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I Never Meant Forever

All My Heart

Ashley POV

After I shut the door I fell back against it, my heart beating too fast to even hear a single beat. This couldn't be happening, Andy wasn't next door, not the Andy I love..loved, no, it can't be! I looked around the room to see that Kina had fallen asleep already in bed. She looked so peacful, she has always done right by me, she made me so happy. But now that I've seen Andy I can't help but feel those feelings again for him, even though I love Kina. I know that in my heart I could never love her like I love him. It's not fair on her, and I need to fix it before I hurt her.

The chances of her waking up were slim, I knew how tired she was after finally arriving here, but just in case I still left her a note. I said that I had decided to go for a quick swim, and added 'I love you xx' at the bottom, though I felt bad for doing so. Grabbing a towel and changing into my board shorts I quietly left the room and shut the door behind me. I chucked my towel under a near by tree and noticed another person's towel already there. I couldn't see anyone on the beach so I just assumed someone had left their behind sometime during the day.

I made my way out into the water. I wasn't out too far when I saw a figure laying in the water, I got a bit closer before I froze. It was Andy, I couldn't just turn around and swim away, cause I knew he had heard me swim towards him. Maybe I should talk to him? I thought to myself, no I couldn't what could I say without him hating me? But I need to tell him how sorry I am..."urghh..umm..what am I even doing?" I muttered to myself, looking down into the clear dark blue water. "Hey, can I help you?" I heard him ask as he sat up in the water, I felt my whole body stiffen before I finally managed to say, "Andy, can you ever forgive me?"

I couldn't see his features too well, only the outline of his figure but I could tell he knew it was me. I was scared, he hadn't said anything, only stood there looking away from me, I knew I had really stuffed it up, he probably hated me more than ever now. I was so stupid to think he would just forgive me like that, your an idiot Ash, you really are I thought to myself. I closed my eyes trying not to let the tears escape, after a few moments I could feel someone right infront of me but I couldn't open my eyes to check. Next thing I knew I felt arms wrap out me and pull me into a tight hug, and I wrapped mine around him without hesitantion.

"I'm so sooorry Anndy, for eeverythingg" I tried to say as I chocked back my tears, "shh it's ok, don't be sorry" Andy said as stroked my hair. We made our way back to the shore and sat under the tree where we had left our towels. There was just silence and it was starting to get really awkward when Andy spoke, "After you left...I um, I went with Jake to the airports to try and find you, but we were too late..I'm so sorry Ash, I wasn't thinking that night when I just left you leave..." I heard himchoke back his tears and I could see them reflecting the moon light. "No Andy, you have nothing to be sorry for, I'm the one who just ran away from all my problems, I didn't even tell you where I was going" I said in a small voice, I couldn't stand to see him crying like this.

-le time jump a bit *both have told the other about their time apart*-

"Sounds like you have a good life in England then, yeah?" Andy asked, "yeah, it's good but nothing compared to home" I said playing with the sand around my legs. It was nice talking with Andy, he didn't hate me at all and it felt like we were never apart, I couldn't have been more happier. Well maybe if we were together, but I know that won't ever happen, I mean he has a girlfriend now and so do I. "Ash..?" I heard Andy whisper near my ear, I hadn't relised I had zoned out for a bit there but him whispering my name brough me right back to where I actually was. I turned to face him to see him only inches from my face.

My heart started to heat faster, he was a bit too close for my liking. That's a lie, there was nothing more that I wanted than for him to kiss me, but I knew it wouldn't ever happen. "Ash, do you still have feelings for me?" he asked, still leaning in close "umm...no, I'm sorry, when I met Kina I moved on..sorry Andy" I tried to reply in a calm voice, though every ince of both my head and heart was screaming at me telling me to tell him the truth. But I don't deserve Andy, I don't want to ruin his life, he has a girlfriend who I can tell he loves dearly, I don't want to ruin that for him. I could tell he was hurt by my words as he leant back and stood up. He started to walk away but I yelled out to him "Andy, wait...I...I love you"

Notes

I'm so sorry that it;s taken over a month for this chapter!!
I promise it won't happen again, but if it does hassel me on tumblr? kneelandprayforclosurebaby.tumblr.com

Comments

i...so... fucking... love this!!!!! *----* cant wait for next chap. until then i will try to finally find this damn person who is cutting those fucking onions e.e

KishuMai KishuMai
12/11/13
UPDATE YOU AMAZING HUMAN!!!
UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM DEADLY SERIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PWEEZE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! X x x
AshleighPurdy AshleighPurdy
4/21/13
@PurdyGirlLove no
Yes yes *stroked chin thinkingly* (thinkinly? is that even a word?) Yes I believe this story is quite the catch. quite. wanna read mine?? you should lol/
PurdyGirlLove PurdyGirlLove
4/1/13