I Was So Bitter, Till You Came Along

The day before the guys left for their six month tour, they all wanted to hang out with Casey, so Andy and her were hosting a little get together at their house.

An hour and half after they all arrived, Casey's phone started ringing, and she excused herself to go answer it in the kitchen, making sure the door was closed behind her.

"Hey, Kelly. It's been a while," she said, a happy smile on her face.

"It really has, sweetie. How have you been?" Kelly asked.

"I've been good. There's actually something I need to tell you," she said quietly.

"What's that? Sweetheart, is something wrong?" Kelly asked, worry laced in her tone. Casey laughed quietly and shook her head, not hearing the door open.

"No, nothing's wrong. But, I'm pregnant," she told her. She gasped.

"Casey Marie!!" She exclaimed.

"What!?" Casey heard from behind her, and she turned around, losing her grip on her phone. There was CC, wide eyed, his jaw slack.

"No!" she exclaimed, stopping him from turning around to leave. He faced her.

"I thought-"

"I know what you thought. I thought it too! You have to promise me you won't tell anyone. Especially Ashley!" She said, panicking only slightly. Andy entered the kitchen, his brows raised.

"What's going on? Everything all right, Casey?" Andy asked. Casey nodded as she picked up her phone off the floor.

"Kelly, can I call you back to discuss this later?" Casey asked. She agreed, and Casey hung up.

"Close the door," she told Andy, and he did.

"What's wrong?" Andy asked.

"He knows," Casey said, gesturing to CC. Andy's face was now etched with worry.

"CC, you really can't say anything to the guys. I have to have your word that you won't!" Casey begged of him. He still hadn't said anything. He looked between Andy and her, and he sighed.

"Why not?" He asked, "What will happen if I do?"

"You just can't. Not yet. Ashley will flip. Please, Christian. Do I have your word?" Casey asked.

"Yeah. You've got my word. Congratulations," he said, and she pulled him in for a hug.

"Thank you," she said. He nodded, and he left the kitchen. Andy and Casey both laughed nervously, as they both had been afraid that their little secret would get out.

"C'mon, let's get back to the guys," Andy said, taking Casey's hand. She nodded, following him back out to the living room. Ashley eyeballed them suspiciously, but he said nothing as they both sat down on the couch.

"Is everything okay?" Ash asked moments later, making Casey's stomach churn.

"Yup. Everything is a-okay," she said, taking a sip of her water. Ashley nodded, though she knew he didn't believe her.

"Want a beer? I'll get you one," he offered.

"No thanks. I'm okay," she said.

"What, are you pregnant or something?" Jake joked as he walked by to the kitchen, more than likely grabbing himself a drink. Her blood ran cold, and Andy tensed beside her. She averted her gaze to her lap, taking another sip of water to avoid talking and further discussing anything along the topic. Ashley was still hard staring her. When she saw he had turned around through her peripherals, she looked up as Jake returned. He sat back down next to her on her left, and Casey scooted closer to Andy. Ashley was texting on his phone, and next thing she knew, he'd sent her a text telling her he wanted to talk to her. Casey looked up, meeting his gaze, and he stood up. She followed him outside into the cool September air, and she waited while he closed the door. Her phone rang again, and she pulled it out of her pocket, seeing John's name on the screen.

"Hey, stranger. It's been awhile," Casey said. Ashley waited patiently.

"Yeah, it really has. You doin' anything?" He asked. She smiled.

"Currently, yes. Later, no," Casey told him.

"Could I company you with my presence some time this next week? I'm headed to LA for a tour, and I've got a free day on Wednesday," John told her. She smiled.

"Sure. C'mon over whenever. The guys are leaving for a tour tomorrow, so I'll be all alone," she said.

"Awesome. I'll see you soon, darlin'," he said.

"And John," she said before he could hang up.

"Yeah?" He asked.

"There's something really important I need to tell you when you get here," she said, surely making Ashley wonder.

"Okay. I hope it's nothin' bad," he said. She smiled again.

"Nope. I have to go. Bye," she said softly. He reciprocated her goodbye, and Casey shoved her phone into her back pocket. She looked up at Ashley to see his eyebrows raised.

"What the fuck was that?" He asked, his arms crossed.

"A phone call. What the fuck is shoved up your ass?" Casey asked. He groaned in irritation.

"Cut the shit, Casey. Tell me what the fuck's going on. Surely there's something," he said. She shook her head.

