Unsung Heroes

Monday morning was a tough one. I had to get up at two am to pack and go to my flight. But when I woke up, Ash tried to pin me to the bed when I had to get up and change into my clothes.
“Ash,” I whisper-grunted. “I have to go get on a plane.”
He whined. “No, you don’t. I don’t want you to go.” He sounded so miserable.
I smiled. “I know,” I ruffled his messy hair affectionately.
He cuddled up to my bare chest, evidence of what we did last night. He snuggled into my boobs and looked up at me sleepily, only one of his eyes, half open, was visible. That was strangely adorable and I had to resist the urge to "aw".
Pushing him away, I reached down and picked up my underwear off the ground and pulled them on – Ash making a noise of complaint in the process – and slipped out of the bunk. Reaching down, I picked my bra up off the ground and slipped it on, grabbing a Rolling Stone shirt I’d set out the night before and my black skinny jeans. I sat down on the bunk to put on my socks and combat boots. I felt Ash sit up behind me, watching me.
“I wish you didn’t have to go so soon.” He said it so quietly I had to almost strain to hear him.
I turned to see he’d moved to me behind me, propped up on his arm with his head almost on my shoulder.
Smiling faintly, I kissed his cheek affectionately and rested my forehead against his face. “I don’t want to go, either. But I need my job. I need to be able to support myself, and that job makes me able to do so. If I stay, I could lose my job, and my apartment.”
Ashley pulled me closer to him so that I was resting more against his bare chest. “I know, but that doesn’t mean that I have to like it.”
Pulling myself up, I grabbed my packed bags from the ground and my phone, which I’d left charging overnight. Ash moved to the edge and pulled on a pair of sweatpants, opting to go without underwear, and then stood up to follow me out. Unfortunately, Maya and I had to take a taxi to the airport because the guys had interviews and events to do pretty early in the morning.
Walking through the bus, I came upon Maya putting on her shoes and Jinxx putting the last of her stiff in her carryon bag. They looked just as miserable as we did.
“I wish we could stay longer,” I offered to Jinxx quietly. “We’ll be back before you know it.”
He looked at me and half-smiled. “No, because all Ash and I are going to do is count the days until you’re here again.”
Maya doesn’t like it when people, boys especially, pine after her. It’s not that she doesn’t appreciate the attention or the fact that they’re devoted (unless they turn stalker and then she beats them up) it’s that she doesn’t like that they stop everything going on in their own lives to focus on hers. She’d rather they missed her but got on with their day until she saw them again.
When Jinxx said this, I knew exactly what was going to happen. Maya, who’d been adjusting her hair in a mirror opposite Jinxx’s bunk, paused at his words, and turned to put her hands on her hips. Then she moved to take his face in her hands and force him to look up at her.
“No, that’s not going to happen because you’re going to give 110% at every show and interview and meet and greet you do, and enjoy yourself, because all I will be doing is working my ass off so that I can see you more and I can’t do that if you’re just going to be miserable.” She kissed his nose.
His smile grew wide and he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her in so that his face was pressed into her stomach. She rested her arms around his shoulders and let him cuddle her.
Picking up my bag, I moved to gently bump her with my hip. “Maya,” I said quietly since Jake and CC were sleeping right there. “I hate to break up this little moment, but we have a flight to catch and then we gotta go to work.”
Maya sighed deeply, and Jinxx let go of her so he could stand and follow us out to the cab. Quietly, the four of us slipped past everyone and moved out of the bus. Ash and Jinxx were carrying our suitcases and Maya and I had out carryon bags. Mine was my backpack and Maya’s was her giant handbag. With the other hand, both of them were holding our hands securely. Ash didn’t say anything this whole time, just holding my hand and rubbing the back of it with his thumb, occasionally bringing my hand up to kiss the back of it.
“I don’t know if I can wait two weeks,” Ash finally said after saying nothing the whole way to the tour exit, and we were standing waiting for the cab.
“Me either.” Jinxx pulled Maya close and rubbed the small of her back.
I set my bag down on the sidewalk and turned to Ash so I could put my hands on his chest. “We still have phones and Skype, Ash. It’s not impossible to talk to each other while you’re away.”
Pouting his lower lip, he rubbed my sides. “I’d still rather you stayed here.”
Jinxx nodded in agreement, and Maya smiled sympathetically and kissed him gently.
