The Fire in Your Hands

This is unreal. Two human beings have been living inside of me for close to a year. I mean for gods sake I have a flat stomach, how was I supposed to know? Years ago a knife incident, the same one that took my eye, got me in the stomach and I was told I will always be infertile. I hardly ever got periods, maybe once a year. Those pregnancy tests said negative. Six of them!
Andy and I didn't get time to prepare for this or anything... I mean Christ, this is our fucking wedding day. And I just gave birth.
A different doctor walked through the door. at least I think it was. I was woozy, a bit groggy still. I had been asleep for close to five hours. "Biersack?"
We both turned our heads to her. She smiled to us. "Congratulations you guys! Have you decided on names?" I nodded my head and decided to stop that immediately. I felt like the world was moving up and down with me. She nodded with me "Great... Great" she looked down at her clipboard. "Well, I see that these two were quite a surprise for you! We have lots of good news, some bad." My head was spinning. I looked at Andy sitting in the chair beside me. He looked like he had calmed down. Then I looked down and saw the little thing he was holding. A baby in a blue blanket. They were both quiet. The doctors voice started again. "The reason you didn't grow any during your pregnancy was because they were both so small. The boy is 3 pounds, the little girl is 2 pounds. Surprisingly, they're both healthy. In fact, they and you both should be able to go home in a couple of hours, as long as you keep a close watch on them for the next few days.
The only bad news we have for them is that obviously they are so small and underweight. But, it happens. Very rare but it does happen. Miss Biersack, would you like to meet your daughter?" I closed my eyes and nodded, laying my head back. I found it hard to keep my head up, I felt heavy. I wish mom was here. A nurse came in a few minutes later with a small ball of candy pink. She smiled, leaning over and handing me the baby. I reached up and took her, slowly bringing her to a cradle position in my arms. I took a moment to stare at her. She looked back up at me with bright blue eyes. She had a mess of black hair. I stared at her for a few more minutes, not knowing what to do with her when she made a loud, abrupt sound. I smiled at that. She smiled back at me and made the noise again. I stroked her hair and held her close. I wish I could have gotten to know her when she was still in me. I looked over at my son and he had the same mess of black hair, but bright gray eyes. I looked back down at Carbon and she had closed her eyes, like she was sleeping. I leaned my head down and kissed her softly on the forehead. It finally registered to me that I was a mother.

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