After Life

She looked at me as though that was the end of the story, that she had explained everything. I sighed internally- (Y/N) was just impossible at times! “Well? What happened then? How did you get here?”

That was met with a snort. “I walked! Took me days! What, did you think I’d me own carriage?” Her laughter was sharp and brief. “I was robbed o’the little bit of bread an cheese I’d stolen, barely escaped with me life an what was left o’me honor. I had to beg for a place to sleep. For food an drink I had to barter the clothes off me back.” The idea of (Y/N) newly pregnant and alone filled me with a desire for vengeance upon Fancy that I knew I could never appease.

I shook my head to clear it of my turbid emotions. Though she had most definitely soured on sharing her story, I still wasn’t sure how it ended with her dead in my woods. “That is terrible and undeserved, but I don’t understand the whole of the picture. Could you… or would you, if you wouldn’t mind, clarify a-“

She sighed heavily. “Alright, alright! I thought that Fancy was just in a bit o’shock, that he’d accidentally forgotten me, or that he’d be back soon. But a week an a half passed with nothing. I was such a fool- so, so stupid.” For just a moment, she looked as weary as though she held the weight of the world on her shoulders. “So I set off after him, just as I said, figuring he’d just need to see me to remember that he loved me, that we were going to get married, that we’d made a baby together.”

There was a long pause, but I didn’t interrupt. (Y/N) seemed to be uncomfortable with reliving it all, and I didn’t want to say anything further that might irritate her enough such that she’d just run off again. I resolved not to pressure her to finish; it was awful to see her pretty face so fallen. I was acutely aware of the sounds of the night around us as I waited.

“So I got ‘ere,” again she pointed to my castle, “in the middle o’the night ‘an just made as though I were a new serving hand. Bein’ in me shift, I got a few strange looks, but no one cared enough to hassle me. It was black as pitch out, but eventually I was able to find a servant entrance an make me way in.” Images of my home, back when it had been lived in, floated through my mind. How long ago had this been? I hoped I remembered to ask on some other occasion.

Once again I was embarrassed when I realized I hadn’t been paying attention. “…surprised to find him there, arguing with his old man. I know it weren’t very smart, but the moment I saw him, I lost me sense. I ran right up to him, right there in front o’Sir Hemley, an started crying me eyes out.” When I heard that name, a flutter of surprise ran through me. It was familiar! I couldn’t immediately place it, but my gut told me to remember it and think on it later.

“I don’t remember exactly what I said, but I told Fancy I loved him, asked him how he could leave me when he’d put a baby in me, all the sort o’things that you’d imagine a hysterical, newly expecting, lovesick woman who’d just walked for days‘d say. I do remember how thirsty I was, how hungry an’ desperate, just like it was yesterday… but they both just stared at me…”

When she trailed off, her face fallen and her eyes glassy with unshed tears, the sight drove me to say something utterly counterproductive for some reason. “You don’t have to go on if it’s, er, if it’s hurtf-“

She sniffled and interrupted me, “Nah, it’s good to talk, healthy.” She cleared her throat, “well, after plenty o’staring, Sir Hemley gives this big groan, grabs Fancy by the arm, an gives him this real long, stern speech. He tells him that he’s an embarrassment through an through. That he weren’t following the family tradition o’service to the crown, that he was a disappointment an a failure an whatnot. Then he says Fancy’s pathetic for letting ‘this’ happen, an he pointed at me, sayin’ that he shoulda gotten me settled, that he was ashamed o’him. Then he gives Fancy’s arm a shake, an says that they’re leaving for home right then, that he won’t spend another night ‘ere, and that Fancy’d best square up with me, get me set up fast, an then come with him or he’d be ousted, something like that. I didn’t understand it all, an there was more to it, but Fancy was real quiet an still as his father stormed off, calling for a carriage.”

I felt a sort of squiggle in my incorporeal stomach. This sounded so familiar. Hemley…Hemley…

She shook her head, “I shoulda known something was terribly wrong, as Fancy always had a quiet moment afore he got real angry, but I didn’t e’en think o’that. I just went right up to him an took his hand, told him I’d go ahead and follow wherever he went, just so long as we were together. So he looks at me an smiles this big smile, an it makes me feel like everything’d be alright. An he says to me that he knew I would come an that he’s ready to marry, right then an there. My heart was racin’; I was so excited. I was so exhausted, worn down to nothing, an I thought that it’d all been worth it…”

She grunted, looking suddenly irritated, “I’m sure you can piece the rest together.”

I was afraid to reply, that I would say the wrong thing and be hurtful. “You didn’t get married?” It was a stupid question, but the only thing that I could think to say.

She rolled her eyes, “No, are ye soft in the head? He had me take his arm, an he walked me out to the ‘chapel in the woods,’ an by that I mean that I believed him up until the moment he threw me to the ground an started choking the life outta me. I fought some, but me heart wasn’t in it, it broke an died the moment he started crushing me throat in his hands.

“After I’m dead, he just stared down at my body for a long while, huffing an puffing, an then he spits on me! He calls me a disgusting trollop, a daggle-tailed puterelle, a rotten peasant that’d do anything for a yard- he went on an on.” I flinched when she said ‘peasant’- the same word I had used for her. “How could I dare to follow him, harass him, embarrass him in front of his father. He was screaming an spit was flying outta his mouth, an I just watched it all from the side, real confused an feelin funny- not really connecting that I was dead. I’d ruined everything, he said. He e’en said he hated me singin’ all along.

“Then he calmed down a bit and laughed. He kicked leaves o’er me, saying that I didn’t deserve a grave, that now he was finally rid o’me, an that he’d find another doxy to spread ‘er legs for him.” She looked distant for a moment before shaking her head.

“So that was that. I was dead an no one ever looked for me, I imagine.” She cocked her head, “well, I suppose it wouldn’t have mattered if they did, I got ate up by animals right quick.”

And as she went on to describe what sort of forest creature had eaten what body part and what direction each bone had gone in, everything congealed in my mind. I had known of a mercantile family named Hemley back when I was alive. Their audacity at building a bell tower when they weren’t members of the gentry had driven me mad until I had verified that their bell was smaller than mine.

That same family had a son, a bit younger than I, who had gone on to serve as a knighted statesman- that had to be the Sir Hemley (Y/N) spoke of! When the baron who had murdered me had appointed Sir Hemley to direct my estate in his absence, I had lost my temper. A mere merchant, knighted or not, slept in my chambers?! One foggy, dark night, I had manifested to the man and thrown my head at him, driving him away within hours. It had been one of my first and greatest victories as a dead man.

But if that was the case, I had petrified the elder Hemley the very night that (Y/N) had made her plea to Fancy. Fancy had been incensed by his treatment by his father and promptly murdered (Y/N). Perhaps, if I had not terrorized Sir Hemley, he would not have treated his son as he did. Perhaps, if I had held my temper, (Y/N) would not have been murdered.

Notes

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