A sudden honking startled us as a yellow taxi cab pulled up next to us and the driver, a balding man in his forties, got out.
“Good morning,” he said brightly. “May I help you with your bags, ladies?”
“Sure.” Jinxx and Ash handed him our suitcases, and then turned to us.
I felt my heart sink as I knew I wouldn’t be able to be with him until Friday in two weeks. That thought alone was pretty depressing, but I think what made it more depressing was that I had to spend basically all of that time working and trying to protect Maya from Mitch.
Maya threw herself at Jinxx, who hugged her tightly. I basically did the same thing, but Ash tangled his hands into my hair and pulled me in for a kiss, which I returned with great enthusiasm.
Maya and Jinxx were talking quietly to each other for a moment before they pecked quickly and Maya moved to get into the cab, Jinxx watching her sadly. I pulled away enough to kiss Ash’s cheek.
“I’m going to miss you so much,” he said softly. “I want you to call me when you get in, even if I don’t answer, leave a voicemail, just so I don’t have to worry. And promise me you’ll tell me if that asshole ex of yours tries anything.” His voice was very firm, so I decided to agree, nodding to show him that, and kissed him.
“I love you,” I said, and moved to pick my backpack back up from the ground.
“I love you, too.” We hugged quickly, but tightly, and I moved away so that I could get into the cab, putting my backpack between me and Maya.
Ash and I didn’t say good bye, and we didn’t because neither of us liked them.
Jinxx shut the door behind me, and the cab driver, who by this point was already in the driver seat, started the car. As the car moved away from the curb, we both turned our heads to see our long, black haired, tattooed boyfriends wearing only sweatpants and sandals standing on the curb, watching us leave.
“I’m gonna miss this,” Maya said sadly, looking down at her hands. “I wish we didn’t have to work like this.”
Sighing in agreement, I crossed my arms. “Yeah, but what can we do? I tried going to college, and dropped out before I could do anything because my brain was going to fry from all the stress that was causing me. I was having so many panic attacks Mitch was afraid I’d eventually die from them.”
Maya looked at me with a raised eyebrow. “Yeah, but you were doing so well! You’re smart, Indy, you could totally go to school and actually have a real job! You were going to such a good school, too, why would you give that up?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know, I don’t really like learning in that kind of environment. I’m more of a learn-on-the job type of person. I was getting a degree in communications, it’s not like I couldn’t do that elsewhere.”
Maya sat and thought for a while. “Why don’t you do a vlog series, like Jake? I bet people will want to watch what happens in the lives of the Black Veil Brides from your perspective, and you can answer questions about your relationship with Ash.”
I shrugged. “I don’t know, maybe. I mean, it’s something I would have to make time for, and I don’t really have the time to do that with work because I work basically all day except on weekends. Only would it work if I dropped everything to devote myself to a show that probably wouldn’t work in the first place, and that’s only if it got a ton of attention right away.”
Maya shrugged. “You never know. You could do a couple test videos and have Ash announce it somehow and you post links of them, and just see how it goes. You don’t have to devote anything to it, right away. You could just do a test episode and see how it goes. Announce it on your twitter and stuff though so that the BVB people who follow you can see it.”
Sighing, I pushed on my aviator sunglasses and pulled my hood up as we neared the airport.
“Sure, why not?”

By the time we got to Los Angeles, I was done with traveling for a while. Maya and I were stared at the entire time we were in the airport in Little Rock. I could hear some of the remarks as people walked by, but I tried not to pay them any mind. Maya looked a little more afraid, cowering into my side. We must have looked like a lesbian couple to those people, but I didn’t care.
In LA, thankfully, we didn’t get stares like that. Angel was waiting for us outside in her black VW bug, leaning against the hood with Killer and Tokyo in each arm. They started squirming excitedly when the saw us, and yipping excitedly.
“Hi, babies!” I cooed, taking them from her after setting down my bags. They licked my face excitedly, climbing up my chest. They may be Ash’s dogs, and while it’s obvious that they adore him, they’d grown surprisingly attached to me over the last few months with the more time I spent at Ash’s house.
“Did Angel treat you two good?” They kept jumping.
“Hi Indy,” Angel said loudly, waving her arms after Maya hugged her and then went to put her luggage in the trunk.
Smiling at Angel, I set the dogs in the passenger seat through the open window and gave her a quick hug.
