The Morticians Daughter

i sat in the front of the church, numb to everything. i was so shocked, yet tears threatened to trickle down my cheeks any moment. i didn't care that i was crying, and i didn't care if anybody saw me crying. all i want in this world is for my mother back.

i let them fall as i brought my attention back to a man in a suit that i didn't recognize.

"Amy was a wonderful woman.. we where childhood friends. we grew up together down the street, and we would have play dates almost everyday. i remember one time we climbed on top of the garage and we hid up there for almost 6 hours from her cousins playing hide and seek with us.."

i couldn't pay attention. not now, when there a man in front of me, but my mother coffin right behind him. i asked my father if the coffin could be closed or i would have completely lost it. i thought about all of our fun family times we had as i stared at a picture of me and her at my hockey game when i was 13. she was my best friend growing up. after kids would pick on me and put me down my mother was always there to help me get back up, and give me a little push. more tears watered my eyes as i thought about my mothers beautiful smile.. she was the prettiest person in the entire world.

i got snapped back into reality when i realized that the man who was talking before was motioning at me to come up. i cant go up there..i am speechless. i got up and wiped down my suit, as i slowly walked up to the podium. not sure what to say exactly. once i climbed the few stairs up to my mothers coffin, i pulled my hand out to touch one of the white roses. my mother loved white roses.

i took a shaky breathe as tears escaped my eyes again, and i faced the church as i stepped up.

"my.. mom.." was all i could get out.

"i..i..she.." i couldn't speak. not now. i rested my head in my arm as i took a heavy breathe as more tears began to spill. then i felt someone tap my shoulder. i looked up and noticed it was my dad with the same expression as me. sad and lost. "its okay son, take a seat." i nodded as i climbed back down the stairs and took my seat, my eyes only focusing on the coffin, and wet tears spilled my face. i cant do this.


i have never imagined a world without my mother, and i cant imagine it still.

Notes