*Carson's POV*

'I have to go baby..'

Ian said. I looked at him sadly. I knew that something had sparked between us that definitely never should have. We have had many moments & we both had feelings for each other. I was being pulled out of my thoughts by Ian walking closer to me.

'Uhg, okay.'

He pulled me close to him kissing my lips lightly. He kissed me in front of everyone. He just kissed me in front of all of the guys. What did this mean? I'd have to text him about it later. The feeling of that kiss sent shivers down my back. What was happening to me?

'Bye, beautiful.'

I smiled & waved as he walked out the door & got into his mom's silver car.

I sighed.

'Someone's falling hard for Ian & she doesn't even fucking know it.'

CC said.

'Please, shut the hell up...'

I said. I really needed to collect my thoughts. I walked over to Ashley. All the guys were over for a movie night. I cuddled into his side as Batman started to play.

'Really, Batman? Again, Biersack?'

Jake said. Andy just gave a glare as CC was studying Ashley's hands.

'Hey, bro. Watch those hands, pervy Purdy.'

CC said. Ash laughed. I was being completely serious.

'Seriously.. I just need a cuddle buddy. If i'm that irresistible i'll go sit with someone else.'

I said. I got up & walked into my room. I don't know what caused me to get so upset. Maybe it was the fact that i didn't know my feelings or i wanted something to happen with Ian that couldn't because of the tours. Or maybe it was simply because my depression was coming back. But whatever it was, i felt bad. I reached my room & slammed the door.

'Fuck!'

I punched a wall with tears streaming my face.

*CC's POV*

I don't know what happened or what caused her to get so angry, but when she got to her room, all i heard was.

'Fuck!'

& a loud crash. I ran to her room, telling to other guys to stay downstairs.

'Carr, can i come in?'

I asked, softly. She was crying. But she muffled a yes. I opened the door. There was a hole in the wall. She was collapsed on the floor in tears. I don't know what happened but all that mattered was that she needed a hug. I picked her off the floor & put her in my lap. Cooing her.

'Shhh.'

She stopped crying after about 45 minutes.

'I'm sorry, i don't know what has gotten into me.. I... I just love Ian with every fiber of my being & when Ash said that.. I don't know. It really pissed me off. Then i got so much more upset because I don't know exactly what is going on between Ian & I & i just. I just can't deal with...'

She trailed off & looked at her legs. There was something she was hiding something.

'Carson Marie Mora Coma. What is wrong.'

I said. She kept staring at her legs. She wouldn't look up from them. It's like her eyes told a story but her mouth said nothing. I didn't know how to react to this. I never had a 15 year old living with me before. But it clicked instantly.

'Carson, you don't self harm do you?'

She stopped for a second.

'Nah.'

She said. I felt like she was lying. But i didn't push it anymore. I just let her cry on me & focused on how to get that hole fixed.

*Carson's POV*

I was so close to telling CC about my self harm.. Things would have been so much better. But i didn't. I couldn't. We walked back downstairs once i was okay. Deciding to sit next to no one this time. I took out my phone.

What did that kiss mean...? -Carson.

What did you want it to mean? -Ian

I wanted it to mean what it meant to you. If you want me to be your fucking girlfriend tell me. I'm tripping over emotions & i can't do it anymore. It's obvious you want something with me, at least i hope, so i don't make a fucking ass out of myself for saying that, but i know i want something with you. I don't want to pressure anything. I just want to know what the fuck it meant.. -Carson.

Is it that obvious that i want you to be my girlfriend? Fuck.. Ever since the day i laid my eyes on you at dinner i knew i wanted something with you, weather we had to be just friends. You're perfect in every way, Carson Marie Mora Coma. I want you to be what you are willing to be. If you'll be my girlfriend. Yes, please be my girlfriend? -Ian.

Hell fucking yes. (: -Carson.

I broke into a smile.

'Someone's happy.'

Jake said.

'Ian's finally mine. & I'm finally his.'

I said, smiling. Everyone clapped. I couldn't be more happy. I have the guy of my dreams. I wanted this more than anything. Nothing was going to tear us apart, either.