Turnings

Let me start from the beginning shall I. Tell you how I managed to get into the black veil brides concert in the first place, as well as Neenah.

It all started with one early birthday present.

Not for me, but I still enjoyed it.

No it was for Neenah. She absolutely adores black veil brides and as I said before wishes she could have Andy Biersacks babies. Like that will ever happen, keep on wishing Neenah.

As I was saying. Because Neenah loves black veil brides so much her mother got her two tickets as an early birthday present seeing as the show was 3 months before her actual birthday.

I don’t think I was the first person she asked to go to the concert. I think she asked Nelly first but then nelly has a really strict mum that won’t let her do anything. Not that she doesn’t do it anyways but still, it’s a point.

I would have thought that she would have asked Scarlet next. However Scarlet doesn’t particularly like their music. Sure she thinks some of the guys are hot in the band, but that doesn’t make her like their music anymore.

So the next obvious choice would be. Well me.

So I was sitting in my schools giant library, when Neenah come in and sits beside me. She says nothing at first. Just gets her books out and everything sorted so she can start her homework.

This is how our conversation went.

I looked over towards Neenah as she sat down beside me.

“Hey” I smiled over at her.

“Hey” she smiled back. “I have something to ask you” she whispers in my ear.

Now me being the great friends I am turn around ready to listen. It might also be the fact that being me I was naturally curious.

“Okay, I’m all ears” I told her.

Now luckily we were near the back of the library, the side with huge windows and a lovely view of the car park beneath it.

I am very happy to say not that many people were in the larary at that time or they would have been disturbed from their ‘work’. Yeah right all they would do is text boys and flap around asking if a certain guy liked them or not.

Anyway I’m going off topic.

“Do you want to go with me to Liverpool to see black veil brides?” she asked me, being completely calm about the whole thing.

And then there’s me.

Whisper screaming my head in a library. What can I say; you have to whisper when you’re in a library. It’s the rules.

If there is anything I am. It is not a rule breaker. Just yet.

Going back on track.

The obvious answer I gave was yes.

So here we are. All the way over in Liverpool, listening to a pretty dam good band.

By the looks of it Neenah was enjoying it very much. Seeing her top it all the way down showing her bra covered breasts. The excuse she gives to me is amusing every time I ask. She always says ‘They need to breath’.

Mine however can hold their breaths for a very, very long time.

Moving on I’m sure you all will want to know what happens. Well here it is.

The guitarists were jumping about and running all over the stage. I think I figured their names out. One is called Ashley, the one that has a hat like a sailor. The other one I think is called jack or is it Jake? Neenah’s going to kill me if she quizzes me later.

The same with Andy the lead singer, as well as the bassist I think his name was something weird like Jip or Jims.

I don’t get how they can have so much energy. I can barely walk up the stairs in my school. Though to be fair, the stairs to get anywhere in my school are 6 flights up and down.

I look toward the guy behind the drum set…oh no I think he’s having a seizer. What do I do? He’s on stage surely other people have noticed this I can’t be the only one.

Oh god what if he dies on stage because of me. I need to get my phone out and phone an ambulance or something. What if I just tell one of the security? They should be able to do something about it. Maybe calm him down or something.

Luckily I’m close to the front of the barrier and there’s a man a few people away that has a giant yellow top on that says security.

Completely forgetting about Neenah who was stretching her top. Dam I wanted to borrow that top.

No Sam not now you have a life to save.

I shove people out the way to try to get to the man. Fortunately I made eye contact with him and he saw that I was maybe panicking a little bit. So he helped me get out of the crowd and near him.

He was a tall muscular bald man so hit wasn’t that hard for him.

“What’s the problem miss?” he asked in a gruff voice whilst holding me out of the way, so I wouldn’t be hit by the overenthusiastic crowd.

“H-he’s having a seizure” I quickly replied with wide eyes.

The man suddenly got very serious. Grabbing both my arms and looking in my eyes.

“Who is? Where is he?” he asked in a calm but sort of panicky way. If that makes sense.

“T-the guy on stage” I stuttered out.

Then the man did something rather rude to me. He laughed in my face. I was soooo tempted to slap him.

