Night Watch I: Eliza, Ward of Andrew

*Andrew’s POV*

“Eliza, do you have a moment?” She raised an eyebrow, smiling.

“No, Andrew, I cannot possibly speak and fold clothes at the same time.” We laughed, though I’m sure I sounded jarring from taut nerves. “Of course. Actually, I wanted to ask you something too.” Oh?

“Please, you go first.” A weapons question? My past? That would really be the worst possible time to want to talk about Juliet… Hopefully something about the tribe or the Watch…

“If I can be totally frank, Andrew, I need company. Do you have any suggestions?” Company? Eliza didn’t strike me as very strongly extroverted. She seemed to thrive with one on one interactions. I had really been looking forward to spending time with her alone…

“Well, um, of course, I will make an effort to attend social events in the future with you, so that you can make friends. I can clean the place up a bit and we can have company over. Did you like Christian or Ginger? Or Nikki, or Big Pete? I assume Jinxx would make you ill right now, and unless you insist, I already see enough of Blasko.

“Uhhh…” I wracked my brain, trying to remember who Eliza had met, guiltily leaving out David and John on purpose. “How about Sandra or Steven? Any of the Healers? I don’t know them very well, except Dani, but I didn’t see him today… What sort of get-togethers do you like? We could go get drinks, or go out on a music night…“ Eliza was grinning and shaking her head, clearly I was on the wrong track. I trailed off, confused.

Eliza winked at me playfully. “I’m sorry if you find me raunchy, esteemed Second Officer Andrew of the Night Watch, but that’s not what I meant. What I’m saying is that I haven’t gotten laid in years, and I’m frustrated. I need a good fuck, preferably more than once. Do you know anyone of decent character that would accept a hybrid as a lover? I imagine every Wild One will know in the next day or so I’m not a full-blooded Fae, based on how things went last night.”

What?! I felt like I had been punched in the gut. I was going to lose my mind! Was I invisible? Gods, am I so hideous? I thought it was readily apparent I was smitten by Eliza, that’s what Blasko had said, what everyone said; why in the deepest pits of all the hells would she ask me such a question?

“Andrew, are you ok?” I realized I had been standing there, with my mouth partway open, and my eyes bulging, for some time. Fuck it. This had to be done, and I was going all-in.

I took the piece of clothing she had in her hands and tossed it on the floor, then took her rough hand in both of mine and knelt at her feet. “I would, I fucking would!” Eliza’s jaw dropped open and her eyebrows shot clear through the roof of the shelter.

“Just hear me out, please! I care for you, Eliza, I want to be there for you and help you make a fresh start here. You have been through the unspeakable, I want to help you heal from that and I want to protect you from anything like that ever happening again. You are strange and beautiful and have an inspiringly vulgar tongue.” I shook my head, the words weren’t enough, they sounded inane and trite, shit! I tried again.

“I am not a perfect man, I’ve done lots of stupid things. And I know that I am covered with many unsightly scars, that I’m not the most attractive partner you could find. But I don’t trust that anyone else will treat you as well as you deserve. You are a treasure. You’re intelligent, funny, and cranky, and dammit, you’re so fucking hot!” Eliza still looked stunned. Shitshitshit! I tried again, I couldn’t give up!

“Look, I’m sorry, I know it’s very soon for me to have developed, I mean, for me to… What I mean is that it sounds like you are looking for physical gratification only. Fine, if that’s all you want, I can do that too, if only so that I know there’s no chance that anyone else is taking advantage of you, or hurting you. I’ve been told in the past I was, uh, an acceptable sexual partner. Um, I’m sorry if I’ve complicated things, shit.” Eliza still looked shocked, and thus, my little wisp of hope went out. I released Eliza’s hand and rose from the floor. I felt my entire being deflate, almost to nothingness.

“I, uh, nevermind, it wasn’t my intention to make you so uncomfortable. I thought it was perhaps a good time to let you know, I, I didn’t realize it would upset you so greatly, I... I’m so very, very sorry.” I was so ashamed, I felt my face flush. I looked at the ground.

“I, um, I forgot to add, that, of course, I will be here for you, to encourage you and advocate for you, to be the best warden I can be, regardless of who you take as a lover. He or she is, of course, welcome here as well. I can sleep with a pillow over my head. I’m sure the Council wouldn’t mind if I left the shelter briefly, either.” Fuck, I needed a drink. I needed an entire tavern.

“Andrew…” Eliza spoke softly. “You’re not gay?”

Notes

:D

been waiting for that for a while!

i wonder what Andrew will have to say about that?