My Fallen Angel

"The show is tomorrow!" Francis announced, pacing back and forth across the stage, his hands clasped in front of him.
Well.
"Now, we have all been working so very hard, and everyone has been doing exceptional! I want to thank Kenna," he glanced at where I stood, my arms crossed over the ridiculous outfit I was wearing. "For agreeing to be our evil queen last minute, and working so hard to learn the routine in just a matter of weeks!"
I forced a smile at the round of mandatory applause.
I was just glad I could fit into their ridiculous costume.
It was a deep red, the top a corset that brought my breasts almost to my chin, and sparkles ran across them glittered annoyingly every movement I made beneath the lights; the skirt was awful short, in my opinion. It was thick, flowed outward, and the sleeves were skin tight and looked like black vines crawling down my arms.
Fitting, considering I knew the black veins would show up now and then.
Not that the humans could see them anyway.
They had a crown laced into my hair where it was braided into a tight bun, and a high collar would tie around my shoulders for the beginning scenes, where a long red cape would trail behind me when I was carried in.
Ashlandil would just be thrilled when he saw they would have to toss me around during the fight scene.
Especially since he'd made it very clear that he didn't want me in any dangerous stunts.
Well, it wasn't technically dangerous, in my opinion, because I knew they would be catching me.
They had so far, so what was the odds they would drop me last minute?
And none of them knew I was pregnant.
Francis had made it a point to me that it would probably be best not to mention my pregnancy until the show was completely finished, that it would probably complicate things; meaning, he was afraid the producers wouldn't let me perform.
I wasn't foolish, I knew what his real concerns were.
And, well, I had noticed that the costume, which had fit snugly a few weeks ago anyway, had taken two people to lace me into before rehearsal had started; it was a good thing the show was tomorrow, otherwise I doubted I would be able to fit in it.
The little peanut was growing quicker then expected.
Ugh!
I didn't just use Ashlandil's stupid nickname!
"And, I'll see all of you tomorrow morning!" Francis called, pulling me out of my thoughts, and I realized I'd missed his entire speech.
Wonderful.
Now my mind was traveling more then usual.
I sighed as I followed the rest of the crew off the stage, heading for the dressing rooms.
I couldn't wait to get out of this costume, I could barely breathe!
I was so nervous, though; I couldn't believe the show was tomorrow.
When I would look off the stage, the empty seats of the auditorium would actually be filled, thousands of people watching --- Ashlandil watching.
I hoped he wasn't too bored, that he didn't fall asleep.
Knowing him, he probably would.
And...
Would Andy come?
He'd said he would before all.... before everything had happened. I'd been so excited, hearing that all the guys would come to the show, knowing that someone in the crowd (other then Ashlan, of course) would be out there to support me, even if something went wrong and I fumbled.
Which, of course, was possible.
I was an angel, but I wasn't perfect.
Obviously I'd made so many mistakes.
And I couldn't fix any.
Like this baby.
Of course it wasn't a mistake, but it wasn't something I had ever planned on; it would be better if I wasn't pregnant, I knew that.
And Iriel was right.
The baby would be safer in a cathedral, away from the dangers of other angels, demons --- itself, for that matter.
What would it be like?
Would it lean more towards its angelic side?
More human?
Evil?
Iriel had me worried now.
But then Ashlandil...
Well, he and every other angel out there had been dark before, had done awful things, but they had come back from it, had tried to do better; why would our child be any different?
So, I suppose, it didn't matter if it was evil, good --- or somewhere in between, it would be my child, and I would care for it and love it to the best of my ability.
As would Ashlandil.
And Andy would never have to know a thing.
Well...
Andiel would.
But I wasn't sure if --- dammit!
I wished I could forget all about Seraphine, all the awful things she told me, and just strictly believe what Andiel had said, how she had taken his words and twisted them and ---.
I just didn't know what to believe.
Angels weren't all pure and loyal to God like I had thought they were; I had always thought if you were in Heaven, you were loyal, you were pure --- but now, being down here, amongst everyone... that wasn't true.
We weren't perfect.
We were just like the humans.
The only thing that separated us from being human was that we were created first, tasked with being their caretakers, that we had powers and could live forever.
Or, at least, until the end of days.
Which now I never wanted to come.
Because I was going to have a child, and I did not want it to live through the horrors that the end would no doubt bring.
I wanted it to be safe.
And if it meant going dark myself just to make that so, then I would gladly do so.
As would Ashlandil.
"You were wonderful out there, Kenna!"
Huh?
I glanced over, seeing the "white princess" smiling at me as she changed out of her costume.
"Thanks, you were too! Are you excited for tomorrow?"
"Of course! But I'm also so nervous," she admitted, letting her blonde hair fall out of its braid and down her shoulders. "Like you wouldn't believe! This is my first show where I'm actually a lead."
"I wouldn't be too nervous," I responded, giving her a smile. "It's exactly like rehearsal, just with more people watching."
"You make it sound almost easy," she sighed.
"Well, I wouldn't say easy," I chuckled, relieved when the costume directer finally released the strings of the corset and I could relax. "I'm nervous too, but I'm excited. We've been working so hard on this, I can't wait to finally perform."
"Your boyfriends coming, isn't he? The rockstar?"
"Yes. He's seen pieces of the rehearsals, but not enough to have any idea what's happening," I sighed, lifting my arms obediently when directed.
"He sure is clingy to be a rockstar," she commented, already slipping into her normal clothes. "I heard Francis grouching because he was at a lot of your sessions back at the studio, he'd barely let you out of his sight."
"Ashley's... protective," I said, choosing my words carefully as I finally shed the costume. "He just wants to make sure I'm safe; being his girlfriend has a lot of repercussions, especially when there's ---."
"Crazy fans?"
Sure.
We could go with that.
"Exactly."
More like angels hell-bent on getting a little revenge, but...
"Well, I'll see you tomorrow," she said, giving me another bright smile before trotting outside, wearing the most comfortable clothes I had ever seen.
I was still wearing half my costume.
I hated it.
It wouldn't hurt my feelings if something happened to it between now and tomorrow and they had to put me in a duck suit.
"Alright, now you can step up," the costume director informed me, and I did quickly, the skirt falling off easily now that it wasn't practically sewn into my skin.
Thank God.
I huffed as I reached for my other clothes, not really caring that I was half naked, either; I wasn't ashamed of my body, I saw no point in it, not now, anyway.
Not when I would look like this for eternity.
A lot of the other performers didn't seem shy either, stripping completely naked in the changing rooms, changing into their other clothes like not another person was even there.
So why should I be concerned?
So when I finally was able to pull on a slim pair of jeans and a loose shirt, a hoody over that, I was beyond happy.
Except my hair was still in its braided mess, and my face was covered in its evil queen makeup.
So I completely wouldn't look strange on my way home.





