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Connections

Four

My first few days at the studio goes by like a dream. It turns out my mediator personality when it comes to group work is super helpful, since Andy and Ashley sometimes clash on lyrics. John is like that too, and together we usually come up with a suggestion that’s better for the song as a whole.

Today we’re starting tracking on drums, and CC is a fucking maniac when it comes to drumming! He goes nuts and occasionally does these fills that make you want to headbang until your head falls off. I usually go in before him to make sure everything sounds okay before recording, and I’ll move the mics or whatever as John asks. He’s even letting me help watch the soundboard and to tweak it as needed.

Every couple hours or so, I text my grandma and ask her about Davey and how he’s doing, and he’s always okay. It’s been sort of rough on him the last week because I’ve been gone so much. When I come home at night he runs to me and hugs me super tight. He’s been getting along with Grandma better and better every day, but he still trusts me the most.

It’s difficult trying to balance these two lives. While I sit here, rocking out and having fun with seven other dudes and making music, my little brother is at home waiting for me. While I know that it’s normal to not see your guardian for a number of hours for school or they’re at work or whatever it may be, he doesn’t have any friends here. It’s been almost a month but we’re just getting into summer. He won’t be able to meet many kids until school starts in August.

And how would I even do that? I don’t have Davey’s birth certificate, hell I don’t even know his social security number! I could ask around (I know a few people) and get one doctored, but even then how long would that last until they figured it out? Could I homeschool him? Maybe I could look into that, and see what that requires. Even if I did, he still wouldn’t be getting out much to meet other kids. I can’t keep him cooped up forever, it’s not good for a kid!

I’m taken from my thoughts as John asks me to raise one of the equalizers a bit. When I do, he asks if I’m okay and I just nod and try to focus on CC.

The guys have all been super friendly. Not all of them are here today, only CC, Andy, and Jinxx. Jinxx wants to be in on the conversation a lot, and I get the sense he’s feeling out how the song is going to sound before he tracks his rhythm guitar. Andy is sort of enamored by the technology, but I can tell he doesn’t have much better to do than sit and talk about music. Occasionally he doodles or goes out to smoke and write songs, but he typically just watches CC do his thing or us manage the sound.

Andy has actually been sort of awkward around me lately. We generally greet each other in the morning and after that it’s just quiet with us. He looks at me a lot when I’m working, and sometimes when he’s on his phone or we’re taking a break I look at him too. I mean, I think he’s cute, but I know that nothing will come of that. It’s not like I’m in love with him; I barely even know him! And even if he had feelings for me I wouldn’t act on them. I already have a boy in my life, and I’m not letting anything come between us.

Finally, the day ends. We have three drums completely mixed and finished and ready for the bass or guitar to go over them, whichever goes first tomorrow. We’re also recording a demo tomorrow for some song they figured out last week.

We start packing up and shutting down, and I take a minute outside to call my grandma and tell her I’m leaving in just a minute. When I get back in, Jinxx and CC are gone and John and Andy are talking about some other project that’s been mentioned a few times called “Andy Black”. I looked that up too, after listening to the other records Black Veil Brides have done, and it’s way different but I like it. It’s weird knowing he has more depth to him. It makes him more real.

Well all sort of say our goodbyes to each other as John turns the lights off. When we’re all about to walk out, Feldy says he forgot something and turns back. I wait to be polite, but Andy keeps going. He looks back at me and says, “Don’t wait up. That was his way of telling me to flirt.”

I raise an eyebrow. “What?”

He chuckles and takes a step back towards me. “I don’t really have game. I think you’re beautiful, and I told him that, and this is his way of forcing me to flirt with you. The only option I have is being blunt.”

Oh. I don’t know what to say. I feel myself blushing, and I look down to hide it. “Uh, thank you,” I say, starting to walk again. He meets my slow stride. “I, um... Well...”

“You have a boyfriend,” he tries. “I figured, since you text him all the time.”

“No!” I violently shake my head and start laughing. “No, I don’t have a boyfriend. I have a little brother.”

“Oh.” It’s his turn to figure out what to say. We both exit, Andy holding the door open for me, and start walking to our cars.

