My Darkest Desire (Ashley Purdy/OC/Andy Biersack)

Ashley's Pov:

"Do I sound weird if I admit that I missed you?" Kaylie laughed as she hugged me.

"Oh please! Who wouldn't miss me?" I answered hugging her back.

"Awww, you and your giant ego!" She said and smacked my arm.

"Ouch! Dammit, woman! What are you? A sumo wrestler in a tiny body?!" I said rubbing my arm.

"Maybe..." She chuckled as we headed to the car.

My eyes widened when I saw the Corvette and wondered how the fuck did Kaylie get it.

"Okay, she's drunk or she's asleep?" I asked pointing towards the car.

"Actually, she's bored of it! It's mine now!" Kaylie said happily as she helped me set my luggage in the trunk.

"She gave it to you?!" I said shocked.

"Yep."

"She was drunk. Don't get to excited!" I said as I got in the car.

"She wasn't! And oh my gosh, look at my car!" She screamed starting the engine.

i smiled at her as we left the airport's parking lot. It was good to be back. The last two weeks were the worst period of my life. Being away from Nikki was pure torture. I somehow managed to finish the dress collection a week ago.

After that, I wanted to be alone for awhile. I ignored Nikki's calls and texts and I just tried to forget her. But it was useless. When I walked through my house, I remembered her being there. Everywhere. Even when I looked at Tokyo and Killer, I remembered how happy they were whenever Nikki was around.

I love her! I love her with everything I have! I'm helpless because she owns my heart, my soul and my body. Being away from her made me realize that she was right. We'd rather fight all day than being away from each other. I missed her like crazy. I just couldn't wait to get to her house, to see the surprise on her face when she sees me. To wrap my arms around her and kiss her like there was no tomorrow. To just pick her up and lock ourselves somewhere far from everyone and everything. Just me and her... Just like we used to...

I was grinning like a teenager when Kaylie's phone started to ring. She smiled widely when she checked the caller id and I chuckled.

"Awww, he's already missing you?" I mocked her.

"Shut up, Ashley! Hey, Andy. I just picked him up, we're on our way back." She said cheerfully and glared at me.

Something changed in her expression, making her eyes fill with worry.

"The hospital? Why? Just... Yeah... Calm down for a second and tell me what happened."

My eyes snapped to her and a cold shiver ran through my whole body. Something wasn't right. I saw how Kaylie's knuckles turned white as she gripped the wheel hard. She clenched her teeth and her eyes filled with tears. My hands started to tremble and I already knew it was about Nikki.

"We'll be there in 10 minutes. Just try to calm down. What floor?...okay, bye!"

She hung up and threw her phone on the backseat. She sighed and bit her lip desperately. I had to find my voice to ask what happened, and when I did it sounded hoarse.

"What's going on?"

"Nikki tried to commit suicide."

My world crashed. In that moment, I lost everything. My heart broke into a million pieces and I felt miserable. She did it again. She promised! She fucking promised me that she won't do it! And she did it again because I fucking ignored her! She must've thought that I left her. That I broke my part of the promise! I was so idiot! This was all my fault. I couldn't even surprise her without messing something up.

"H-How?" I asked, my eyes filling with tears.

"Andy said that he found her in the bathroom with her arms slaughtered." Kaylie said as tears started to roll on her cheeks.

Her arms... Both of her arms. I was so angry in that moment that I could've killed someone with just one look. Why did this had to happen?! When I was finally sure about my feelings?! About what I wanted to do?! Why couldn't we just be together without someone always screwing up?! Why the fuck was always something in the way?!

My tears started to fall as Kaylie pulled in front of the hospital. I jumped out of the car and I ran towards the entrance.

"Floor 5!" Kaylie yelled as I reached the elevator.

She told the receptionist who we wanted to see and didn't wait for a reply. She ran inside the elevator as we were both tapping our foots and biting our lips. When we finally reached the floor, the first thing I saw was Andy covered in blood, crying with his head in his hands.

"Where is she?" I said panicked as Kaylie knelt down in front of him.

"They're giving her blood. They said she shouldn't even be alive at how much blood she lost." He answered looking at me.