I sighed as I fumbled with the door lock, my stupid keys jingling loudly; it was getting close to midnight, I was beyond tired, and I swear if the stupid door didn't just ----.
Open.
There.
I nudged it open, frowning when I heard voices from the kitchen.
"Kenali, babe, you're --- wow."
I glanced over, seeing Ashlandil was leaning against the counters, and CC, of all people, stood across from him, an overnight bag at his feet.
"What?"
"Just, um ---," Ashlandil stared at me, his brows disappearing into his hair as I dropped my bag and kicked it to the couch, tired of carrying it around.
"You look frightening with all that makeup," CC finished for him, grinning as he looked at me. "Is that for your show?"
"No, I just thought I'd wear it like this from now on and see how people like it."
"Don't mind her," Ashlandil sighed, shaking his head. "Pregnancy makes her bitchier then usual."
"Ashlan!"
CC chuckled, sitting down on one of the barstools.
"It's cool. And, uh, I hope you don't mind, but I was gonna crash here, just for tonight."
"That's fine," I yawned, walking towards the kitchen, my eyes centering on the refrigerator. "The couch pulls out, if ---."
"He's slept over a lot before," Ashlandil sighed, watching as I opened the fridge and started pawing through its contents.
I was craving like three different things at once.
I wanted nachos, strawberries, and cake.
Strawberry cake.
Did we have that?
"Why are you getting cheese and strawberries out?" CC asked, a horrified look on his face as I started to pile the counter with random foot items, at least to him. "Ash, is she serious ---?"
"Don't question the woman and her cravings," Ashlandil muttered, shaking his head; yeah, he'd already made that mistake. "I find it's best to just move out of the way. Beer?"
"That would be fucking great."
Good.
More kitchen space for me.
I glanced at them, and then shoved everything on the counter.
Okay.
Chips, cheese, those are some olives, um....
Salsa?
"Do we have salsa?"
"It's in the fridge door."
Ah!
Salsa!


