Run Away Before It's Too Late

All throughout my life, I have been abused, taken advantage of, used, manipulated everything. Why? I don't know what I did to deserves this. Oh wait, yes I do. I'm worthless. Excuse me for forgetting it temporarily.
My family abused me since the day I got home from the hospital. When I was 2, my grandfather, father, uncle, and their friends started to molest me. When I turned four, they began to anally raped me. The never raped me vaginally thankfully. So technically, I'm still a virgin...I suppose.
I started bruising myself at the age of two. I progressed to other manners of self harm at a rapid rate at such a young age. Yeah, I'm fucked up. I'll admit it. I've attempted suicide countless times. I've always failed as you can so obviously tell
I started drinking alcohol at the age of seven. Somehow, no matter the type of alcohol or how much I drank, I never got drunk. Sadly. I started doingg drugs when I was eight. With that, the same thing that happened with alcohol, happened with the drunks. So sad, right?
I never had any friends growing up. I was the freak. And I still am one. Teachers never realized that I was abused at both home and school. They probably didn't care anyway. After all, why would they? I'm just worthless.
I have my on blade, razor, and knife collection. I started it when I first started cutting. I also have a lighter collection. Gotta keep my options open after all. I'm a major fan of rock, metal, alternative, etc. I just love loud music. especially if it's meaningful.
I have multiple disorders. Like I said, I'm fucked up. Oh, I forget to mention, didn't I? I'm repulsive as fuck. Suicidal and ready to die still. Yay. Now I'm in an orphanage.

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