“And, while I think you’re attractive, ‘cause you are,” --I see him smiling, “I’m not really looking for a relationship, serious or not, right now. This and Davey are taking up most of my time.” I stop in front of my car, and so he stops too.

“Davey is the kid that Jake went over to check on?” he asks.

“Yeah.” I nod, wondering if he would judge me for that. Would it matter though? I guess so, since I feel my chest tightening.

“Well, I’m glad Jake found you and you work with us. You’re really helpful and really even out everybody.” He clears his throat and look around. “Um, I don’t think going out for dinner would start a relationship, would it?”

He’s making this really hard. “I don’t know, Andy,” I mumbled. “Right now isn’t really the best time.”

“I didn’t mean right this second,” he states.

“I know you didn’t. I mean this general time period.” I sigh and look down, deciding to reveal a bit to maybe scare him off. “I’ve recently become Davey’s guardian, and right now I’m really stressed trying to balance keeping him happy and not anxious all the time while I’m working here. And don’t get me wrong, I love working with you guys. Just right now I don’t know if Davey or I could handle me having a boyfriend, and I have to think about him too.”

“Oh.” He sighs and looks down.

My chest seizes again. God, I don’t want to hurt him! Apparently I like him more than I think I like him. I shake my hair out. “If you asked me at any other time, Andy, I’d say yes. You’re funny and super smart and so talented and you’re pretty much exactly what I look for. I really want to. I just can’t.”

He looks up at me as I say all this, and when I finish he nods. “Well, I guess I can wait. Unless that’s weird, of course.” We both laugh a little. He takes my hand and kisses the top of it before saying, “Get home safe, Mina.” Then, he turns and walks away and to his car.

I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding when I slide into my own car. God, if this were two months ago I would’ve had a totally different attitude towards him. I really wish I could date him, that wasn’t a lie. But not knowing what to do with Davey half the time really scares me already, and I don’t need a relationship adding to my stress levels. I really hope Andy understood that.

I try to forget about it as I drive home, but every time I look at my left hand on the steering wheel my heart flutters and I think about how cold his hand was when he took mine and soft his lips were on the back of it. God, why did the universe take all of the best and brightest stars and put them into one body? I’m just glad that it’s the weekend and we have a couple days apart, so it won’t be super awkward tomorrow.

When I get home, Davey and Grandma surprise me with home-cooked chicken alfredo, my favorite. At the dinner table, Davey tells me all about how Grandma let him get on the computer (supervised of course) and look up this recipe, and how they went to the store to get everything and she let him pay for it. He got to boil the noodles and help make the sauce, but Grandma made the chicken. It’s delicious and knowing they did this to surprise me makes me so happy.

It’s as Grandma is getting ready to leave that I hear three knocks on the door. I’m no fool; I didn’t invite anyone else over and you’d have to know the building key and my apartment number to be able to knock on my door. My dad knew it before he got locked up, but I asked that the building key be changed for that very reason. I don’t want his druggie friends hitting me up for the money he has stashed away. I tell Davey to go to our room, and he reluctantly complies. The knocking continues.

I don’t have a peep hole in my door, so immediately I’m more tense. My grandma walks over and asks, “Do you think it’s one of Parker’s friends?”

“I don’t know. Wouldn’t be the first time,” I answer. This feels different though. In my gut, I know it’s not them.

My grandma holds my hand and says she’ll be with Davey to keep him calm, and when she lets go I have a small metal object in my palm. When I examine it, it’s pepper spray. Where’d Grandma get fucking pepper spray? Regardless, I hold it in the right position for use if I need it and keep the chain on my door, sliding the deadbolt over.

When I open the door, Sloane Michaels is standing in front of me. My chest tightens.

Sloane doesn’t look upset or angry or happy. She looks annoyed, really. She puts that fake smile on that she used when I met her. “Mina,” she says. “Look at your new hair. How cute.”

“Sloane,” I greet. She looks at the chain expectantly, but I don’t move a muscle. “How did you get into my complex?”

“Oh, funny enough I have an aunt who lives here,” she says, and I can immediately tell it’s a lie. She fucking followed me. She’s been following me. Has she seen Davey? He hasn’t left the house much in the last few days, but if Grandma went to the store today, did Sloane see him?

“Oh. What’s her name? I know most of the tenants here,” I rebuttal, trying to keep my cool.

She clamps her teeth together with her forced grin. “You wouldn’t know her. She’s a recluse up on the eighth floor. Anyway, I was in town and thought I’d drop by. Ask you if you found out anything about your father.”

“No, I didn’t.” I steel my nerves. “I find it sort of weird that you just randomly showed up at my door.”

She shrugs, but her smile falters. “Just noticed you walking in as someone was getting off on this floor. Didn’t mean to scare you.”

And then the blow comes. “Actually, it’s been pretty lonely without Nathan around.”

I tense up, but I try not to show it. “Oh? And where is he?”

“That’s a great question. He went missing almost a month ago,” she replies. She peeks behind my shoulder into the apartment. “Right about after you left,” she continues.

“Are you insinuating something?” I ask.

She meets my eyes, and all I see there is annoyance and anger. “No, of course not. Not unless you know something, since you were in town right about that time.”

“Well, Nathan was a jittery kid. What about Richard? He seemed like he had a tight grip on him,” I say, and my teeth grind into themselves.

All false niceness leaves Sloane when I mention Richard. “Actually, Richard is in town with me. See Nathan was at Richard’s friend’s house when he got up and ran off. I don’t know why he would do that.” She glares at me.

“Yeah, me neither. What do they do at Richard’s friend’s house?” I ask, verbally pushing her.

She clenches her teeth too. “None of your business, Mina.”

I nod, keeping myself level. “Alright then. Well, it was great to see you again. I hope you find Nathan soon.” I start to close the door.

She pushes it back open, sliding her arm through the door. “Listen here, Mina. I know you and him are siblings! I could tell the moment I looked at you. If you took him you better give him back or else!”

I shut the door on her arm, and with a yelp she pulls back and falls to the ground. I look at her. “Don’t you dare try to threaten me. You’re not allowed in my home. Maybe, if you took better care of him, he wouldn’t have ran off.” And with that, I slam the door.

For five long minutes, I hold my ear to the door and wait to hear her leave. She curses a bunch and when she stands she kicks the door, resulting in more curses. I can hear her walk off as she mumbles to herself, and when I hear the elevator ding twice I finally pull myself away.

I lean back against the door and shut my eyes. She knows. She knows where I live, she pretty much knows I have Davey, she knows I’m onto Richard. What the fuck am I going to do?

I hear Grandma as she walks around the corner from the hallway. “Who was that?” she asks, her voice low so Davey can’t hear her.

I didn’t even realize I was crying until I open my eyes. As I wipe my tears I walk towards her. “It was Sloane Michaels, that woman I took Davey from.” Grandma immediately looks concerned. I sniffle. “She said she had family in this building and had seen me get into my apartment when someone else was getting off the elevator, but I know she followed me.”

“Does she know you have Davey?” she asks.

“No, I don’t think so,” I mumble, looking towards my room. The door is shut, so while Davey may have his ear pressed against it he can’t see me cry. “She was heavily insinuating that I know where he is, but I don’t think she’s seen him here yet. God, what am I going to do?” Another sob creeps up on me and I hold my hand over my mouth so Davey won’t hear.

Grandma walks me to my couch and sits me down, brushing hair out of my face and trying to cool me down. While it’s comforting that she’s here to help, there’s nothing that she or I could do to protect him if Sloane finds out. If she finds out she could take him back in a heartbeat and I would be arrested for kidnapping. I don’t care about jail, really; I’ve never wanted to follow in my dad’s footsteps, but for Davey I’d do it in a heartbeat. But if I went to jail and Davey went back to Sloane and Richard, what would they do to him? Would they punish him? And what would Richard’s friends do?

I know how much Davey’s past hurts him and how it affects him. He’s still jumpy and anxious just walking down to 7-11 with me. However, I have to know what happened to him. I can’t keep him safe unless I know what I’m fighting against. He’s my whole world, and I’ll do anything to protect him.

