Sweet Blasphemy

(Time skip, 4 month)
I walked into the kitchen. It has been four months since the guys left and I just felt so lonely. When we started talking I though that I was going to be able to see them and talk to them but I can't. We Skype but its not the same.
"Hey sweetie, why don't you go for a walk?" My mom asked.
"No mom, I think I am just going to take a shower"
TRIGGER WARNING!
She nodded and I walked up to my room. I took my cloths off and walked into the bathroom, I turned the shower on and got in. I washed my hair with shampoo and then I went to pick up my conditioner pot and I saw the blade. I picked it up and held it against my wrist and I made a few cuts. The blood dripped down onto the floor and I stated to cry. Nothing was going right, the guys were gone, everyone hated me.
OKAY, ITS SAFE TO READ NOW :)
Once I was finished washing I walked back into my room and got changed. I wore a jumper to cover my wrist and I just lay down on my bed. I looked at my phone and saw I had a more texts form the guys. I have been ignoring them lately, I just feel as if I am wasting their time. I really did love the guys but I just couldn't face them, especially after breaking my promise to Andy... again. That wasn't the first time. I just felt so ashamed. I turned my phone off and close my eyes until I heard my Skype ringing from my laptop. I walked over to it and sat at my desk chair. I answered the call and saw it was Bell. She looked worried. Over the past couple of months I had, had a thee way Skype call with her and they guys, she really wanted to meet them and they wanted to meet her. They started to talk to her without me and became friends. They even got her a backstage pass to one of their shows in England.
"Hey..." I said shyly.
"Hi, what's going on, why aren't you answering the guys?" She asked, I just looked up at her and a tear ran down my cheek.
"I... Please don't tell Andy..." I whisperd and she nodded. I pulled up my sleeve to reveal my wounds. Her mouth opened.
"Oh, Blade... listen I feel really bad but it's 11 hear and I have to go, but I will text you when I can, Okay?" She said looked worried. I just nodded and ended the call.
Andy's p.o.v
I was pacing around the room. Blade had been ignoring all of us and when we last spoke to Bell she said that Blades will end up ignoring her for months and when she finally answers her, she has done something. I told Bell to get hold of her and find out what's wrong. Ashley's phone rang and he picked it up, hoping it was Blade but it was just Bell.
"Hello, Bell? Did you talk to her?" He asked
"Okay... What's up?... WHAT!?... Okay... Yeah... sure I will let them know... Bye..." Ash hung up and called everyone into the room.
"That was Bell... she has spoken to Blade..." He began. I nodded.
"She... cut herself..." He said before breaking down in tears.
"I don't know why, I mean, I didn't even know she did in the first place..." He sobbed. I felt so bad because I did.
"Guys... I did. That first night we met her she told me that she did but I made her promise me that she would never do it again." I said a tear running down my face.
"We have to call her... NOW!" said CC.

Notes

Oh gosh XD
I will be updating more today once I have finished my homework
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