Our pain will shine our light to, those who understand

"So i was born on the 21 st of September making me thirteen next month but that's not important. Anyway, my mum is called Andrea and my biological father is named Sam i believe. I grew up to the age of six in a small cottage having an easy life, i mean my parents never fought and they loved me dearly. When i was 6 years old my father Sam left in the middle of the night leaving behind everything. I remember the day clearly: i woke up, then as usual ran through to my parents bedroom to wake them although that day it was not the case. Opening the door i found my mum bawling on the bed holding a note to her chest. Not realising what was going on i began to question her about where dad was but i was ignored. His car was still parked in the drive the only things he had taken was money and a duffel bag filled with clothes and shoes. I don't know what he had written on that note as Mum never let me see it. She began to drink and by drink i mean she constantly had some kind of alcohol whether in her mouth or no more that a metre from her reach. Like you i had to bring myself up although i was older i know exactly how you feel, i mean you having to look after your sister at four years old seems unrealistic i mean if i hadn't met you i would think it was a lie. Anyway, my mum then came home late as usual from the bar although this time was different. She had brought home a guy who was named Robert. At first it was great i mean she sobered up and he cared for me like his own, treating me like a princess however this didn't last for long. They fled to Vegas for a weekend leaving me at my grandma's who i deeply cherished however is no longer alive, they came back on the Monday married. That's when my life turned into hell, Robert began to abuse me and i mean physically, sexually and verbally like what Luke did to you. Unlike you i wasn't able to escape after a year i had to endure the pain as my mum watched from the sofa for 6 more years. I realise how that kinda stuff matures you, makes you understand how to survive by yourself,independently. My old school was hell i was bullied everyday and beat up for listening to 'weird' music and being different. That when i began to self harm, before you worry i stopped before you met me because of music. The day you found me was the day of my escape, the day i finally was able to leave. I had managed to save up enough money to buy a bus ticket to warped, having some money to buy merch and leaving at 6 am that morning before anyone was awake i left only bearing my clothes and my necklace which was my grandma's. Once the day was over i knew i had to go home but i didn't want to, i had no where else to go, i had no clue what to do, that's when you found me and the rest is history. We are so similar Cassara, the way we jump at physical contact and act like we are confident when inside we are crumbling, the guys really have helped haven't they? we both used to not trust men after the pain we endured. Even if we do not admit it to ourselves we both where hesitant to trust and feel comfortable about BVB despite them doing nothing to harm us. I trusted you as soon as i saw you, i knew you understood me and i too understand you we are like to peas in a pod."

Wiping my tears from my cheeks my eyes flickered at Nicky, her eyes where swimming in a pool of tears although not one was shed. I couldn't believe that she had had to deal with the pain i felt but for six whole years with no escape and it broke my heart. It made sense how similar we are, how we both act around bullies and our traits. How we both built walls around ourselves so we couldn't be hurt when in reality we where like an fried egg. The way the yolk can hold its insides as if it strong but as soon it is punctaured the reality seeps through. I mean comparing us to an egg isn't the best metaphor but it makes sense. Turning my body to Veronicka i cradled her small frame in a bone crushed hug as we wept into each other shoulders letting out everything we had bottled up for years now knowing each other inside out.

Notes

WOW two updates in one day, i am proud. Anyway this is Veronicka's life and you will be seeing a lot more of her now.

As usual comment how you like this story below even if if it is only one worded and as i always say ore comments means quicker updates.

- Em xx