Make Me Feel Alive

It was Monday and he hadn't called, I brooded. Why no call? Or even a text? Why does it matter? All we did was make out. We could have done more if he hadn't got a call.
I sighed.
"Ms. Tate," I looked over, seeing Mr. Wireman and his twisty mustache step to my desk. "Can you type up these notes for me and have them on my desk before you leave tonight?"
"Sure." I took his notes, which looked like chicken scratch. "They'll be done."
"So, how are you doing today, Morgan? You look like you don't feel well." he peered at me, or more like down my shirt.
"Um, I'm fine," I swiveled my chair to face the computer. "I'll have these to you soon."
He nodded, taking his que and leaving, and I let my breath go.
He made me nervous.
I grabbed up the notes, and frowned, trying to figure them out. What did he mean about potatos?
This was going to take me all day.
I felt my phone buzz and glanced down. Ugh, what did he want?

Can you meet me at Caffienators later? Need to talk.

Yeah, but I don't want to talk to you, I thought in annoyance. All Trevor needed to do was come by and get his things, and we were done. Maybe he just needed a push.
I get off at 5, I finally texted him back. I would see him and tell him to get his stuff and then we wouldn't have to keep having this conversation. So, hours later after I'd typed what I could make out of those notes and gove them back, I met Trevor at the coffee shop.
Reluctantly.
I could see him sitting in one of the center tables, unlike Ashley who tried to keep a low profile. I walked over to the table. At least I looked really nice today, heels and everything. I had maybe hopped Ashley would call or something, but...
"Hey," Trevor nearly fell out of his chair as he leapt to greet me. "Morgan! You made it."
"Obviously. What do you want?" I was in no mood to be Pushover Morgan today.
"Please, sit," he even pulled out my chair for me. I hesitated, then sighed, slipping into it. He sat down across from me, looking anxious.
"Im sorry," he said immediately. "For everything. How I reacted the other day, not calling, always being late and taking advantage of you --- I'm so sorry!"
I just looked at him through my nerdy glasses.
"Can you forgive me? I mean, I get it if you don't want to be together again, I do, but I don't want our friendship to suffer."
"Friendship? Trevor, we didn't even start off as friends." I shook my head. "What is up with the sudden conscious and why is it just now kicking in? I could really have needed this a month ago before you became such an ass. Look, I get that you're almost done with school and all, and you're stressed, but ---."
"Morgan, please. I just," he suddenly sighed. "I want to make it up to you. I didn't realize how awful I was being until I saw you with that other guy."
"He just drove me home."
"But he shouldn't have had too! I shouldve been there and I know it. It shouldn't have taken me seeing you with another guy to realize all this."
"I already know all of this, what is your point?" I was getting annoyed.
"Just don't lose my number, okay? If you ever need me, for anything, call me or text me. Or if Toby needs anything," he said hastily when I pulled the strap of my purse on my shoulder.
"Trevor, you hate Toby."
"We just didn't get along. He's hateful."
Well, I couldn't disagree with him. I glanced at the door as it opened, and felt my stomach drop.
So that's why he hadn't called. I looked away quickly, ducking my head and letting my hair flow forward to hide my face. Ashley and the blonde woman walked by cluelessly, laughing about something, and I let my breath go as they didn't notice me.
I had to get out of here.
"I gotta go," I muttered, standing abruptly.
"Wha --- don't you want a coffee or something?" Trevor asked, a desperate expression on his face as he looked up at me. "We can talk a bit longer."
"No," I bit the word out, and then I was striding to the door, ignoring him as he called after me. I made it to the sidewalk before he caught up with me, grabbing my arm and whirling me around.
"We need to talk this out!" Trevor snapped at me, his grip firm on my arm. "You can't just walk away from me and ignore me!"
"Why not? You do it to me all the time!" I snapped at him, straining away.
I just had to get out of here, it was all I could think about. Here I was, pining away like some idiot, and he already had someone new and blonde and tan and interesting, and --- I didn't even know why I was so upset about it. I'd been dating Trevor for months and it was hardly phasing me that we were breaking up, but I'd been expecting it and I'd cried my eyes out when he'd flipped on me before.