Ashlandil

"What the hell is she making?" CC asked, staring at Kenali as she moved around the kitchen, mumbling under her breath to herself; that extreme makeup really made her look different, more...
Seraphine-ish.
Kenali had never been one for makeup, I generally either did it for her or made her wear it --- but it really did make a difference.
She was beautiful without it, especially to human men with her angelic draw --- and her sin, of course --- and makeup only seemed to enhance that.
"Like I have any idea. The other night she was layering strawberries on top of Fritos."
CC grimaced.
"Ashlandil, you always pick the weird ones, I swear. Your kid is going to be eating the weirdest shit when he gets some teeth."
"Or her!"
"Or her," CC said quickly, glancing at Kenali. "It could be a girl, too. But I think Ash is probably gonna have a boy. Like, twelve."
She snorted at that.
"What? You don't wanna have twelve, strong, manly mini-Ashleys?"
"I can barely deal with one Ashley," Kenali laughed, shaking her head, her hair starting to fall out of its intense hold on the back of her head.
Why was her chest so glittery?
It's like someone had sprayed her with a can of glitter, I could see it sparkling all the way from the couch; and even though she was wearing a normal t shirt, it did show some cleavage.
Glittery, glittery cleavage.
Huh.
I wonder...
"Er, so have you guys thought of any baby names yet?" CC asked after a moment, propping his feet on the coffee table as he popped the tab on his beer. "Like, are you gonna name it AJ or something? Or Ashley, since it's possible it could be a girl?"
"Uh, we.... haven't given it much thought," I said after a minute, shrugging. "We got a long way to go, anyway. We've both been too busy to talk about it."
I wasn't ready to reveal the baby's boy name, anyway.
It was... personal.
So when we were ready, when we knew if it was a boy or a girl, then we could decide.
But, until then, it stayed with us.
Kenali glanced at me from the kitchen, a mixing bowl and a box of cake mix out in front of her.
Did she even know how to use the oven?
I honestly doubted I'd ever used the oven.
"What are you doing?"
"Making a cake."
Ahuh.
I could see that.
"What kind of cake?"
"Strawberry."
Why did we even have cake mix?"
"Why ---?"
"Do you want to run out to the store and buy me a strawberry cake?" she almost snapped at me, looking annoyed. "No? Well, shut the fuck up and let me figure out how to make one then!"
Okay.
Welp.
Don't bother Kenali when she was trying to learn to make cake.
Got it.
"Ouch," CC chuckled, grinning slightly. "Mama Bear is serious, huh?"
"You have no idea," I sighed, rubbing my face. "And she's not even that far pregnant yet."
"How long until you know if the baby's a boy or girl?"
"A couple more weeks. She'll need to be around four or five months before they can tell."
"Ahuh. I'm surprised they're letting her perform, knowing she's pregnant," CC commented, scratching his head. "Don't they have shit about that? Because of the stunts they have to do?"
"Kenali's not doing any stunts," I responded instantly, huffing. "I made that clear. And the directer was desperate, the play was in a few weeks and their lead or whatever broke her ankle or toe or something. Kenali volunteered and they had no choice but to take her."
"Ash, you make it sound like I'm awful!" Kenali suddenly burst, and I blinked as I turned to look at her, seeing her huffy expression. "They didn't have to take me at all! I actually know what I'm doing!"
"Er, that's what I meant, of course. They thought you were the best dancer they'd ever seen, they couldn't live without you," I agreed hastily, flushing. "That's what I meant."
Jesus.
If she was going to be like this forever, I couldn't imagine the next couple months.
Well, at least I'd get to miss some of it, right?
Hopefully.
If my little tantrum hadn't fucked the idea of Warped up.
I didn't want to leave her, though, not in her condition; she wouldn't really be able to protect herself or the child when she was about to pop it out, so if there was some kind of physical altercation --- and there wasn't one angel I trusted on this earth to protect her, either.
Especially not Iriel.
Not after the stunt he'd pulled the other day.
Kenali didn't want him near the baby, she was getting bad vibes, so I took her intense mothering instincts to heart.
He wouldn't be near the baby if I had to rip him to pieces.
End of story.
I just hoped it didn't come to that.
I knew what he was saying, I got it, the point.
But there....
We were gonna raise that baby like it was normal, not like it was some freak of nature that needed to be locked up or some shit. It would be raised like a mortal kid was --- so long as it didn't come out with horns or powers too quick.
Then probably home schooling would be the best option.
But, of course it was going to school, otherwise.
A private school, not some public bullshit one, either.
An expensive one.
With good security.
So it would be safe.
I wouldn't go so far as to send it to boarding school, Kenali would never have it, letting the child so far out of her sight and neither would I.
Without going so far as to installing a fucking camera in its forehead, anyway.
She was going to be one mother you didn't mess with.
I liked that, though.
She was protective already, even before all this, but now...
Damn.
Someone had accidentally bumped me the other day and she'd looked like her head was about to explode,; and I obviously needed no protecting.
But, I had to admit, if only to myself, it was nice knowing she would rip anothers womans eyes out if she so much as looked at me the wrong way.
Kind of meant she cared, right?
She might say she loves me, but she was hormonal, not to mention still had the black veins which sensed my own emotions, so I was never sure it was really her or not.
I hoped the black veins didn't affect the baby.
I had never heard of an angel being pregnant and suffering the disease at the same time.
Of course, not many female angels fell, and not many of them were irresponsible enough to get knocked up by a mortal, either.
But lucky Kenali...
And to make it worse, it was by him.
I think I would have been more accepting if it had been by some random mortal she'd never see again.
At least then she might have consented to getting rid of the peanut before it caused a problem.
There was no point dwelling on it, though.
Not now.
"Do you even know how to turn the oven on?"
"Of course I know how to turn the oven on, Ashley."
"Are you sure? Excuse me if I don't want my apartment burning down."
"Just let me do this, okay!?"
"Bro, I think you better just let her do it," CC chuckled. "Before I wake up and find you gutted or something in the morning."
He had a point.
Better not push my luck.
But, seriously.
"Are you sure you know what you're doing?"

Notes

So, because I suck at describing outfits, here is basically what Kenali's outfit would look like.

And makeup: