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A Demon's Regret


Through the bliss-filled haze, something was still bothering me. Kissing Andy was more than distracting, but eventually, I just couldn’t leave it alone. Reluctantly, I pulled back. “Andy, I’m really glad you told me how you feel, but what does it have to do with Satan visiting?”

Andy immediately looked harried. He checked his pockets and looked around until he found that little sheet of paper he’d had in his hand earlier. He spoke rapidly and gestured to me with it as though it had great significance. “I’ve outlined everything, my resplendent jewel, that I not leave you uninformed! I have been at great pains since my Father’s visit; I have still so much to tell you. But my love for you, that is the keystone, the very reason all of this has occurred.” Andy theatrically dropped to a knee and took my hand in both of his. “I beg you, my fairest nereid, will you hear out the rest of what I have to say?”

Andy waved towards the sofas with his tail, a look of hope in his bright eyes. Nervous, I forced a smile. “Of course, go ahead.” Together we went and had a seat.

Andy took another dainty sip of his soda, nervously fiddling with his sheet. He made as though to set down his drink, but then took a longer, second swallow. Of course, it made him burp, and he looked mortified. “Goodness! My apologies for my impropriety, my manners-“

I chuckled. “-Andy, soda makes everyone burp, it’s ok. I do it too.” To try and make him feel better, I took a swig from my soda and managed a small, staccato belch.

His eyebrows were raised, his expression inquisitive, as he brought the soda to his lips again. He waited a moment after taking a gulp before getting impatient. “I see the effect is not always immedia-“ *burp* He chortled, “Ah, how very earthy and satisfying! What a bizarre beverage! And yet, I mustn’t get distracted…”

He took a moment to review his little outline, and I felt my nerves stringing tight. “Well, to answer your question, I owe my Father for the realization of the nature of my feelings. I thought I was merely becoming ill.” He hesitated. “I even wondered if I was transforming into a human woman.”

What the Hell? I blinked. “But why?”

He blushed, “I have seen, for centuries, the actions of human women in love. I suppose I just thought it was the nature of the human female, to act so sentimental, like a weakling.” I laughed out loud at that!

Andy rushed to apologize, “Never fear, I now know the error of my assumption! You see, my Father has many creations, including the others of my kind. But I am different.” Of course he was, he was so special!

“Lucifer is actually my father, as in, biologically; my mother was a human woman.” My mouth fell open. “I know, it seems implausible that I wouldn’t know such a thing, but my memories of my youth were hidden away, so that I could blend in. My father simply returned them earlier today, and clarified that I was not truly ill, just lovesick.” Returned them? Like a thing? Andy had a human mother? Satan was his dad-dad?

Seeing the look on my face, Andy continued his explanation. “My mother’s name is Amy. She’s lovely, I’m sure you’ll like her, and she, you.” I raised an eyebrow. “Oh, she, eh, she was granted immortality by, eh, my grandfather.”

“As in god?” Andy nodded. That was insane! “Whoa! Have you met?”

Andy shrugged. “Isn’t he supposed to be everywhere? So I suppose, in the metaphysical sense.”

Oh great. God was an asshole that hadn’t even bothered to meet his own grandson! What a douche! That was not promising at all.

Andy went on, “That brings me to the next matter. My father, er, Satan, went to speak to my grandfather on my behalf-“

“-Shit, Andy what the fuck did you do? Is everything ok?” My heart was pounding in my chest; what the hell do you do when you’re in trouble with motherfucking god? And since when did Satan and god get along?

Andy waved his hands and tail animatedly. “No-no, it’s nothing like that!” Once again he reviewed his little sheet. “My father knew I would never leave you, so he was seeking out the Allfather’s help. And he has agreed, er, conditionally.”

Oh fuck. “My queen, the Creator has agreed to break our contract, free me from my bottomless appetite, and grant you immortality, that we can be together.” Andy paused, my heart nearly stopping in my chest. “But, of course, there’s more to it.”

He went on to tell me the craziest shit I’d heard in my life. That I was some kind of test of Andy’s worthiness as the heir to the ‘Dark Throne,’ though the role was largely symbolic. That he had to go and literally ask every still-living woman under a contract with him for forgiveness, that it could take over a year. And scariest of all, that some other demon had to be my roommate the entire time. There had been more, but it all blended together in a metaphysical clusterfuck.

Andy scrunched his nose with distaste. “Ashley is a lascivious creature, and will surely try and bed you. How could he possibly resist? However, you must resist, my innocent flower. I believe that Yahweh intends to test your love for me by giving me a task of atonement that shall keep me from you so long, and by placing you in the care of one of my kind.” In his care? But I did just fine on my own!

Andy sniffed. “Only Ashley is available, I fear.” Andy must have sensed my distress, as he forced a smile. “Don’t fret, my sweet apricot! Ashley, at the least, has an excellent sense of humor.”

Andy sat up very straight, squaring his shoulders. “And so, that is, in truth, why my father came to visit.I t’s my understanding that we can begin, as soon as everyone involved has agreed.”

Andy’s tail twitched, betraying his doubts. “So, ah, how do you feel about the arrangement? Would you accompany me, as my lover, become an immortal?” His voice got quieter. “Will you wait for me?”


Aww, Andy-man is nervous! What do you think she will say?

For any of you that read my works, I would love to be nominated for the fanfiction awards. I know the odds of me winning anything are very small, but I can still hold out hope. All you have to do is go HERE and name the story and author.

To find any of my stories on wattpad (they are all on wattpad): go HERE

I appreciate anyone who supports me. It means a lot, I’ve been having some tough times recently and writing is a great way to be creative and keep my mind off of things. It’s rather difficult to get any sort of positive reinforcement with fanfic writing as a hobby. Nominations end on January 29th, 2017



I try! ;3


Working on it! <3

SmuttyPariah SmuttyPariah

I hope you're feeling better!

Naughty Naughty Naughty! :)

Merelan Merelan

Oh, coolness... can't wait to read that chapter! :)

Merelan Merelan


I know, right? Haha! I think it might be even fluffier than my Santa oneshot. But never fear- I never provide fluff unbalanced by filth. Heh.

SmuttyPariah SmuttyPariah