A Demon's Regret

The longer I sat with (Y/N) in my arms, the more self-restraint and patience grew near impossible. While it delighted me that (Y/N) had bought me everything material that I had desired, I had yet to receive the one thing from her I wanted most, the only thing that really mattered. I had taken every measure I could to address all of her doubts, reassure her, and make her feel comfortable. I couldn’t stop my mind from running in circles, spurred on by (Y/N)’s incredible aroma!

Never in my life had I asked my Father to speak to a human on my behalf, but (Y/N) was worth it! I would do it again. One would have thought that the word of the Dark Lord would not have been convincing to a lot of humankind, but that just proved what a modern, sophisticated gem (Y/N) was!

Though I wondered what the big man had been on about, implying that we would be talking again, as in a chat? That I could just call the Ruler of the Underworld, like a father-Father, if I felt the need to let it all out?

And was I immune to all disease? Was I some sort of super-demon? Perhaps that was why I had always been treated with such favor… I was a secret weapon! Goodness, he could have mentioned that! Should I casually bring it up or pretend I had noticed nothing? Either way, it hardly mattered. I was a slave and (Y/N) was my mistress now.

I no longer cared how foolish I looked in other demons’ eyes, if I was a laughing stock for the rest of my existence or not. Well, maybe I cared a little, but (Y/N) was still a far greater priority.

I only wanted to do whatever I could, anything, so that (Y/N) would believe me when I told her I wasn’t trying to infect her with the Antichrist, or anything else nefarious along those lines. I wanted to remove all the barriers in my way, everything that was stopping me from being with her as her lover.

I had deduced that it was so much more than a matter of my pride and of convenience, but I wasn’t sure why. I figured that (Y/N)’s powerful emotions were warping me and making me sick, but I knew better than to fight the powerful urges they gave me, I was far too weak in comparison. And, if I was being truthful, a part of me enjoyed this subjugation, when it was going well… Her kisses and her touch, the way she had looked with her lips wrapped around me, I’d never felt anything-

“Would you like to see my fountain pens, Andy?” (Y/N) looked shy, and I could tell how pleased she was that I had liked the pen she had given me, that she was enjoying 'snuggling.' Her pleasure at my happiness filled me, a bizarre flavor, but a scrumptious one. Most of my prey paid only lip service to how I felt; in reality caring very little. It made a nice compliment with the naughty secret she thought she kept hidden between her legs, the womanhood that wept so freely for me.

Her physical desire for me continued to amplify and was getting so distracting, so fragrant, it was almost useless to try and carry on coherent conversation. This 'cuddling' would most definitely have to stop. I needed to adjust myself, I couldn’t stop my damned loins from responding to her body’s natural perfume and I was getting acutely uncomfortable.

Every time our eyes would meet her heart rate would increase, and her brain would release a bouquet of chemicals so divine I’d feel myself stiffen even further. When our skin glided together, her respiratory rate was almost twice as fast. When she said my name to ask about her fountain pens, her fluids were starting to soak completely through her panties. I was losing my mind just holding her, inhaling her delicious pheromones, the smell of her hair, her breath. Her body’s sweet siren song would destroy me if I didn’t answer its call soon.

I licked my lips. “My divine Tsarevna-” when (Y/N) made a perplexed face I realized I had dated myself and cleared my throat. “Ah, beg pardon. I can be contemporary too!”

I struggled for a moment. “My sexy bitch-“

(Y/N) burst out laughing, and I decided that perhaps just being myself was the better of the two options as I felt my face heat up. I urged her up, then stood and took her hand, getting her to follow me to her guest bedroom. She moved towards the fountain pens, but I stopped her. “No! They can wait, (Y/N). The only thing I want is your consent. Let me touch you? Please? I want to.”

I felt fear, self-hatred, and self-doubt radiating from (Y/N) to the point of almost terror. She didn’t want to meet my gaze, and I found that hurt me somehow. I found myself having to say things I’d never had to say before. I still spoke the truth, but it was so different. I felt so defenseless. It hurt in my chest, like a physical pain. “Please, look at me.” She did, but only briefly, with her wide, (Y/E/C) eyes, uncertain. I felt her on the threshold of rejecting me again.

No! If (Y/N) rejected me again, living held no appeal any longer, it wouldn’t be the same anymore! I didn’t want to go back to my old life! Nothing was as good as (Y/N)!

“Please, trust me.” I didn’t know it, but, like an ass, I had started to tear up a bit, like some idiot, effeminate, wretch. “I want you…”

Still, (Y/N) said nothing! She moved her eyes from me to the ground! I felt my first solid, undeniable rejection, unexpected and horrifying, destroy everything I wanted, everything I needed! I wanted to scream, to kill (Y/N), to kill every man that had hurt her to make her so, but I couldn’t move, couldn’t speak. This wasn’t supposed to happen.

I didn’t have any words as I felt despair take hold of every part of me. The thought that I would never have (Y/N)’s blessing, not even to touch her, much less lay with her as a man began to eat my body alive. I just gave up and let the hopelessness of a forever-unfulfilled dream consume me where I stood.

It was the lowest moment I had ever had, and I wished for the end to come quickly. I felt the weight melting off my frame rapidly as all the strength left my body. I did not ask for Father to help me, because I did not want him to. Not even the boss man could make someone return affections that apparently were not there, after all. I did not know if even my Grandfather had that power. I began to stumble as I grew weaker.

Notes

Dedicated to Ana Grace-

My dear I believe you've mentioned you also have been a follower on tumblr. Do you want to give credit to team tumblr army as well? (So far they have had zero updates). In the future, which side do you choose? (You can go both ways too, I do it all the time! hahahaha!)