Consume Me

Ashley is really weird lately, he hasn't seen a bimbo in two weeks, it's strange, usually it's like, 5 times a week if not 5 times a day. That is what he always says, "I like beautiful girls and motorbikes", I am sure he likes one more than the other, because he sure spends more time with girls than motorbikes. But, that's none of my business, I guess.
Ashley is this guy that is really sweet and you can't talk about anything with him, like seriously anything. I talk with him a lot, and sometimes I tell him things that I don't tell Andy, it even happened that I talked with Ashley about my first time with a boy. I don't how this shit happened, but it did, I just felt like I was meant to tell him that, that he was supposed to know. But anyway, my first time wasn't that good anyway, it was with a guy I didn't even knew and I was drunk. And the guy puked on me after it. I know, disgusting. I was 16 and stupid. I realize that I have no shame talking about that now, maybe because I am laughing thinking about it.
Ashley left the couch while I was laughing alone thinking about my adventures, he is now sitting in front of me.
"Why are you laughing? He asks
-Remember that guy of my first time? Well i was just thinking about this and it made me laugh, it is miserable I know.
-No it's not, don't worry. He smiles, we stay like that staring at each other for a few minutes. It is awkward.
-S-so, no more hanging out with girls? I am trying to break the silence.
-Well, not on tour.
-Really? On tour is when you see a lot of girls generally, way more than usual.
-Well yes, but not this time, I don't know I don't feel like hanging out with girls.
-Alright. Fine." I smile, what made him change like this? I know the guys too well. Am I becoming their mom? I really don't need to be like that.
"Are you okay?" Ashley asks me. Good question. Do I tell him that I am not feeling great at all, that I wanna go home or do I lie. You know the answer.
"I feel great, I am happy to be on tour with you guys." It's the first day of the tour, I don't wanna be annoying and kill the joy.


Everybody went to sleep, it's 3 AM and I can't sleep. I am sitting in one of the couch, earphones in my ears, listening to Paramore. I've met this band once and they are amazing people, I really like them, sometimes I and Hayley are still talking and we may meet each other again at warped tour. I respect tham a lot.
I am starting to hear some noise from the bunk area, someone is coming towards me. It's Andy.
"What are you doing? You are supposed to sleep?
-What are YOU doing? I didn't ask anything you can go back to sleep. Me and my humour, such a great couple.
-Come on stop being so depressed, we are on tour and we are supposed to do fun things!
-I know, give me the night and tomorrow I'll be in shape.
-Perfect, good night. He kisses my forehead and goes back to his bunk bed.

I obviously spend the night awake, trying to figure out my life and when the boys wakes up, one by one, they are all surprised to see me there "Hey already awake?" they all ask, no see I am sleeping right now don't disturb me. Me and my humour part 2. We decided to stop at a restaurant for taking breakfast, and I had to get ready super fast, I was kinda ashamed of getting out of the bus, my clothes weren't so clean, it was definitely not a look for a restaurant. We entered the restaurant and sat at a table, the food was already set up and all, there was a lot of food, sounds like paradise.
We all start eating and I making my best laughing and talking with the boys, I am still not feeling so great, but better, and I guess that I'm gonna regret my sleepless night and probably be in a killer mood at the end of the day, but it's fine. Andy keeps staring at me, he is happy. During this breakfast, I really felt like I belonged with this guy, you know, like a family.

During this breakfast, I finally forgot about my mother.

Notes

I received one cool comment from a nice girl, it made my day, thanks, I'll keep writing.
Don't forget that you are amazing and don't let anything or anyone take you down, I am trying to bring a little happiness with my story so I hope you like it.