I love you as long as the bridge hugs gently the river

This was it, I couldn't take it anymore, it was so unfair. My life was unfair, first my parents then that. I just couldn't take it anymore. I had so much pain in my soul that it was physically killing me. I was running towards my room when I bumped into someone, I didn't care , so I just continued my way to my room:
-Helena what the hell?? What happened? STOP!!- I heard Sara shouting to me, but I didn't care.
When I entered my room, I jumped into my bed and hid my face into the pillow, so the crying and screaming wasn't that loud. A few seconds later I heard the door open and someone sat down on my bed:
-Come on Helena talk to me!- I heard Sara's pleading voice, but I just started to cry even harder. She laid on me and hugged me very very strongly. We stood like that, it seemed like hours, but in reality it was only a few minutes. I slowly sat up and looked at my best friend's face. My vision wasn't so clear because of the crying and my voice sounded like i was about to loose it, so I cleared my throat and began:
-Uhmmm Andy.....-I didn't know how to say it to her, it was so hard.
-Yes, what happened??!! What did he do to you ??-Sara asked.
-Well he said that he loved me...
-Then what's the problem, I don't get it!
-First of all let me finish my sentence- I said to her a bit angrily- but he said that he loves Veronica too, and he is staying with her, because she needs him, cause her parents were taken and blah blah blah, that's what he said to me, oh and that he's sorry- I've waited for Sara's reaction.
-OMG, he is such an asshole!!!!!!!!- she screamed out- now I'm going to beat the shit out of him-she said and she stood up but I grabbed her hand.
-No!! You are not going to do anything.
-So you are going to beat the shit out of him??- she asked me in an excited voice.
-No, we are going to do nothing!! This is his choice, not ours, so I'll respect him, I love him but he will never love me true, like I love him, so this is it, I need to find the one who is really meant to me, because Andrew is definitely not for me.
-Helena...-that was all that passed her lips.
-Just please, can we just drop the subject, please.
-Yes, yes sure, what do you want to talk about?
-Well what's going on between you and Jake?
-Oh God, Helena, he is the sweetest person that I've ever met! He is doing so much for me!! He helps me all the time, even when I don't ask him to, and he hugs me and kisses my cheeks when I need it the most, and every time I'm around him, I just can't stop smiling like an idiot, Helena, I think I'm falling for him!- I listened as Sara gushed about Jake, every second I was about to cry, but I held it inside as long as I could, but when she mentioned that she was falling for him, I let one single tear fall from my left eye, Sara didn't see it and I'm glad for it, I don't want her to worry about me, it's enough for me to feels this pain.
-So Helena, what do you suggest? What should I do with Jake? Tell him that I'm in love with him or wait 'till he does something or says something?
-I think that you should wait until he says something about his feelings!- I said to her trying to act calm, but deep inside I was crying and screaming.
-That's a great idea!
-Anyway, where is Julie?
-Oh don't tell me, she is all day long with Ash. They seem so in love. I think that Ashley has already asked her to be his girlfriend. I mean yesterday when we left the medical room, I saw them kissing.
-No way!!- I said with a huge smile on my face- Ash is Julie's first love. I just hope that Ash won't break Julie's heart.
-I don't think so, I mean Jake told me that Ash used to fool around with girls every day, but since Julie arrived, she is all he can talk about, and Julie is the first girl who made Ash wait with sex. Jake told me that it's a huge thing.
-Ohh...this is something big then for real. I think that they are feeling love for the first time. This is so romantic.-I said with happiness and a little sadness in my voice.
-Yep it is!-Sara said while she was standing up from my bed- Now I'm sorry, but Jake told me to meet him and I don't want to be late, I'm sorry for leaving you right now.
-Oh no problem, just go and have fun, I'll be fine!
-Are you sure? You look a little bit pale.
-Yeah, yeah, just go already!! I'm sure if you don't hurry all you'll get is a pissed off Jake, and you don't want that, don't you?- I said with a smirk on my face.
-Well yes, you won, but please take care of yourself. I don't know what I would do without you.
-Same here. Take care, and watch out with having too much fun, I don't want to be an auntie yet.- I said letting out a little giggle.
-OK, OK!!-with that she left the room laughing.
Alone again. What should I do?? Maybe I should go to the lake tomorrow, and now I'll rest a bit.


So let's go to the lake. I know that there I won't be interrupted by anyone, especially not by Andy, since the thing happened with Vanessa people don,t want to go there up, they are all afraid. But I'm not, not in this moment, I don't care if they kill me, everyone around me found their true love, their true happiness, they don't need me anymore, no one needs me anymore, I miss my parents. As I was thinking like this, I was going to the door that keeps us inside, as I opened it I was met with a bright light. I didn't stop, I was walking as fast as I could. I only stopped when I was close enough to the water but still I could sit down without getting wet. I sat down and looked deep into the beautiful water. I remembered when I was in that lake, but now the blood is long gone and so Vanessa's body. There was no one around, so I thought I should sing something:
All my friends tell me I should move one
I'm lying in the ocean singing you're song
Ahhhh, that's how you sang it
Loving you forever, can't be wrong
Even though you're not here, won't move on
Ahhhh, that's how we played it.....-I softly sang an old song from Lana Del Rey 'Dark Paradise' which I think describes my life now perfectly. After an hour or two I decided that I should go in, before the night comes. I slowly walked back, I closed the door behind me and I returned.
And maybe now I should go to the kitchen and make some yummiii food to myself. As I was approaching the kitchen I heard screams. Oh no, what's going on??!! I quickly ran there, but when I arrived there I saw Veronica on the kitchen table and between her legs was Andy kissing her neck, that's why Veronica was screaming so loud, Oh God that day was getting better and better, I love you life so much!!!
-Oh hey, it's just you. I thought that someone is in danger.
-Yeah, I'm in danger, Andy is trying to eat me-Veronica said with an evil giggle in her voice.
Yeah, well I don't think that Andy loves me that much, anyway I came here for food, so i'm gonna make some food for me, even if these two are going to fuck on the kitchen table.
-Well, whatever, I'm just trying to make some food, so please if you would do this somewhere else that would be amazing.
-As you wish-Veronica said-Babe are you coming?
-Yeah, just wait a minute, I'm bringing some food, but you can go and wait for me in my room-Andy said.
-Yeah, OK, but don't make me wait to much.-Veronica said and then walked away.
'What should I eat?' I said to myself as I was looking in the fridge. But suddenly a pair of strong hands grabbed my waist and pulled me to the wall.
-What the..-this is all I could say before I was cut off with the lips of an angel, it was Andy's lips. I instantly pushed him away and looked at him with anger and sadness.
-You have no idea, how much I wanted to do this...-He couldn't finish what he was saying, because I slapped him-What was that for??
-Don't play with my emotions Andrew, do you know how it feels seeing you with her, do you know how broken I am, and this is all because of you, you killed me Andy, this is not a joke, or what do you think, that I'm just a toy, well you're wrong, and leave me alone, don't hurt me anymore, please-I said while I was crying, his face I don't know, I really don't care right now, I just don't want to be hurt anymore, so I started to ran as fast as I could, but then i remembered something, and ran back- I need my food!- I said and I took 3 bar of chocolate, and ran away in my room with those. I locked my room, so no one could come in, and i screamed as loud as I could, and cried, and I ate the chocolates, all of it, and after it I fell into a sleep full of nightmares.

Notes

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