"Then why are you telling John there's something important you need to tell him? Why am I in the dark, Casey? I'm your fucking brother," he said. Casey glared at him.

"Because you'd flip your shit. You already are and I haven't even said anything," she said.

"So there is something going on?" He asked.

"Whatever, Ashley. Just leave it alone and go watch your football game," she said. He shook his head.

"This is something more than a fever. You wouldn't ditch a tour because of a fever," Ashley said.

"Then spare me, Ashley," Casey said with a sigh.

"This is more than just feeling under the weather. Casey, you're not pregnant, are you?" He asked. She averted her gaze to ground as her eyes watered. Of course. He found out anyway. He let out a loud groan.

"Casey!" He yelled. Casey looked up at him.

"Don't! Don't start, Ashley!" She yelled back, not knowing what to say.

"Why shouldn't I? You're eighteen and you're pregnant! I'm so furious at you, Casey!" Ashley yelled. Casey opened the front door angrily, tears clouding her vision.

"Woah. Guys, what the hell is going on?" Andy asked, stepping in front of Casey as Ashley followed. Surely they'd heard them yelling.

"She's fucking pregnant!?" Ashley seethed. Andy sighed and pulled Casey into his arms for a gentle hug as to calm her down.

"You're overreacting, Ash," Andy said calmly.

"No I'm not! I can't believe this! My best friend got my sister pregnant! What the fuck is wrong with you!?" Ashley growled.

"Ashley-" Jake tried as he approached, but he got shut down.

"No, Jake. Don't say it. I'm fucking out of here," he snarled. He collected his jacket and left with a slam of the front door. Casey just buried her face in Andy's shirt and cried as he tried to calm her down. Ashley just had to make everything worse, didn't he?

"I think it would be better if you guys left. We need some privacy," Andy told the remaining three guys. They all mumbled something, and then Casey was released from Andy's arms just to be pulled into Jake's. She hugged the guitarist tightly. She got hugs from CC and Jinxx as well before they left. Andy led her over to the couch, and they sat down.

"John's coming over on Wednesday," Casey said quietly. Andy nodded, pressing a soft kiss on her temple.

"That's cool. Are you telling him?" He asked. Casey nodded. Might as well tell him, now that everyone else knew.

"Yeah.... Andy?" She asked.

"Hmm?"

"Do you think.... do you think that maybe Ashley will come to terms with this and accept it?" She asked. Andy could only shrug as he pulled her onto his lap.

"I'm not sure, babe.. I wish I could tell you otherwise," he said with a soft sigh. She nodded, and she curled up against him.

"This is going to be the hardest thing I've ever done," Casey muttered. Andy just squeezed her and kissed her head.

"We'll make it work. Promise," he said.

~~

Saying goodbye to Andy the next morning was harder than Casey thought it would be. She was trying really hard not to cry, because she didn't want him to leave. But he had to. He kissed her goodbye, and got in Jake's car, and she watched as they sped away. Casey slumped her shoulders and headed inside, hugging herself. Now what? He was going to be gone for six months.

Casey made herself comfortable on the couch with a tub of Chocolate ice cream, and she turned Netflix on, deciding to watch some Criminal Minds to distract herself.

For the next few hours, she found herself engrossed in the show with a missed call from Andy. When she noticed it, she listened to the message he left about how he had boarded the plane, and that he'd call her when he landed. Casey smiled to herself after hearing the message, butterflies swarming around in her belly. Thinking of phone calls, she froze as she remembered she had to call Kelly back. No doubt she was confused and possibly upset with her. So, Casey dialled her number and waited.

"Casey! Oh my gosh I seriously thought you weren't going to call me back!" She splurged, talking too fast for her own good.

"All right, calm down. What do you want to know?" Casey asked. She sighed.

"Why are you pregnant? I thought you wanted to go to college! Casey, you never got involved with boys ever. Why the sudden change?" She asked. She was right. Casey had only been here for three months, and she was pregnant and in a relationship. What made her change?

"When... when you uh... put it that way... I guess these past three months changed me? I don't know. Hanging out with these guys is so surreal. I feel like I belong, and I actually am dating someone as of currently. I never pictured this, I swear, I didn't know it was ever going to happen," she said. Kelly sighed.

"I remember you telling me when you were ten that you found kids revolting and never wanted to have any. Now, here you are, eight years later..." she trailed off. Casey sighed.