So.
"Just let go of me!" I demanded angrily. We were on a sidewalk full of people, you'd think someone would intervene, or he would be like 'oh, we're in a public place, better not show my ass', but I wasn't that lucky.
"Not until we talk this out!" he insisted, and I glared at him.
"What so you possibly want to talk about? You're not the least bit upset we're breaking up. You're upset because you look bad. That's all it is." I tried to tug out of his grip. "Now let me go or I'll fucking cause the biggest scene you have ever seen!"
"I suggest you do as she says."
We both looked over, and I stiffened. I didn't need his help. Trevors hand grew lax on my arm, and I pulled away, taking a few steps to distance myself from him and Ashley.
I rubbed where he'd had a grip on me to start back my circulation.
"Look, I don't think this is any of your business," Trevor snapped. "This is between me and my girlfriend."
I rolled my eyes. "Ex girlfriend. We're not dating anymore, Trevor. Done, remember?"
"Morgan," he sighed.
"Don't you get that condescending tone!" I snapped; I was pissed off and if he wanted a public fight I was more then willing to give it to him. "If you want your stuff you can get it out of the dumpster."
I turned on my heel and stalked toward the end of the block.
"Morgan!" Trevor shouted after me. "Fine! Leave! But you'll come running back to me for help when the rest of those loans come in and you can't afford to live there anymore!"
I stiffened, and sent him the most vile look I could possibly muster over my shoulder, but I didn't stop walking. I'd missed the bus because of him, and the next one didn't come for a couple hours, so I could either wait or walk, and I didn't feel like hanging around all day.
I managed to make it across the crosswalk and about a block before I started running on fumes.
I slowed in dread.
I lived several blocks from here, and I was in heels. Did I really think I could make it all the way home without dying? I would be better off just to turn around and go wait at the bus station.
I sighed, and stood uncertainly a moment. I didn't need him, I wouldn't go running back to him. I didn't need anyones help. I'd been making it so far on my own since I was twenty, and life had never just given me anything.
If he thought --- I would rather live in a box woth Toby then ever go back to him for help.
My phone buzzed, and I fished it out of my purse. What did Ashley want?
"Hello?"
"Morgan! Where are you?"
"What? What does it matter?" I glanced around, then took a few steps back to lean against the brick wall behind me.
"I've been looking everywhere for you! You can't walk home, I'll drive you."
I scowled. "I'm fine, thanks. I don't need a ride."
"You're wearing heels."
"What's your point? Look, thanks for stepping up back there, but I didn't need your help. And I don't need it now."
There was a minute of silence.
"I'll put you in the trunk if I have to."
"Please," I rolled my eyes. "I'm just gonna get a cab, so don't stress yourself out." I was lying through my teeth, I couldn't afford a cab.
"Then why aren't you in one now?"
I frowned, and glanced around. I narrowed my eyes, and pushed away from the building as I saw him halfway to me.
I ended the call and dropped my phone in my purse, squaring off with him as he stopped in front of me, slipping his own phone in his back pocket.
"Why are you following me?"
"I told you, you can't run off and walk home in those heels, as nice as they may be. I know where you live, Morgan, and it's gonna take you hours. Just let me drive you."
"I'll get a cab!"
"Then get one!" he challenged, and I pressed my lips together.
Dammit.
"Aren't you forgetting your blonde friend?" Maybe I could distract him. "Doesn't she need your attention more then me?"
"Angie? No, she's fine." he frowned at me. "Now are you going to come with me or am I going to have to drag you?"
I just looked at him. I dared him to try to drag me anywhere I didn't want to go.
He narrowed his eyes. "I'll walk you all the way home if you don't let me drive."
"I don't need you following me, Ashley. I can make it home just fine."
"I'm not giving you a choice, Morgan."
I glared at him.
"Fine," I said after a minute. "Fine."