“Thanks for watching them for me. I hope they weren’t too much trouble.”
Angel snorted. “No not really. If anything, that boyfriend of yours spoils them! I gave them their food the first morning and they looked at me like they were expecting a fancy presentation! Those bowls are fancy enough, but Jesus!”
She kept rambling as I put my stuff in the back and opened the passenger door, moving the dogs onto my lap and buckling in as Angel started the car and moved out of LAX.
“Hold on, I need to call Ash.” I pulled my phone out of my pocket and hit speed dial, pressing the phone to my ear.
“Hey, Baby,” Ash sounded relieved, happy, and sad all at the same time. “How was the flight?”
I shrugged. “It was okay. Your pups were more than happy to see me.”
He laughed. “They know mommy when they see her.”
Ugh, again with mommies and babies… whatever, I won’t say anything.
“I guess so. We’re in Angel’s car on our way back to the apartment. I miss you,” I ran my fingers through Tokyo’s fur.
“I miss you too. Jake and CC and Andy already say that Jinxx and I look mopey as hell. Jake’s not much better, but he said Ella will be visiting this week, so that should make things slightly more interesting. OW! Jake, what the fuck?!”
“Don’t you dare, Ashley! You have Indy, I have Ella!”
I laughed into the phone.
“Babe, I’m gonna put you on speaker so you can talk to the dogs.” I pulled it away from my head and hit the speaker button, holding it between the dogs who sniffed with interest.
“Is that my pups I hear sniffing?” Ash’s voice had gone up a couple octaves as he cooed affectionately to the dogs via phone. They heard him and started to yip excitedly. Ash laughed softly.
“You two be good to Indy until I get back, okay?” They yipped in response, like they could understand him. Maya and Angel laughed with Ash and I as they rapidly moved around on my lap, not understanding that Ash’s voice was coming out of my phone.
“Indy, I gotta go, I have to get ready for our set, today. I’ll talk to you later, and let’s see if we can Skype, tonight. I love you so much.”
“I love you, too, Ashes.”
I could hear the band “Awww!” at the same time that Maya and Angel did. I heard Andy go “ow!” though so Ash must have hit him, or something.
I laughed gently and hung up the phone.
“You two are so adorable it’s sickening,” Angel said teasingly.
Smiling, I scratched behind Tokyo’s ear. “Yeah, I know.” Then I remember Ash’s comment from yesterday.
“Hey, can I ask you guys something?”
Slowly, they both nodded.
“Of course, Indy,” Maya said reassuringly.
“Umm… yesterday, um, Ash kinda maybe sort of asked me if I wanted kids.”
Angel and Maya both made a noise of acknowledgment. Was it not that big of a deal to them? Ashley Purdy, the band’s previous resident manwhore, asked me about kids. Did they not understand how weird that was?
“Doesn’t that seem the least bit strange to you guys?” I pressed, pulling the dogs a bit closer to my chest.
“Well, I guess so,” Angel said carefully. “I mean all couples at one point or another talk about having kids. Remember senior year when Mitch declared he never wanted to have kids when you guys met his little cousins? If anything, it’s just a bit weird for Ash because kids never seemed to be in the playing cards with the life he’d been leading.”
Maya, who was on her phone now, nodded in agreement. “Yeah, I wouldn’t worry so much, Indy. Ash is a good guy, and I know his relatives had lots of little kids that he’s been around, and I’ve seen him with very young fans, and he was always kind and patient and smiling at the strange things they’d say and making them laugh. He’d be a good parent.”
I looked at my lap. I could believe Ash could be a good parent, and he and I had similar living situations so it wasn’t like we couldn’t relate. The main difference was that his grandparents treated him well and encouraged him and were the parents he unfortunately lost. Mine were like that in the beginning, but when I turned nine, they turned a new leaf. Ash, unlike me, was too young to remember when they died. Me? I remember my parents clear as day. My mamaẽ was a beautiful woman who I apparently resemble, with caramel colored skin and long, thick, wavy black hair and chocolate colored eyes. She had the prettiest smile and sang to me every night before I went to bed, and made me cookies when I was good and made the best dinners. My papai was a big man who had brown hair and gray eyes and skin lighter than my mamaẽ’s. He had a deep, commanding voice and used to take me out with him when he went shopping and would buy me an ice cream. He took me to parks and played with me when my mamaẽ was working. They were my best friends. They were picking me up from kindergarten when they got hit by a sixteen-wheeler and died in the ambulance. Then a policewoman with sad eyes came to get me, and let me cry on her when she told me they died.