"Don't do that to me, Kelly. I already got it from Ashley yesterday. And that's true. The part about them being revolting isn't necessarily true, but the part about me not wanting kids is spot on. I don't know what I want to do with the baby. I don't want to terminate it, and half of me wants to put it up for adoption while the other half doesn't. Kelly, I don't know what to do," Casey said softly to her. She was honestly torn in half.

"Casey.. there's something I have to tell you," Kelly said. Casey bit her lip.

"What's that?" She asked her. She was silent for a while before answering, having Casey on the edge of her seat as she anticipated what she had to say.

"I know who your mother is."

~~

John had just arrived in Los Angeles with the band. He was excited to see Casey again after so long of having not talked to her. She sounded fine on the phone, so he was just wondering if what she had to tell him wasn't anything bad, although she'd already told him it wasn't.

That didn't stop his excitement when he knocked on her door, though. She pulled it open, a small smile on her face, and she let him in. John pulled her in for a friendly hug, noticing how tiny she really was compared to him.

"Alright, JohnO. Take a seat," Casey said. John smiled nervously, taking a seat on the couch.

"What is it that you needed to tell me?" He asked. She fiddled with her fingers for a few seconds before opening her mouth.

"This might come as a shock to you... but I found out that I'm pregnant," she told him. His hazel eyes found hers within a second of the news, and he gaped at her.

"You're... you're pregnant?" John asked incredulously. Casey nodded.

"But I thought-" she saved him the trouble.

"That I can't have kids? I know. I did too. But, apparently I am. Four and a half weeks," she said. She pulled out her ultrasound picture and handed it to John. He took it, not seeing anything.

"Where is it?" He deadpanned. She laughed softly, and pointed to a small dot. John smiled, not believing that that small dot was a baby.

"Congratulations, Casey. I'm so happy for you. So you and Biersack decide on if you're going to keep it yet?" John asked. Casey shook her head.

"No, because I still don't know if I want it yet," she said. John nodded, not pressing the subject. If she wanted to keep talking, she would.

"Umm, also," she cleared her throat, "I found out who my mom is."

~~

Ashley kept giving Andy the extreme silent treatment the whole plane ride. Andy sighed when the plane landed, because now he could actually talk to someone... that someone being his beautiful girlfriend. He hit her contact on his phone once off the plane, and waited as it rang. She picked up, not saying anything at first.

"Hey, sweetheart. I just landed," he said.

"Andy."

"Yeah?" He asked, worried now. All he could think about was the worst that could have happened.

"Kelly.... she... she told me who my mother is," Casey said, no emotion in her voice whatsoever.

"Wow! Baby, that's big news!" He exclaimed as Jake walked up next to him to wait for his luggage.

"Yeah... but uh... I'm not sure I wanted to know," she said.

"Yeah? And why's that?" He asked as he spotted his luggage coming toward him.

"Because she lives in LA," she replied.

"Woah. You're serious? Casey, that's amazing. Do you want to meet her?" Andy asked.

"That's the thing. I'm not sure. Kelly gave me all of her details, so all I have to do is call, but... I'm scared. I'm scared that she won't remember me... or worse; that she'll even care," Casey replied. Andy hummed as he grabbed his luggage with his free hand at the same time Jake did. They both walked toward the exit, Jake staying by Andy's side the whole time.

"Do you want me there when you do it?" Andy asked.

"Yes."

"Are you capable of waiting to do it until this tour is over?" Andy asked.

"Yes. I already miss you, Andy," she said, a hint of desperation in her voice. Andy smiled sadly, because he missed her too.

"I miss you too. Don't worry, though. Six months passes in no time. I'll be home before you know it," he reassured her.

"Okay. Just... be careful, yeah?" She asked, bringing a warm smile to Andy's lips.

"Of course. Anything for you, baby," Andy said. They both told each other goodbye, and Andy hung up.

"What the hell was that about?" Jake asked.

"Casey knows who her mom is," Andy said.

~~

This was a surprise to John. He knew she had been put up for adoption when she was baby, but seeing her how she was currently could've broken his heart.

"John, I don't know if I should see her. I talked to Andy yesterday about it, and he said we could go when he gets back, but that's forever from now," Casey complained. John smiled sadly at her, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"It'll be alright," he told her. She shook her head as tears brimmed her eyes.

