Reyas POV
Hot, angry tears began to form in my eyes. I slammed the screen closed. I got up and shoved the chair over, jumping as it smashed into the floor. I pulled at my hair and stomped my foot. I wanted yell at the top of my lungs, my chest burned. I heard Brandon call, "Everything OK, Reya?"
I took a millisecond to check myself, "Yeah just knocked over my chair accidentally!"

I wanted to just...I don't even know. There is no explaining just how insane my thoughts were. How could Andy do this to me? What the fuck is he thinking? Was he thinking? I don't know who I'm more mad at, Andy or Juliet. I didn't like Juliet from the start, when she had come into the apartment and complained about CC and I yelling. Her eyes glued to Andy and her body swayed seductively toward him. I knew then that she was going to try something to Andy and I. Her ever word was said right to Andy and it was laced with sugar and flirt. Gahh I wanted to fucking scream at the top of my lungs. I needed to talk to someone. I was in no way going to tell Brandon, Siren was already asleep because it was 11pm. I opened my phone, twitter coming up first.
Fuck this all. More pictures of Andy and Juliet had been posted.
BVBbride: @AndyBVB and @julietsimmesall are fucking adorable
PanicwithBrides: Saw @julietsimmsall and @AndyBVB today. Kissy kissy action ;)
Jinxxygirl43: I met @AndyBVB today with @julietsimmsall. They've been signing stuff together all day!

More pictures of Andy and Juliet signing stuff side by side, and a few others of them kissing by the bus. I close the app and pull up her number, tears forming in my eyes, my throat feeling thick.
"Hello?"
"Sammi?...this is Reya."
"Hey Rey! What's up?"
"Have you...seen Andy today around warped? I know you are with Jinxx this week."
"Huh uh. I've been away from the stuff today for Jinxx and I to spend time together."
"Oh...OK never mind." I replied.
"You sound upset, did something happen?" she asked.
"Can you...put it on speaker so I can talk to Jinxx too?" I heard her mumble something.
"Yeah...on speaker now."
"What's wrong, Reya?" Jinxx asked.
"Has Andy...been...OK lately?" I asked.
"He's seemed kinda spacey but he does that. Everything OK?"
"No...have you been on twitter?"
"Hold on let me...Oh...fuck..." he replied. I heard Sammi gasp. "God dammit Andy." he whispered.
"I take it you see what I saw."
"Rey! I'm sorry, its probably not what you think," Sammi added.
"I need to go."
"No, Rey! Stay on the phone, please!" Sammi said.

I hung up. She started calling again. I put it on silent. I was going to regret this. I couldn't handle the rage of emotions. It was too much and I had no way to release it...I only knew of one...

Andys POV
I had been signing stuff all day with Juliet. We couldn't help but catch each others eyes a few times. She would blush and I would smile. We had had fans coming up all day. So many asked if I would tweet a picture with them, but I had to tell them that I forgot my phone. I had accidentally left it on my bunk this morning. My hand was beginning to hurt, thank god I'm not performing today. I don't think I could hold a mic after holding this sharpie. Someone tapped my shoudler. I turned to see Jake holding his phone.
"For you," he mumbled as he shoved it in my hand. What's his problem?
"Hello?" I answered.
"WHAT THE FUCK ANDY, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU WOULD EVEN HAVE THE DAMN NERVE-" Sammi screamed. I pulled the phone away and heard Jinxx mumble something to her.
"Andy?" Jinxx answered.
"Are you going to scream in my ear for reasons unknown to me too?"
"Seriously, Andy, have you not seen your twitter?"
"No, my phone is on the bus."
"Might wanna go get your phone," he said.
"I will in a bit."
"Nows better."

i sighed and wavved to Jake to take over my signing spot. Fans began griping and moaning about me not signing. I kept the phone on as I walked the two minutes to our tour bus. I grabbed my phone off the top bunk. Four missed calls, two voicemails, so many twitter notifications. I opened the app. I gasped.
"Reya saw it too..." Jinxx said quietly.
My throat had a lump in it, and I swallowed, freezing in my spot. "Shit."

Reyas POV
My hand shook as I opened the small black bag in my bathroom. I'm so glad I have my open private bathroom off my room. My fingers lingered around the bag as I searched for my one relief. My lips turned up as my finger grazed the cold metal. It had been almost four months since I had used it. I can't believe I'm using this, or even doing this. I can't control my racing thoughts anymore. I need an end for this pain in my chest, the panic in my head, the hurt in my heart, the twisting in my gut. I closed my eyes and pulled the blade out of the bag. I slowly opened my eyes after a deep breath, my pupils focusing on the piece of sharpened silver metal. I took off my band wristbands off my left arm., all twelve. I paused as I removed the purple and black black veil brides band. I tossed it to join the rest. Brandon was already guaranteed asleep now. I sunk down in the tub of my bathroom. I stared at the scars, they had faded so much...only silvery reminders now. It will be noticed if I do it again. I can't do this to my legs, I live in Florida, I wear shorts all the time. Arm it is. Not even caring, I close my eyes and guide the blade to my arm, pressing down. I slides it over my arm, again and again as I moved slowly up. I stopped at my mid arm. I admired my work, smiling at the small currents of life that blossomed and dripped down my arm and into my fingers I didn'tdo it like last times last time I tried to kill myself, I just needed a relief. I closed my eyes and rested my head on the back of the tub. The euphoria and adrenaline kicked in, and I experienced the twisted sick rush. I continued to marvel at the feeling of the blood running down my arm. It was warm and slow, my mind eased, my heart stopped pounding. I began to feel the crash, went the adrenaline and serotonin decrease and return to normal levels. I sat up and rinsed off the cuts, smiling at the irritated pain the water brought. I got out of the tub and rinsed the drying blood from the tubs basin. I got out my bandaging kit, and put the antibiotic paste on the skin colored gauze piece. I covered the angry slashes and wrapped the bandaging wrap over. It was the exact same color as my skin. I put on all of the wristbands, which covered the entire bandage. Good. I returned the blade to my black bag, knowing, this wasn't the last time I wouldn't be the last time with my metal friend...

Notes

More to come (:

check out my other series too Fight for FEAR