Flashback

I was sitting coloring in a flower at my desk, kicking my legs in the air. I was humming happily to myself and tugging on the hem of my shorts. My hair was long and dark, held back in a ponytail, and I was wearing a Monica shirt my mamaẽ bought me in Rio.
“Hey, Indigo! Wanna play dollies with me?” I turned to see another girl in my class, Lizzie, standing their looking at me expectedly. She was a little girl with pale skin, brown freckles on her nose, sun-colored hair in neat pigtails, a gap in her teeth, big green eyes, and a pink sundress. She looked at me expectantly.
Smiling big, I set down my red crayon. “Okay!” I followed her to the play matt and sat next to her next to a large white dollhouse with Barbie dolls set next to it. Lizzie grabbed the red-haired one in a checkered dress, and I got the one with brown hair in a red dress.
We weren’t playing for very long before I heard the door open. I looked and saw a police lady with blonde hair talking to my teacher, Ms. Ray. She looked so sad, and whatever she said to Ms. Ray made her gasp and put a hand on her mouth.
I shrugged and turned back to keep playing, setting my Barbie down in little bed.
“Indigo, sweetie?” Ms. Ray called. I looked back up to see she’d moved to stand right by me, the lady cop with her.
“Yes, Ms. Ray?” I asked.
“This is Officer Brown, she’d like to talk to you.”
I whined and looked at the dollhouse. “Can it wait?”
The police lady made a face. “I’m afraid not, dear. It’s very important I speak with you right away.”
Groaning, I stood and set the doll down.
“Where are you going?” Lizzie looked at me with big eyes, and that’s when I realized the whole class was looking at me funny.
“Indigo is going to go talk to the police officer about something important. Keep playing, everyone!” Ms. Ray said, clapping her hands together.
I followed the police officer outside the classroom into the hall, and she had me sit down in a little yellow chair, and she got on her knees in front of me.
“Indigo, I wish I never, ever had to tell you this, but it is so important I have to tell you.” Why did she look so sad?
“What is it?” I said, getting scared.
She got really close and put her hands on my shoulders. “Indigo, your mommy and daddy were in a car accident this morning. I’m sorry to tell you that they died, and you’re going to live with your relatives.”
What? No… No! It can’t be true! This lady had to be lying! They were going to pick me up today and take me to lunch at our favorite restaurant!
“No!” I said, starting to cry. “You’re lying! My mamaẽ and papai aren’t gone! They can’t be!” I made fists and tried to rub the tears from my eyes, but they were falling too fast.
I felt Officer Brown put her hands on my shoulders. “Indigo, I know it’s hard to believe, and I wish with all my heart that it wasn’t true, but it is. Your grandparents are flying up from Brazil to arrange the funeral and take you with them to Rio.”
That only made me cry harder, my chest and head starting to hurt more than they ever had before. Before I knew it, I’d thrown myself at the officer, who put her arms around me and rubbed my back in circles.
“I want my Mamaẽ!” I sobbed. “Papai!” I was starting to have trouble breathing I was crying so hard.
“I know, sweetheart. I know. I am so, so sorry, but remember your mommy and daddy loved you more than anything in the world. You were so precious so them, when they were in the ambulance, they kept trying to tell us to make sure you were safe. They loved you so much, never forget that.”
She let me cry until I fell asleep, and Ms. Ray took me to sleep in the nurse’s office until my mamaẽ’s friend from work came to pick me up. Her name was Mandy, and she smelt like lemon cleaner. I felt so drained that I slept the whole way back to our house, and stayed in the car while she packed up all my stuff and took all of the important stuff from my mamaẽ and papai and put it in her car.
I stayed at her house until Vovó and Vovô came to get me. I didn’t really know them, but they were shorter people dark skin and dark eyes. They were my mamaẽ’s parents. Vovó’s hair was long and gray, and she was wearing a black dress. Vovô had short white hair and was wearing a black suit. Both looked at me sadly as I came downstairs, holding the teddy bear papai gave me when I turned five.
“Indigo?” Vovô’s voice sounded rough and angry. “Did your mother and father teach you Portuguese?” He spoke to me in Portuguese.
I nodded, unable to talk without crying.
