshirtsleeve to look at my arm. The skin around the outside of the bandages was really red, from the infection, and my arm was still very swollen, and it was warm to the touch. I texted Andy,
Me: Hey, can you bring me an ice pack?
Andy: Sure, no problem.
I took my sweatshirt off, knowing it would just be Andy coming in, and so I let my guard down. I walked over to the window, and actually used the little niche. I climbed in, and laid on the pillows, and snuggled under a blanket I found, I looked outside and enjoyed the sunset. I put my earbuds in and listened to Carolyn on a loop. I got about half-way through it, when I felt a hand on my back. I turned around, expecting to see Andy, but I was surprised to see a disappointed Jinxx glaring down at me. I pulled my earbuds out and looked at him. He held an ice pack in one hand, and held out the other. I took his free hand, we walked over to my bed, and we sat down. He looked at my arm, and he rubbed the bandages, and laid the ice pack over my arm. "Audrey..." He held my hand, and rubbed it with his thumb. "Why?" I shrugged my shoulders..."I missed it..and it helps, so much. I need it I can't live without doing it." Jinxx shook his head. "No! No you don't! I'm not gonna loose you. I can't! Why didn't you tell me the day I picked you up?" I shrugged, "I didn't want you to think I was a freak, and I didn't and don't want to stop. I just want to be able to function again because I can't because my parents are gone!" I screamed at him and started crying like crazy. Jinxx pulled me into his arms, "Shhh baby please it's okay...I know it hurts and you miss them but I'm here and I can't loose you again! I love you Audrey. Last year when you nearly killed yourself I was there everyday until our tour manager made me leave. I'm not gonna almost loose you. You mean too much to me." He kissed my hair and pulled me in as tight to him as he possibly could. I cried and clung to him tighter. "Please honey, just tell me these things. I care about you, and I want to help you. I don't want to loose you." He kissed my forhead. "Please Audrey...fight this for me. Please." I nodded, and I clung to him tighter. "I promise, I'm never going to give up on you or let you down. And Sammi is here for you and so are the rest of the guys." I shook my head "No...I don't to tell them yet. I'm scare to. I mean, yeah Andy knows, so I mean...but Sammi, and the other 3 guys...I don't want them to hate me." Jinxx rubbed my hair, "They won't, but I understand..But I am going to have to tell Sammi..." I sighed..."Do you have to?" He nodded, "She's my wife Audrey..I have to." I buried my face in his chest. "I'm sorry I screamed at you Jinxx.." He laughed, "It's fine honey. I understand." I sat on my bed, and put the ice pack back on my arm. He rubbed my back. "Do you want to watch a movie with us, or do you want to stay up here?" No people scare me I just want to be alone. "I just want to stay up here." He sighed. "Alright, well you have our numbers if you need someone. I can go get you some Melatonin to help you sleep, if you'd like." I shook my head. "No, I'm fine." He smiled. There was a knock on my door. "Come in." Jinxx called. It was Andy. "Hey, I need to give you your medicine." I sighed, and flopped back onto my bed. "Jinxx I'm gonna need you to stay in here because I have to give her a shot." My whole body stiffened, and I groaned. Jinxx pulled me into his lap, and I shut my eyes. Andy unwrapped the bandages, and wiped off the cuts, but put more ointment on. "Okay.." Jinxx held me tighter. "One......Two....Three!" I felt the sharp pain of the needle as he gave me the shot. He finished up, and then wrapped my arm. I took my pain killers, and then they made me go downstairs to give everyone their goodnight hugs. I walked into the living room, and was instantly greeted by CC who shouted "She lives!" and who picked me up in a hug and spun me around. Ashley gave me a hug, and kissed my cheek, and ruffled my hair. Jake of course just smiled and hugged me, but it was a very tight hug, almost like he knew something was up. I walked into the kitchen, where I found Sammi (of course) making tea. She gave me a hug, and told me to have sweet dreams. Jinxx and Andy walked me back up to my room again. Jinxx hugged me and kissed my cheek, and told me he loved me. But Andy hung around for a while. We talked, cuddled, and all that sweet stuff. He started singing Saviour, and I swear...I've never been so happy. I fell asleep to the sound of Saviour being sung by Andy, and his arms wrapped around me.
You depicted Andy as quite the asshole in the last chapter, especially considering that blonde character was a stupid-ass bitch — who should've been more of a one-night stand, if anything else. But what you did certainly adds a good bit
of drama that makes me want to keep reading to see what happens to Audrey
4/20/15