I leaned against the tour bus, my back touching the warm metal. I wanted to leave, I wanted to get away from Andy, but I wanted to hear what the band was talking about. I walked the perimeter of the bus and found a conveniently open window next to the lounge.

“Andy, all I’m saying is, sometimes you have weird panic attacks and lash out. You usually don’t remember anything the next day, so we’ve never really told you,” A voice, most likely Jinxx, carried through the window and out into the summer air.

“Why didn’t you tell me?! My girlfriend is pissed at me now because I acted like a dick without even knowing it!”

Wait…he didn’t know? No, that’s bullshit, of course he knew, otherwise, he wouldn’t have said those things to me.

“I have to find her. I have to tell her that I’m sorry, and that I care about her,” I heard Andy say.

Oh shit, he’s going to come looking for me. I heard the bus door open and slam shut, and, not thinking, I started to quietly walk away. I peeked my head around the bus and saw Andy standing there, his back to me. Without warning, he whipped his head around faster than I could duck behind the bus.

“Shitshitshitshitshit fuck cunt dammit fuck shitshitshit,” I said under my breath.

“Des? Is that you?”

“Dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit,” I said, quietly.

An inked arm came snaking around the shell of the bus and I avoided his touch with caution. That is, until I stepped on a rock, lost my balance, and fell backwards on my ass.

“FUCK." Andy came running to me like a mother whose child was terribly hurt. He extended an arm to me and I shoved it out of the way.

“I can get up by myself, Biersack, I’m a big girl.” I continued to lay on the ground in the awkward position I fell into.

“Des, I’m sorry about last night. I barely remember anything that happened. If you hate me, I don’t blame you. I’ve got too many problems for you to handle, and I understand if you don’t want to be my girlfriend anymore.” He crouched down next to me and whispered, “I care about you more than anything in the world. You know that, right?”

“How many other girls have you said that to? Look, Andy, we’re young. I’m only 18 years old. I’m on tour with my favorite band, and my least favorite person. Which is you, if you hadn’t noticed. I need some time to take this in. I can’t stay tied to one person like this.” I sat up and I was now eye level with him. I looked him in the eye, and forced myself not to break contact.

He rocked forward on his feet and tried to connect our lips.

“Don’t you dare kiss me.” I narrowed my eyes and glared at him with a burning anger.

He leaned back and nodded his head. “Fine.”

He stood, and walked back onto the bus.

“Well, she hates me. Thank you guys,” I heard him say through the window.

---

“We are Black Veil Brides! Thank you for coming out today!”

Another day, another dollar. I had gotten plenty of compliments on my new ink, and I had gotten far less hate from girls as I did my first day. Working for your favorite band is tough, especially in the merchandise tent, because you want practically everything in the tent. A sea of t-shirts and bracelets were loaded onto the bus, along with a swarm of posters in need of signing, and other merchandise was waiting to be loaded. I longingly looked on as the crew lifted box after box of merchandise and Acid had to drag me away and onto the bus.

"You think too much. Relax babe, we can have all the merch we want." she said.

Amanda greeted us at the door and proceeded to tell us all about her amazing day on tour. She explained that Ash and CC were doing shots, so we should probably stay clear of the alcoholics. Acid, of course, wiggled her eyebrows and went to look for her boy toy.

“Good news everybody.” The manager came onto the bus and raised his voice above Ashley and CC’s. “There’s two final days of Warped Tour left, and after that, you’ll have about three months off. Let’s get through these last two days, you guys.” He thanked the bus driver and stepped off. I took this opportunity to freak the fuck out. I’m pissed at Andy, but I have no place to stay. Maybe I could stay with Ashley?

“So, Blade, where you going after this?” Ashley asked me.

Speak of the Devil. “Actually I’m not sure, I don’t really have a place to stay.”

I sat on the couch in the lounge and took an Xbox controller. Mortal Combat vs. DC Universe started up and I proceeded to choose Batman, again, and kick Tanya’s ass.

Andy sat next to me, which I didn’t have a problem with, until he started to move his hand onto my lower thigh.

“You can come stay with me, i-if you wanna,” he said, quietly. He lightly traced my tattoo with his index finger and watched intently as I fought the different characters.

“And why would I wanna do that?” I asked, crossing my legs. I let his hand slip a little further down my leg and he sharply breathed in. After he saw that I hadn’t reacted to his touch, he slowly released his breath.

