Cinco:

I looked up and smiled as Black Veil Brides walked into my hospital room. Tom was curled up beside and Josh and JP were laid across the end of my bed. “Hey everybody!” I waved.

“Are you okay?” Ashley was the first to ask. I could see Andy smirking and playfully rolling his eyes, and felt Tom tense up beside me.

“I’m fine, it turns out my dad re-broke a few ribs, no big deal,” I shrugged as I chuckled.

“Re-broke,” Andy asked.

“Yeah, trust me it’s not that bad, I’ve been in here loads of times,” I laughed as I gestured to the hospital room.

“Alexis stop it,” Ashley breathed.

“Stop what,” I chuckled.

“Stop trying to make light of the situation. You got your ass handed to you not even a full twelve hours ago, your ribs are broken, and apparently, this isn’t the first time it’s happened!” Ashley snapped.

“What can I say? I’m sorry, but I’m used to this,” I shrugged.

“Bu you shouldn’t have to be used to it,” CC spoke up. His voice was quiet and he was not being his normal, hyper self.

“Guys, really, I try not to make a big deal out of it, because it isn’t-

“Yes it is!” Ashley yelled. He turned his back on me, about to exit the room.

“Stay the fuck where you are!” I roared. “This is my life and I’m not going to piss and moan about it. I’m sorry that you can’t handle the fact that I’ve accepted my life has turned to shit, but I refuse to mope around and sob in front of everyone all the fucking time. My ribs are broke, so the fuck what. It’s happened before, and it probably won’t be the last time either.” Ashley turned to face me and I noticed that he, like the others, had watery eyes. “Shit happens, Ash. Sometimes life deals us shitty cards, you just have to play with the cards you’ve been dealt and hope the person next to you has shittier cards.”

I sighed as I closed my eyes. I worked myself up and now my ribs were hurting me again. I was soon released and given painkillers before being carried back onto the bus. I laid there in my bunk, facing the wall, and staring at the pictures of some of the few happy moments in my life.

There was a picture of Tom, Josh, JP, and I as children. We’re all in the bathtub, butt naked, and have these huge ass smiles on out faces. The next photo is a birthday party, my fourteenth I think. I’m sitting on Tom’s lap with this huge, goofy grin on my face. JP is kissing my forehead, Josh is kissing my left cheek, and Tom has his lips pressed to the corner of my mouth on the right side. The next couple of photos are just screwing around with our instruments or us at the park. My happy memories always involved my boys.

I felt cold air as my curtain was pulled back and someone wrapped their arms, gently, around my waist. “I’m sorry Lex.”

I look over my shoulder to stare into Ashley’s brown eyes and smile, “You’re forgiven. I can’t stay mad at you guys for long.” I chuckle.

“Does it hurt?” He asked.

I nod my head. “Like a bitch.”

Ashley sit ups and shuts the curtain before turning on my small lamp. He carefully moves me so that I am lying on my back and with a look in the direction of my face, lifts my shirt to where he can see my bruises. He grimaces at the sight and bites his lip.

“I know, it’s awful,” I mumble as I try to push my shirt back down. Ashley’s hands stop me. He places my hands back at my sides then gently presses a calloused hand onto my bruised skin. My skin was very tender, and even his light touch caused pain to shoot through me. I bit my bottom lip and instead, focused on his face. This helped lessen the pain, but not by much.

I lay there, quietly, as he gently brushed his hand across my exposed skin, observing every bruise, scar, and cut. It amazed me when I saw the care in his eyes. This guy truly cares about me. As if sensing my thoughts, Ashley brings his eyes up to mine and slowly lowers himself to my side before wrapping an arm around me. I curl up to his side, still facing him, and smile as he reaches out and tucks a piece of hair behind my ear.

“I hate what he’s done to you,” he whispered.

“I do too,” I reply back just as softly. It doesn’t take long for the medicine to kick in. I fall asleep to the sound of Ashley humming to me; his fingers still trailing small circles across my skin.

~****~

I awoke hours later to someone shaking me. I opened my eyes to see Tom looking at me. I discreetly looked around my bunk as I stretched; Ashley was gone. I hissed when I pulled skin. “Damnit,” I hissed. Turning back to Tom, I sighed and patted the space beside me. “Okay, Tomi, talk.”

“I saw you guys, when were you going to tell me you had feelings for him?”

“I don’t know.”

“Are you guys dating?”

“Don’t be stupid, Tom-

“I’m not the one being stupid, Lex. He’s a player, you know how I know? Because I do the same shit he does. I’ve grown up with you and I’ve seen you hurt, I don’t want to watch him hurt you too.” Tom sighed as he turned away from me.

I ran my hands through my hair. “Tom, I don’t even know what’s going on between us. We’ve kissed, okay, that’s it. I don’t know what’s going to happen, but if this is a mistake, then it’s one that I have to make on my own.” I wrapped my arms around his shoulders. “I love you dude.”

“I love you too babe.” Tom kissed my cheek then hopped out of my bunk before helping me down as well.

We entered the kitchen I grabbed an apple and sat down next to Ashley. “So what’s up for today,” I asked JP.

JP looked at his PDA. “We have an interview, awesome!” He smirked.

BVB started laughing and at our questioning gazes Andy answered, “You won’t think it’s so awesome after like the fourth interview. It’s the same questions all the time.”

“Whatever man, this is so cool,” Josh smiled.

I just shook my head and laughed.

“Are you going to be okay, Lex?” Tom asked.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” I shrugged. I took out my iPod and decided to stop conversation (conversation that dealed with me anyway) and drowned out the world. Soon we arrived at the venue and my boys and I were ushered into a back room to change for our interview. I put on a pair of black skinny jeans and a Motley Crue t-shirt. I tied my hair up and did basic makeup before picking up my phone and putting it in my back pocket.

“You ready?” Tom asked me.

I nodded my head yes and breathed out.

~****~

I fumbled with my fingers in my lap as I sat on the interviewer’s couch with my band mates. So far we’ve been asked if we were single, how we knew each other, how long we’ve been a band, and why we picked the name Vanilla Lace seeing as we are far from innocent and pure. She hadn’t asked it yet, but I knew she was going to. The bitch had this sick, sadistic smirk on her face and she kept glancing at me every time we got through a question. It was coming up.

“Alexis, your band’s cover “Hell is for Children” it’s a song about abuse. Numerous photos have cropped up of you covered in bruises, would you care to explain?” She smiled.

I wanted to rip the bitch’s throat out. I sighed and took in a deep breath, which I regretted the second I felt that sharp sting. “I am a victim of child abuse,” I shrugged.

“Rumors have it that it’s your dad who has put those bruises and cuts on you, is that true?”

I could only nod my head; I could feel my throat closing up as she stared me down.

“If your father was watching this right now, what would you say to him?”

I closed my eyes and gripped the leather seat. “I guess I would ask the obvious question: why? I guess I just feel like maybe I wasn’t good enough. He said I was always in the way. I suppose I’d say I’m sorry for being the mistake he couldn’t get rid of.” Tears were streaming down my face. Without another word, I leapt off the couch and ran backstage. I yanked off the mic as I ran and threw it down to the floor. The bus was right outside the backdoor. I ran past the screaming fans and onto the bus. But I wasn’t alone. I mentally cursed at myself as I looked into five worried faces.

“Lex,” Ashley started.

I shoved past him and ran towards my bunk. I pulled the curtain and curled up into a ball before sobbing into my pillow. Why the fuck am I such a weakling… Why the hell do I let him get to me like this…What did I do to make my father want to hurt me? I eventually cried myself to sleep.