"John... what kind of a person does it make me if I told you I regret coming here with Ashley?" Casey asked, not meeting his gaze until the end of her question. He sucked in a breath.

"I wouldn't necessarily say you're a bad person. Everybody gets homesick at least once in their life," he said. But that didn't seem to be a sufficient enough answer for Casey.

"Its not that I'm homesick, John. I just... I regret it. Ashley's been nothing but an asshole. And listen to my language! I never used to be this way, and I miss my old self. I miss my old school, and my hometown. At first, I was ecstatic to move here with Ashley freakin' Purdy! But now.. it sucks. I want to go home," Casey said, allowing her tears to fall. John felt bad for her. She genuinely didn't want to be here.

"I don't know, Casey. This is something you really need to talk to your boyfriend about," John told her.

"That's the thing. I don't want a boyfriend. He wants a relationship... but this... this isn't what I want!" Casey cried desperately. John sighed, pulling Casey into his arms, and he rubbed her back to calm her down.

"Shh. Everything's going to be okay," John whispered, though he hardly believed it himself.

~~

Casey had called Andy after John left, set on telling him her intentions on what she wanted. She liked him, yes, but she wasn't ready for this. Not one ounce of readiness in her body. He picked up, and her heart sped up.

"Hey, baby," he said, and she could sense the smile he adorned. As much as she wanted to smile, she couldn't bring herself to do such a task.

"Andy... I thought it all over. I'm getting an abortion," Casey said, immediately shutting her eyes tight, as if that would make his response easier to bear.

Now Andy wasn't smiling. He knew an abortion was a potential choice of Casey's decision on whether or not she was going to keep the baby or not. He just wasn't ready to actually hear her say she was going through with it.

"Casey..." He trailed off sadly.

"No... d-don't do that to me. I have something else I need to tell you..." She said. Andy almost didn't want to know.

Casey sucked in a deep breath, reopening her eyes.

"I-I... I'm not sure I'm ready for this... for uh... us," she said. That was it. Andy's heart shattered. She was dumping him. Over the phone of all ways to do so. He became angry. All he wanted was a relationship with her, and she was throwing it away. He ground his teeth together as he tried not to make it obvious in front of the guys that something was wrong.

"O-Okay," he stammered. Ashley looked up at him peculiarly. Andy ran a hand through his hair roughly, kicking the bottom of the sofa, not making a sound. He had everyone's undivided attention now.

"Andy, I'm sorry," Casey said thickly.

"There's no need to be. God, Casey what did I do!?" He bellowed, not caring anymore if the guys knew. Casey jumped and gave a quiet shriek at his angry outburst.

"A-Andy... it wasn't you... it was me. I thought it over. I was the one who talked to John, and I made up my mind. I'm going to search out my mother, and if she'll have me, I'm going to be staying with her. If she won't have me, I'm going back to Baltimore," Casey said, her confidence levels rising.

"God damnit, Casey! I love you!" Andy yelled In frustration.

"I know that, but I don't love you. Goodbye, Andrew," she said, and she hung up.

I don't love you. She said it like it was the easiest thing to say. Those four words spilled from her mouth so easily. Andy was cut up. He shoved his phone in his pocket, running now both hands through his hair. He stood there with his head down, anger and frustration bubbling together along with sadness. Then he reeled on Ashley.

"This is your fault! You're the one who went off on her the other day! It's your fault Casey's getting an abortion, you fucker!" Andy growled at him. Ashley stood up, and he gave Andy a glare.

"You think this is my fault? Dude, she ain't my fucking girlfriend. I'm not the one who stuck my dick in her and got her pregnant. This is your mess, you've got to clean it up," Ashley said. Andy's eyes brimmed with tears.

"She's not my girlfriend anymore. She's going to live with either her mom, or go back to Baltimore," Andy said. Ashley raised his eyebrows.

"What?" He asked. Andy sighed, not wanting to further discuss it.

"She knows who her mom is?" Ashley asked.

"Apparently."

Casey was pacing back and forth in the living room, deciding on whether to pack her stuff up first, or after she visited her mom. She decided on the latter, wishing John was here to accompany her. She just let out a breath and headed out the door on foot, printed out directions to her mother's house in her hand. She walked down the street to the intersection, looking up at the street signs, seeing she was far from where she wanted to be. Several miles, at least. She sighed and pulled her phone out of her pocket, calling John to see if he was available.

