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A Demon's Regret


I had prepared as much as I could for the arrival of the Dark Father. I had showered, touched up my coiffure, stored away all superfluous energy from (Y/N), bathed, and summoned an appropriately decorous waistcoat, blouse, brogans, and trousers from our realm.

Still, I was overwrought. So much was at stake, which was irksome enough on its own. But the fact remained that I shouldn’t have felt so strongly about trying to convince the Boss Man to help me gain (Y/N) eternal life. It was a sure sign I was affected by something novel and insidious. Though I didn’t find this new disorder too dreadful thus far, it was most definitely changing me. I was fairly certain I’d never wanted anything so much in my life as greatly as I wanted to spend the rest of my days with (Y/N), not even my contract with Lola.

Thinking of Lols again, after so long, brought a sharp pang of guilt. Of all the women I had ever had sign themselves away, none had paid more dearly. And she had been so undeserving of her fate… I found myself, not for the first time, wishing pointlessly that I could do something to make amends, to help her find contentment. Of all the broken hearts I’d left behind me, hers had been the noblest. I hoped she had found happiness somewhere, somehow, in something other than me.

I squawked, startled, when there was a knock at the door. My natural instinct was to hide, but then I realized it was noon already. It might very well be Beelzebub at the entry.

I cleared my throat, straightened my spine, squared my shoulders, and went to the door. “It’s me, Andy,” came filtering through the cracks as I hesitated. Quickly, I unbolted and unlocked the door.

Upon opening it, there he was indeed. Jittery, I bowed my head and stood aside for him to come in, shutting the door behind him. “You don’t need to be so formal, kid. It’s just us.”

My heart was hammering in my chest, so great was my disquiet. “Please, my dark sovereign, be seated and easeful. Would you like any human beverages?” I hesitated, thinking of all the energy I had stored away. I didn’t want to share (Y/N)’s delectable bliss. So, perhaps foolishly, I did not offer any.

The Big Man scoffed and sat down, worrying me. “Like I said, Andy, there’s no need to be so ceremonial, ok? Just have a seat, we have a lot to talk about.”

I sat, rigidly perched on the edge of an armchair. “Of course, my, uh… yes, of course.”

Mephistopheles let out a long, weary sigh. “I guess, I’ll just start by asking if there’s anything you want to talk about first?”

All my carefully organized thoughts fled, and I couldn’t remember all the talking points I had made in advance. Harried, I impulsively said the first thing that came to mind. “I think I’m becoming a human woman, darkest majesty.” Lucifer made a stunned face, as though I’d told him I was growing an angel’s wings and halo. “I believe I have some sort of affliction. I’ve become overemotional. A simpering, dewy-eyed, sentimental-“

At first he was taken aback, but then he burst out laughing! “Ah! Ah, shit! Jesus, Andy!”

Wildly uncomfortable at the mention of the lamb of god, and unclear concerning the significance of his invocation, I grinned nervously. “This was his doing, sire? I know he possesses the power of transformation, but it seems inconsistent with his previous behavior…”

The Dark Lord settled down, shaking his head. “No, no it wasn’t J.” He hesitated. “Andy, I know what’s happening, the sort of feelings you’re having. And I know why it’s happening, as well.”

He looked at a loss for words, and gestured with his hands as though they just wouldn’t come. I waited; dread forming a steely ball in my gut. “Andy, I just want to say, I’m about to tell you a lot of stuff. It will change a lot of things, and it will probably be scary, but I’m sure you’ll be glad, once we’re done.”

I was also most definitely sure I’d be glad when this conversation was finished! “Please, continue, my-hmm…”

Lucifer nodded solemnly. “Andy, nothing is wrong with you. You’re in love.”


Any feedback is appreciated right now as I've had a rough time, writing-wise, lately.

On a serious note:

In Nazi Germany, there were many people who did nothing to support Hitler and the Nazis, but who did nothing to stop them, either. Inaction at a time of crisis is unacceptable. Learn from history and stand up for what is right every moment of every day. The time is NOW.

The FBI determined some months ago that hacking, originating from Russia, was having an influence on our electoral process. These hackers interfered with our presidential election through attempted and successful penetration of email and voter registration databases, among other systems. This created fear, uncertainty, and doubt about the safety of our electoral processes.

Computers tabulated the vast majority of the 129 million votes cast in the presidential election, and polls were wildly off. Did hackers manipulate the results by compromising voting equipment? Did other problems, glitches, or errors affect the outcome?

There's a simple, relatively inexpensive way to find out: audit the electronic results against the paper ballots used by about 75% of U.S. voters.

American democracy depends on public trust of our electoral process, and public trust requires a trustworthy process.

Please sign to demand that election officials double-check the electronic results by conducting a "risk-limiting" audit of the presidential election in every state that uses paper ballots.

Demand An Audit Of The 2016 Presidential Election

Along similar lines:

As my arch-nemesis has also mentioned in her notes recently, there is a petition online to ask the electoral college to change their votes to reflect the will of the majority/popular vote. They certainly are allowed to do this, and even in states where they are not supposed to, they only need pay a fine. Additionally, in several key states ('won' by trump, including Pennsylvania), the validity of the electronic voting has recently been called into question.

Thus, it is the only just course of action to sign the following petition. It already has the support of well over 1% of the USA's population, which is record-breaking:

Electoral College: Make Hillary Clinton President on December 19, 2016



I try! ;3


Working on it! <3

SmuttyPariah SmuttyPariah

I hope you're feeling better!

Naughty Naughty Naughty! :)

Merelan Merelan

Oh, coolness... can't wait to read that chapter! :)

Merelan Merelan


I know, right? Haha! I think it might be even fluffier than my Santa oneshot. But never fear- I never provide fluff unbalanced by filth. Heh.

SmuttyPariah SmuttyPariah