I freaked out and I started to walk back and forth through the hall. She shouldn't even be alive?! That means she wasn't dead... Yet! Why now?! Why did she do it when everything was about to go back on track?! Why was she so dumb?! She made me promise her that I won't leave her when she just tried to take her life and leave me alone forever!! What was I supposed to do without her?! How was I supposed to live without her?!!

A door opened and a doctor came out with a frown on his face.

"You're here for miss Morgan?" He asked and we nodded."Which one of you has O negative?"

"I do!" Kaylie and I said at the same time.

"Medical analysis?"

"Done!"

"Any diseases?"

"No!"

"Get inside." He answered as he led us to another salon. I looked at Andy one last time and he just nodded as we entered the room.

The doctor motioned for us to roll our sleeves up and sit down. We did as we were told and he stabbed my arm, the blood starting to flow in a tube.

"How is she?" I asked as I was staring at the tube.

"Her body rejected all the blood we gave her. This blood type is also rare and we were running out anyway. This might be her only chance." He said as he filled the tube.

"What do you mean?" Kaylie asked as he gave me a tissue and walked towards her.

"She had around 2 l of blood remaining in her body. Most of the people die before they're left with 3. She had a mix of alcohol and pills in her body that caused more damage and fact that she is underweight made her condition even worse. She is alive right now only because of the machines." He continued as he stabbed Kaylie's arm.

My head was spinning badly and I tried to stay focused on his words.

"What if she rejects this blood too?" I asked holding my head.

"We can keep her in a coma and administrate her liquids until her body is back to normal. But that's risky because most of her organs collapsed. She could die any minute. We already lost her 3 times because her heart stopped. She is stable right now but her only chance is this blood. It will help her heart to work properly." He said as he stood up.

I helped Kaylie wipe off the remaining blood on her arm and I supported her weight. I was thinking about what the doctor said and I felt on the edge. Nikki already died 3 times. But they managed to bring her back. I prayed that her body won't reject the blood and that at least it will be able to recover. I couldn't think straight in that moment, but I was sure that if Nikki died I would've followed her. I couldn't live without her.

"We will do our best. However, I have a good feeling. No one comes back to life 3 times only to die the fourth. Wait and pray for now, it's the only thing you can do." The doctor said reassuringly.

We just nodded and we sat on the chairs. Andy looked destroyed and he didn't even seem to notice Kaylie's presence near him. I closed my eyes and I prayed. I prayed to God not to take away from me the woman I love. I prayed with all my heart as I kept crying. I couldn't even speak or think. I was emotionally drained and I felt desperate. I hoped that she will wake up, that she will forgive me and take me back. That she will smack me and yell at me. I wanted her to do anything but die...

A few hours later, when the doctor came out, I was almost nuts. I kept walking back and forth. Andy didn't move from his position, with his head in his hands. Kaylie was in the smoking area, smoking and smoking and letting everyone know what happened.

"Her body responded to the blood. But because of the delay she's still in coma. The blood loss damaged her internal organs badly. I'm not sure when she will wake up or if she ever will. For now that's all we could do. You can visit her but one person at the time." He said and he looked at me.

I stepped forward and I looked at her from the doorway. My heart exploded in that moment and I started to cry desperately. She looked like she was already dead. Her black hair was sprawled all over the pillow. Her face was white as fuck and her lips were purple. All sorts of wires were coming in and out of her body and her arms were covered in bandages.

I got inside and I sat on a chair on her right side. I took her hand in mine and I collapsed my face on her hip, crying desperately.

"Please, Tiger, don't leave me now. Not when we're so close." I whispered as I looked at her expressionless face.

"Wake up, Nikki. Don't leave me, I can't live without you. I love you too much. Don't die on me now!" I said as more tears spilled from my eyes.

She was cold as a stone. The only noises in the room were her heart monitor and my sobs. I felt dead inside as I was clutching tight the hand of the woman I fell in love with...

"Please, wake up...."

Notes

Awe I manged to post another one before I leave to my grandma!

Let me know what you think !! Love yaaaa!!!