"Hey, Casey. How are you?" He asked.

"I did it."

"Did what?" He asked her.

"I broke up with him," she said. She heard John exhale on the other end.

"Shit, Casey. I'm still in LA if you need anything- wait. Is that you? Standing at the intersection?" He asked her. Casey squinted in the sunlight, spotting John's car across the street from where she was currently standing. She waved at him and hung up, looking both ways before jogging across the cross walk.

John unlocked his car for her as she neared. She walked around the front, pulling the door open and getting in.

"Hey," he said. She smiled, though it was fake. She was a little bummed about hers and Andy's phone call.

"Where do ya need to go? I'm willin' to take you," John said. Casey handed him the directions she'd printed from Google.

"You know where this is? It's my mom's address," Casey told him. He quickly read it over.

"Yeah. I actually just came from that general direction. You're lucky I'm already in the turn lane, darlin'," John said. She smiled at him, grateful that he was doing this for her. She didn't know how to thank him.

They pulled up in front of the house, Casey's nerves eating her alive.

"Come in with me?" Casey asked John, and he all but obliged. They both walked up to the door together, and Casey hesitantly knocked. Then they both waited an agonisingly slow amount of time before the door had been pulled open. Casey gripped John's hand at the sight of her mother.

"Hi.. uh, can I help you both?" She asked sweetly.

Casey released John's hand and wrung her hands together nervously.

"Hi.. uh... I'm Casey," she said. Her mother raised her eyebrows, her expression slowly becoming one of surprise.

"Casey? Oh my gosh. You're so beautiful. Kelly told you?" She asked. Casey blushed and nodded her head, glancing up at John.

"Oh my god.... c'mon in you two," she ushered them both inside. Casey and John both followed the woman into the kitchen, all of them sitting down in a chair at the table.

"So... mom..." Casey felt weird calling her mother her mom. She hadn't raised her, hadn't been there for her ever. Hell, she'd dropped her on a doorstep.

"Why'd you leave me?" Casey asked, hurt by how she'd felt betrayed and like she wasn't good enough for her own mother. Casey's mom knew this would come eventually.

"Casey... I'm so sorry. Your father and I couldn't afford to raise you. We were broke and on the brink of being homeless. We had no choice," she said, sounding sincere. Casey believed her. She just didn't understand.

"I thought you guys didn't want me," Casey said, looking down at her hands that were resting on the table.

"No. That is the complete opposite. We were in love with you. You were, and quite frankly still are, gorgeous. We wanted to keep you, it's just that we couldn't afford it. Your father tried everything he could to make ends meet, but it just was never enough. He swore that the day he had enough money, we'd bring you home... but he died before we could get that far. I'm so sorry, Casey. I wish I could have been there for you," her mom said. Casey then placed a hand over her belly, feeling all of a sudden guilty about wanting to terminate the little guy or gal. But she knew she couldn't raise a baby on her own.

"Mom... I... I'm pregnant, and I'm really scared," Casey admitted, her voice just above a whisper. John grabbed her hand under the table, giving it a little squeeze.

"Do you know what you want to do with it?" She asked softly. Casey bit her lip.

"I was uh.. actually going to abort it, but what you said made me feel really bad about doing it," she said.

"Don't assume that what I did was the right thing. If you're sure you're not ready for a baby, better to be safe than sorry when the time comes. I'll go with you if you'd like, unless your boyfriend is going to," she said.

"Oh.. John here isn't my boyfriend.. I uh.. I actually just broke up with my boyfriend about thirty minutes ago," Casey said. Her mom nodded, and extended a hand out to John.

"Hi, John. I'm Jenny Marie," she said. All Casey could think about was John's song 'Jenny', and a small smile made its way onto Casey's face.

"Hi, Jenny. It's nice to meet you," John said. Casey loved the way John spoke her name, the slight pronunciation on the 'e' making the name sound even better, as if he was almost singing her name.

"Mom..do you mind if I stay here? I have no place to live," Casey said. Jenny smiled a heartwarming smile.

"Of course, sweetheart. It'll give us a lifetime to catch up on," she said happily. Casey grinned as warm tears filled her eyes. She was so glad she found her mother. Had she not, she'd probably be miserable.

Notes

Wow so hello. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy. And, tell me what you think about the point of view. Should I keep doing it this way, or return to how I was writing it before? Let me know!