“Hey dude why are you laughing when there is a guy having a seizure on stage?” I yelled in his face.

But obviously that didn’t work because he started laughing so hard I think I saw a tear coming out of his right eye.

“Hey this is not funny there is a guy behind the drum kit on stage that is having a seizure you should really call an ambulance or something he could die.” I yelled at him, and being me I am very immature. So I stopped my foot and slammed my arms down to my sides.

This of course attracted attention. Including Neenah’s. I saw her quickly pull up her top to ‘try’ and cover herself up. Didn’t work very well. Then she shoved her way over to me and the ass of a security guard.

“Hey, is everything alright over here?” she asked looking between me and the bastard. I will keep thinking of names to call him that suite him at this very moment.

“No, no there is not there is a guy on stage having a seizure and he’s laughing at me.” I stated.

Then for some unknown reason everyone who was in ear shot started laughing, including Neenah. Such a great best friend.

It was then that I realized the song had stopped. So the hearing range for what I had just said went allot farther seeing as I was basically shouting it out.

“Seriously is anybody going to do anything about the guy?” I demanded. Stamping my foot once again.

Thankfully Neenah managed to get hold of her breath so that she could tell me something.

“Hunny, he’s just really into his music he’s not having a seizure.” and then she continued laughing.

Well. Now I’m embarrassed. Couldn’t somebody have said that sooner rather than it carrying on for ages more?

“Oh, woops. Well I’m just going to go back in the crowd and listen to the rest of the concert then.” And I quickly dispersed back into the crowd, hoping to god that I can just disappear.

I know, I know. I shouldn’t have left Neenah. But she’s a big girl, she’s been to many concerts before. I’m sure she can handle herself.

Song after song I acted as if nothing was wrong. I moved with the crown whilst it was jumping and pumping fists in the air.

I forgot the entire escapade of my embarrassing moment.

I finally felt like I belonged. That nobody would judge me.

But then I felt the guilt seeping through my body.

Here I am thinking that I could be one of them listen to their music and act like them. i shouldn’t really be here.

I look over to see Neenah having the time of her life. Jumping about screaming out the names of Ashley and Andy. Enjoying the music her idols hare making, specifically for their Army.

I don’t see myself as a part of the army. I’m just tagging along with a soldier.

This just made me even guiltier and on the verge of getting slightly depressed.

I need to get out of here.

I shove my way through the crowd putting on a fake cheery smile. Hopefully Neenah won’t know the difference.

Finally I reached her.

“Hey Neenah? I’m just going to the toilet; the concert might be over by the time I’m done because it looks like they’re going to finish soon. So I’ll meet you outside?” I asked her.

“Okay” she said. You could see she was entranced by the music and didn’t actually get any of what I just said.

Oh well. I started to shove my way through the crowd going backwards. Hopefully I can find an exit. I really don’t want to feel the amount of guilt that I am right now. It’s so bad I feel like crying because of it.

I looked up and a sign caught my attention. In big green letters it said exit. Finally I can get out.

After about 5 minutes of shoving people to get out I managed to ram my way through the exit door and out into the open air.

It’s still there. The guilt hasn’t gone. Of course it isn’t going to be gone Sam. Its guilt it will stick with me until I do something constructive to get rid of it. Guilt doesn’t just vanish in seconds.

I looked around to see I had ended up in an ally by the venue. I walked down slightly. Passing door by door that led into what I presume are different rooms inside the venue.

Finally finding a suitable spot, that didn’t have much grime on it. I slumped up against the wall and slid down it. My brand new jacket that I bought for this event, probably being coved in what grime there was on the wall that I didn’t spot.

Resting my head against the wall I could faintly hear the sounds of cheering and a muffled voice in the background.

It must be ending now. What a great ending to my night. The sarcasm was intended.

It will probably take Neenah at least 10-15 minutes to get out of the stadium. I’ll just stay here. Waiting. I closed my eyes just for a moment. I was so tired from what fist pumping and jumping around I did.

Soon by complete accident, I fell asleep. By a wall, in an alley and I’m 15 and defenseless. Fuck.