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A Demon's Regret


I just stared at Andy for a moment. I had no idea what to say! My deep-rooted insecurities were completely incompatible with what Andy, the incredibly slick, attractive, charismatic, altogether sexy demon, was saying.

It seemed impossible that he could want me at all, but so much that it hurt him? Why didn't he just leave if he was hungry? My inner self-doubt was, of course, trying to revolt at the thought that Andy might actually find me special or different in any way, even above-average. And yet, there he was, looking totally, abjectly miserable.

If I was being honest with myself, he looked more than just unhappy. He looked… ill. Thin and really pale. For a moment there I had even…

"Andy..." I didn't know what I thought yet-

Andy looked up at me, and startled me by reaching out quickly for one of my hands. His expression cycled rapidly from disappointment to irritation as he stood up, a little wobbly on his feet, still holding my hand.

"Curses, (Y/N)! I have never, not ever, rolled over and revealed my fleshy, pink, underbelly to a human!" What? Andy's tummy was pretty damned slim and pale, and I was sure lots of women-

He rolled his eyes and snorted, minuscule curls of smoke coming out of each nostril. "Meaning, (Y/N), that I am frustrated that I have shared with you, truthfully, my debilitated state, and yet you do not believe me. You have destroyed my natural working order, the balance of my life, and now I am literally dying to have you!"

Andy caressed my cheek with his other hand. "Something is terribly wrong with me, (Y/N). It is not just pride that keeps me from leaving, I think you've made me unwell. That must be. Normally, women are eager for me, but you barely tolerate me."

Andy sighed, and I couldn't help but notice that his fingers really were incredibly, unnaturally slender. With a terrible sense of alarm, I realized Andy had noticeably lost weight just since entering the bathroom! His hips protruded above his pants like they never had before, it was a good things he was wearing a belt!

Andy smiled sadly, still holding my hand. "I never believed in destiny, but maybe I was wrong. Perhaps my time is up. If that is the case, I am so glad the Fates sent me to you, as the way to end me, my sweet nectarine."

Shit! Andy's eyes were sunken in! I had to do something! He just looked at our hands sadly and interlaced our fingers. Softly, he tugged my hand to his lips to kiss it, and I saw his lips had visibly thinned! He seemed to be so weak, he had given up!

"No! Andy!" He smiled dimly at me, tottering on his feet, and I watched, horrified, as some of his hair floated to the floor.

I pulled my hand roughly out of his and pushed him against the door. Andy barely reacted, just closing his eyes and nodding, now feeling a bit cold in my hands. I tried not to go into a panic attack when I noticed how prominent his ribs had suddenly become; if I didn't enjoy this, Andy would die!

Grabbing his head, I kissed him, hoping he'd get the hint. For a moment, he seemed too weak and dazed, and responded only sluggishly as he grew colder.

Desperate, I grabbed his hand and put it on my boob, over my shirt, then forced my tongue in his mouth. I felt him squeeze my breast softly and lightly touch my butt with his other hand. Yes! I felt such joy at the small touches, hope like I never had for anything, ever before!

Exponentially, the movement of Andy's lips and tongue gained life, skill, and then went from clever to breathtaking. I moaned as he kissed down my neck and managed to burrow under my shirt and bra with both, warm, hands to knead both of my breasts possessively.

Andy scratched me lightly with his claws as his lips found mine again. “Ah, temptress!” He murmured, purring, between kisses; he was smiling! He wrapped his tail around my waist and pulled me closer. I could feel the firm lump in his pants as it grew, God! He was the best kisser I'd ever known, ever imagined! His touch was Paradise!

Andy pulled away, and I was overjoyed to see he looked better! He shocked me by kneeling in front of me and taking both of my hands in his and kissing them. "Please, please (Y/N)! You are my goddess; I beg you, let me spend myself inside of you! I want to mark you there, in your most sacred place. Let me fill your womb with my tribute, that the world knows you are mine, as you have subjugated me completely and made me yours."

I frowned down at Andy. "Are you kidding me?"

Andy looked devastated. "No?" He looked confused for a moment, but I wasn't fast enough to elaborate before he stood and pushed me away, a bit roughly.

"Argh!" He snarled, tail lashing furiously, cracking across the wall and scoring it. "Father, why!?! What have I done? This is torture!"

Andy turned to me, angry now. "You must hate me! Somehow, you have masked your true feelings. Are you even human? You cannot be, to have emotions of such strength, to taste so divine! I should have known; I was such a fool! You are a trap to destroy me! Who sent you, woman? What are you?"

Andy leaned towards me and sniffed loudly. I was confused and embarrassed. Andy shook his head, seemingly stumped, and still fuming. "Dammit, it doesn't even matter! Just let me die, you jezebel! Whoever sent you, let them know they have succeeded! They have undone me with a woman!"

Andy threw his hands up, clucking in disgust, and sat on the edge of the bathtub, his head in his hands.

I reached for Andy’s shoulder. “Andy-“

Andy peered at me and snarled, his tail smacking the side of the tub. “-Leave me be! Just let me die, damn it to the pits! I’ll never be content without your affections, and I shall clearly never have them as you’re some sort of agent-“

"Andy, I was just pissed that you thought I'd let you bone me without a condom. I mean, you've been with-".

Andy looked up, startled, his slit-pupiled eyes comically large. "-Oh." He fussed with his hair for a moment, clearly embarrassed. "I, uh, am sterile, and I am not human. I cannot harbor your human species’ sexually transmitted infections-"

I opened my mouth to tear him a new asshole, but he raised both hands in a desperate-looking placating gesture. "-There's more! Of course, I, um, carry none of the demonic variety.” Andy laughed weakly. “But, I will gladly wear a condom for you, (Y/N), of course! I will wear ten!” Ten? “However, since their invention, all different types have yielded the same result: they break."

I raised an eyebrow ready to call some serious bullshit. Andy pursed his lips. "I saw you have pictures of cats. What do you know about the tom cat's reproductive ensemble?"

I grinned. 'Reproductive ensemble?' That was new! "They get in fights all the time and pee on everything, they're incorrigible!"

Andy laughed. "True! But also, they have spines on their, well, penis. And, frankly, so do I. They tear condoms."

My mouth dropped open. How the fuck had I not noticed? "But... I didn't, uh, see, I didn’t feel..."

Andy stood and came closer to me, smirking a bit more like his usual self. "I know they're visible. Would you like to check again?"


What do you think? Is demon-Andy telling the truth?



I try! ;3


Working on it! <3

SmuttyPariah SmuttyPariah

I hope you're feeling better!

Naughty Naughty Naughty! :)

Merelan Merelan

Oh, coolness... can't wait to read that chapter! :)

Merelan Merelan


I know, right? Haha! I think it might be even fluffier than my Santa oneshot. But never fear- I never provide fluff unbalanced by filth. Heh.

SmuttyPariah SmuttyPariah