"Good, then come on." He turned to start walking, and I followed him begrudgingly. We walked in complete silence to his car, and I sighed as I shut the passenger door. I buckled immediately, remembering last time, and Ashley almost immediately turned into traffic. I crossed my arms, sliding down slightly in my seat.
"Are you really going to sulk because I'm driving you home?"
"No." I glanced over at him. "I just don't see why you are."
He glanced at me, and then slipped his sun glasses on, hiding his eyes. "Are you mad because I had to leave Friday?"
"No, this has nothing to do with that."
"Then why are you being so sulky?"
"I'm not being sulky!" I glared at him. "You just caught me at a bad time is all."
"Right. What were you doing there with him?"
"It's none of your business." Just stop talking to me, I just wanna go home and cry. I pressed my lips together, staring steadily out the window. I was starting to feel more embarrassed now then anything, especially how childish I was acting, but I couldn't seem to help myself.
Ashley abruptly swerved, and I yelped, grabbing onto the door handle as he stomped the brake.
"What are you doing?" I demanded as we stopped in a random parking lot. He turned the car off and swiveled in his seat, but I couldn't tell if he was glaring at me or not.
"Talk, right now, and get over the bitchiness."
I narrowed my eyes, seeing my reflection in his sunglasses. "Trevor wanted to talk everything out is all, that was why I was there. Not that it should even matter."
"Well it does matter when you're taking it out on me!" he snapped. "I'm just trying to be nice here, Morgan. If we have a problem ---."
"We don't have a problem," I sighed, running a hand through my hair, deflating slightly. "I'm sorry. I'm pissed off at Trevor and I'm taking it out on you."
"Why does that not sound that sincere?"
"Do you want me to play a harp to make it more believable?"
He frowned, then pulled off his sunglasses, letting them dangle in his hand. "So there's no problem here then?"
"No, there's not." I glanced out the window, and then back at him. "So am I walking home or are you driving?"
"See, you say there's no problem, but I'm sensing an attitude." Now he was just being annoying.
"Hey," he reached over, putting his hand on my knee where I'd twisted around to face him, "How about we take up our raincheck this week, huh?"
"I have to work," I hesitated, glad he was changing the subject. "I can't really do much through the week."
"Okay, so, what day is good for you?"
"Saturday."
"Fine, then Saturday we hang out and, hopefully," he walked his fingers up to the hem of my skirt, which at this angle was several inches up my thigh, "we can make up for lost time."
"Do we have to do it at my place?" I sighed. "I'm still digging popcorn out of my couch."
He looked a tad embarrassed. "I didn't expect a movie with the name Fragile to actually be like that, okay? I figured it was like a gentle slasher movie or something."
I shook my head, my lips twitching. "I don't go for gentle movies."
"You don't do anything gently," he answered, and I smiled despite myself.
"Says the guy who drives like he has a death wish." Ashley grinned, and he leaned across the center console, his hand slipping beneath the hem of my skirt.
"We're in a parking lot!" I grabbed his wrist, stopping him. "In broad daylight."
"Trust me, I've done a lot worse."
"Ashley!"
He grinned, and then pressed his lips against mine, his hand raising to cup my face and hold me still. I hesitated, but why the hell not? I literally had nothing to lose.
I kissed him back, taking control of the kiss and burying my hand in his hair, and I felt his surprise. He let me, his hand sliding down to my waist, bunching in the material of my dress.
I tugged on his lip with my teeth, and after a moment his hand slipped back down to my legs, slipping under the hem again and trailing between my thighs, and I shifted, allowing him more leeway, my free hand trailing down his chest.
He suddenly pulled away with a moan, and I opened my eyes, seeing his brown eyes burning. "You keep this up and we'll never make it to your apartment," he breathed, and I chuckled.
"We better hurry then," I murmured, pressing a kiss to his jaw and working my way down his neck, avoiding the silver chain he wore.
"Hold that thought for ten minutes," he muttered, pulling away from me to start the car back up.
Good, now as long as I didn't think about it, we were good to go.

Notes

Leave a comment and tell me what you think! I'll probably update the "rest" of this later today.