“I thought that you might want a place to stay after the tour. I have a pretty nice apartment in LA and I’m pretty sure you don’t want to stay with the horn monster that is Ashley Purdy.”

I laughed when he said “horn monster”, because it was true, Ashley Purdy was a horny little freak.

“It’s so nice to hear you laugh. Your cheeks do this cute thing where they start to turn red, and your smile is just perfect.”

“Thanks Andy, but buttering me up isn’t going to fix the problem.”

“Hey, you guys, I suggest going to bed sometime soon, I don’t want to be tired for tomorrow’s show,” Jinxx said. “Today sucked, and I can’t have that happen tomorrow.” He stood from his seat on the floor and said goodnight. CC got up as well, hugging Amanda and pulling her to her bunk.

“Goodnight, you guys,” I said, putting the controller back on the table. Andy stood up as well and I could feel him towering behind me. I turned around and locked eyes with the vocalist, crossing my arms.

“Can I help you?”

“I just wanted to know if you wanted to sleep with me tonight. It gets kind of lonely up there in that big bunk with no one to share it with.” He slowly grasped my arm, and cautiously pulled me into a hug. I hugged him back, and when he saw that I wasn’t murdering him, he hugged me tighter, resting his chin on my head. He sighed happily and stroked my blonde hair.

And, I realized, just then, that I missed him. It had been no less than a day without him and I missed him so badly that it almost hurt. His voice, his touch, his eyes, his stupid little smirk, his scent. The mixture of smoke, sweat, and cologne filled my nose and I couldn’t have been happier.

Wait. Of course I could be happier. I’m mad at him. He… he said all those mean, horrible things to me.

But standing there in the lounge, hugging my savior, I knew I couldn’t be mad forever. I would eventually have to forgive him.

Things would be different in LA. Andy wouldn’t be so stressed because we won’t be on tour. But what if it isn’t any different? What if he still treats me the same? Just the merch girl…insignificant…

“Let me put my pajamas on and I’ll meet you at your bunk,” I said, my voice muffled by his warm embrace. He let go and kissed my forehead, smiling at me and he slid onto his mattress. I went to my bunk, pulling out my suitcase and grabbing some shorts and a tank top I had stolen from the tent (don’t worry, I paid for it).

I changed and headed back to Andy’s tall bunk, knocking on the wood underneath the bed. He opened his curtain and pulled me up.

I smiled and laid down next to him. He did the same, wrapping an arm around my torso. He pulled me closer, snuggling his head into my back.

“This tattoo makes me want to cry every time I look at it,” he said.

“Why is that?” I asked, barely moving.

“It’s just, it’s so important to me. I was there when you got this tattoo. That’s my band. The one I started when I was barely fifteen. You went through so much pain, and you’re still going strong. You got my band logo permanently inked onto your back. You just… continue to amaze me, with everything you do.”

“I’m not that great, Biersack. I mean, why would you want a girl that intentionally hurts herself? A girl who is constantly being made fun of. A girl who can’t keep her cool because a guy said some things to her…”

He flipped me over, almost angrily, and was instantly on top of me, his hands on either side of my head to support his weight. My eyes were wild, and his face was inches away from mine.

“If I ever hear you talk like that about yourself again, I will personally see to it, myself, that you get a thousand mirrors installed in your house so that you can see how beautiful you are. Inside and out, you’re a wonderful person. Okay? Don’t ever put yourself down.”

I blinked, not knowing what to say, I was too astounded for words. He flipped me back on my side and repositioned himself to where he was before. He nuzzled his head into my back again, only this time, he kissed the BVB logo. I shuddered a little, not used to the intimacy from someone. Andy’s long hair brushed up against my bare back and every time he breathed, it would flutter against my skin.

I sighed contently as Andy tightened his grip on my body. I silently wished my parents could see how I’m doing without them. How they kicked me out, and here I am, making more money than both of them combined. I quietly vowed to myself that I would never go back.

As I finally drifted off to sleep, I heard Andy say, under his breath, “You’re my fallen angel, Ms. Destiny Patterson.”

Notes

You. Guys. I'm in tears, graduation is upon us at my school and I've befriended so many Seniors, it's not healthy. It honestly hurts me to see them all grow up. BUT, how did you guys like this chapter? Let me know ;D

Oh, btw, grades are:
89
97
96
86
HOLLA AT ME BROTHAAAA