Vovó walked to me and held her arms out to pick me up. I held my arms up and she stuck her hands under my arms and picked me up, putting me on her hip.
“How has she been?” She asked Mandy. Her accent sounded like my parents’.
Mandy looked sad. “She won’t say a word, I don’t think she can. Every time she tries she just breaks down, again. She had nightmares last night and hasn’t eaten since lunch yesterday. I tried to make her eat but she just pushed her plate away and started crying again.”
I pushed my head into Vovó’s shoulder, holding my teddy tighter.
“No food?” Vovô sounded angry. “Lu, give her to me.”
Suddenly, I was held by Vovô, who wiped my tears I hadn’t realized were falling.
“Linda,” he said. “We miss your mommy and daddy, too, but you have to eat. Not eating won’t do any good, and they want you to have a good appetite and grow big and strong. When we go, will you eat something for us?” He stroked my hair, which wasn’t in a ponytail today.
I nodded. “I want my mommy and daddy,” I whispered in Portuguese to him.
He looked sad. “I know, baby. But they aren’t coming back. But you have us, and you have all your cousins and aunts and uncles who can’t wait to see you.”
With that, they got my stuff and took me to their hotel, where I ate a cheese sandwich under their watchful eyes and got ready for the funeral the next day, which I cried through and then ran out of when they put the caskets in the ground.

“INDY!” A voice suddenly shouted next to me. I jumped almost out of my seat and looked up, realizing I’d been daydreaming and was sitting awkwardly in Angel’s car.
“Huh?”
Angel was standing next to me, looking concerned.
“You okay, Indy?”
Faking a smile, I pulled my backpack over one shoulder and picked up the dogs, taking them out of the car.
“Yeah, just thinking.”
“You looked like you were crying, though.”
I laughed lightly. “Naw, I’m okay. Just thinking, I promise. Help me get my stuff, will you?”
Juggling the dogs, I took out my apartment key and opened the door and set the stop. I quickly carried them upstairs and set the living room of my apartment and my backpack on the couch. Shutting the door so they wouldn’t leave, I ran back down and took my suitcases from Angel so she could get the dogs’ stuff, and took them back up, catching up with Maya and going into the apartment. Angel came up quickly after us holding their bed and bowls and food. Their leashes were in the bed and so were the bowls.
“Thanks a million for helping us out, Angel. You better get to work before Agnes has a cow.”
Angel laughed. “Maya’s supposed to come with me, so really I’m leaving whenever she’s ready.”
Maya grabbed her bag and phone. “Ready!” She announced, and then followed Angel back out.
“See you later, Indy!” They called.
“Ciao!” I called.
When the door shut, the dogs jumped up on the couch and settled next to each other, clearly ready for a nap.
Thinking about my parents made me think about the stuff Mandy had taken from the house, and the teddy bear I had the day my grandparents came and got me.
Walking into my bedroom, I got down on my hands and knees and went under the bed and pulled out a black, weathered briefcase that’d belonged to my Mamaẽ. Opening it, I saw a bunch of documents dealing with their property and what would happen to me if something had happened to them. They’d left me money and the property was supposed to go to me when I turned eighteen, so I lived in it when I emancipated myself at sixteen, selling it when I moved into the apartment I was living in now and used the money to pay for school and the apartment.
Setting the briefcase aside, I shuffled over to my closet and pulled out an old trunk that had all my stuff in it from when I was a kid. Resting on top was the teddy bear I had. It was worn, now, and the ribbon around its neck was faded. Underneath was a box with all of my mother’s jewelry and my parents’ wedding rings. There were photo albums and home movies, and my Papai’s old jacket and dress shoes, and my Mamaẽ’s wedding dress and her favorite scarves and shoes. There were their old records and perfumes and colognes. Even Mamaẽ’s hairbrush was here.
I picked up my teddy and sniffed it. It still smelled like Papai– cologne, salt, and motor oil. I cuddled it to my chest and sat on the floor with it for a good while.
Maybe being a mom wouldn’t be so difficult, after all.

Notes

Hey!
So I had to create a Mibba account to get into this because Google is being an assbutt XP thankfully it let me into this account and that was my main worry XP
is anyone else experiencing problems with the Google login?
Mamae and papai are just mom and dad
and Vovó and Vovô are very similar in spelling but the difference is that the first one is grandma and the second on is grandpa

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