“Have you looked into lawyers yet?” she asks.

I shake my head, sniffling and wiping my face. “No. All I have are the pictures I took of him when we got home. I need to talk to Davey and figure out what happened so I can actually start building a case against Sloane and Richard. I’m just so afraid of hurting Davey.”

“Well, I think you’re right. You should ask him,” she affirms, stroking my hair. I look down at my hands. “Davey has gone through a lot of trauma, that’s true. The only way to actually take him away from all that is getting custody of him, and the only way to do that is going to court. It’s going to be hard on both of you, I’m sure. But, Mina, you’re doing everything you can to make his life better. He loves and trusts you so much. He’ll be okay as long as he’s with you.”

I look at her. She gives me a warm smile and kisses my forehead. “I love you, sweetheart. You’re going to be fine. If you want, you two can stay at my place for a few days until this blows over.”

“No, no, no,” I say, shaking my head. “I don’t want them potentially following us to your house. I don’t want you to have any part in this.”

“Honey, you two are my grandkids,” she says. “I appreciate that, but it’s my job to protect you, not the other way around.” She strokes my hair again. When I look up at her again, she says, “I’ll leave you two to talk. Let me know if you see them at all this weekend, okay? My doors are always open for you two.”

I nod. “Thank you, Grandma. So, so much. I appreciate you being here for us more than anything.”

“I love you,” she murmurs, hugging me. “Stay safe out there, okay? Call me if you need anything. I’m serious.”

“I will,” I say as I walk her out. I watch her as she walks to the elevators and steps in, and as the door is shutting she waves and smiles at me, and I wave back. I look around the hallway, paranoia already setting in, before closing the door behind me and making sure I deadbolt it and that the chain is on.

I look around my apartment as I try to think about what I’m going to say to Davey. I wipe my eyes and use my hands to fan myself so that I don’t look I was crying.

This conversation is going to hurt him so much, however it’s necessary. Even though I let him clean the dirt off, I did take pictures of the bruises and scratches on his body. He was nervous, but I told him just to move the clothes he had on to so I could take the picture and didn’t tell him to be totally naked. He was shaky and crying when I took the pictures, so I didn’t bring it up at all after I was finished and instead just held him as we watched cartoons. The look on his face when I asked to photograph his contusions made my heart ache.

This conversation is going to scare him. It’s going to make him cry. Hell, it’s probably going to make me cry. Davey and I need to have it, though. After today, I’ll have all the information I need from him and we never have to bring it up again.

I take a deep breath, then I start walking to our room.





Notes

Ooh, and the plot thickens!

What do you guys think? Did Sloane happen to see Mina, or did she follow her all the way from New Mexico?

Also, are you liking the story so far? I'd be much happier if I knew :D

Yours,
~Niki X,,,,,,x

Comments

Awesome update! Don't get discouraged, keep up the super sick work! :D Love it!

SmuttyPariah SmuttyPariah
10/2/17

You butthole! You know I love your stuff! I'm WAY WAY WAY behind on reading anyone else's shit since starting my new job, though. It only gives me time to write 1-2 times a week, if that. I have to give that priority as I've gotten pretty cranky from not being able to write as often as I want to. But I wouldn't take getting no comments personally. Even when I was updating my shit 5 times a week, I'd get maybe 1 comment every 6-8 weeks from someone that wasn't a personal friend I've known for years, across 3 different platforms.

SmuttyPariah SmuttyPariah
7/30/17

omg, stfu grandma! mina can't resist the androo!

he digs what essentially amounts to her baggage, so hit it, mina, hit it! do it for all of us! :OD

anathema anathema
3/7/17

I love it so far!!!

TheSadOutcast TheSadOutcast
3/7/17

'anthem,' eh? anthem for a generation of dying, rotting, nekkid zombies!

my arch-rival is right- i also get almost no comments on anything i write, so don't let it get to you. it's also pretty classic to have so few votes early on, that one a-hole sinks your rating a lot. shit, i have a story that's over 300 pages long, and it still only has, i dunno, less than 40 ratings, i think.

p.s. andy is a dreamy kinda guy! :O)

anathema anathema
2/21/17